to have slapped my dd age 18 months

[underthebridge]

its really not as bad as it sounds and i was having a terrible day.

i have been really struggling for cash this week, its not easy being a single mum on benefits and i was down to my last £500.

so anyway i pull up at the supermarket in the 4x4 to find all the p&t spaces have gone so i park in a disabled, jump out the 4x4 and snag my new boden top in the process.

i go to grab dd from the car seat and find it filled with sausage roll crumbs and empty fruit shoot bottles, i really should of bf her before we left but as it is so inconvenient (and i was drunk) i decided sausage rolls and fruit shoots were the way to go.

she starts screaming as soon as we get into the shop and no matter how many free grapes i throw down her neck she will not shut it, so i gave her a quick slap.

what would you have done if you were me

Goodness there are some uptight people on here. Read it initially with mounting horror and then made me laugh so thank you OP.

ok i am being anal now but is driving drunk neglecting kids and smaking funny?really?

"i really should of bf her". I assume you mean that you should have bf her.

not funny in rl, OBVIOUSLY......
funny as a send up of mn cliches? in the context and spirit of the thread? yes.

is that a sense of humour i can see on the ground by your left foot?

I giggled. Personally thought snagging my new boden top was funny!!

well if it was about mn cliches she wouldnt have bf she would have dar i say it.................................................................................................. ...........bottle fed

Were you on your way to have a word with her teacher because you don't think she's bringing home difficult - sorry, I mean challenging -enough reading books?

No, which is why i do none of these things. I don t suppose a racist, sexist boss like David Brent in The Office is all that funny in real life but we all manage to find a way to laugh at that don t we?

I laughed, if it helps?

Excellent posting name too.

you could have ended with xxx and thnx huns
too

Well I smiled...

Lol, made me smile too.

I smiled too! And was not at all surprised at the usual- sense -of- humour -failure- and -uncharitable -remarks brigade who trot out on posts like these!

That was funny. at the I was drunk part I went back to the top and started reading it again in case I had missed something

If I were you I would have gone to Waitrose, the staff will fetch a portable naughty step if mummy's having a stressful day.

I like your namechange btw.

hahahhhaaahhaaah.

hahaahhhahaahaaha.

nice summary of the week's mn topics.

hahahaaahhhaaahhha.

lol, you forgot to say that your mooncup was leaking

Can anyone fill an OP with more MN cliches?