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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not think 26 is young for a first baby

220 replies

Wildtimes78889 · 03/07/2021 19:27

Dd is pregnant and 26 and people keep saying how young she is. Aibu to think it’s perfectly average age to have a baby.

OP posts:
luciles · 03/07/2021 19:27

Perfectly normal, people need to keep their opinions to themselves.

Toomuchspinning · 03/07/2021 19:31

I don’t think it’s too young, but statistically it is young. 29 is the average age for a first time mother in England and Wales.

CaptainSpirit · 03/07/2021 19:32

Not usual at all, most people I know had their first child at 26/27. I don't understand why anyone would feel the need to comment on your DDs age, what has it got to do with them? 🤷🏻‍♀️

I was 21 when I had my first, no-one batted an eye or said anything rude about my age. I'm 25 now and due my third in a few months.

secular39 · 03/07/2021 19:32

No.....

CrowBones · 03/07/2021 19:32

Perfectly normal age, best of luck to her and congratulations!

Mylittlesandwich · 03/07/2021 19:34

I had some comments like this. I was just 27 when I had DS. I also met some mums who were quite a bit younger than me.

MindyStClaire · 03/07/2021 19:34

Anything under 30 is young in my circles. But young doesn't mean too young!

Original poster
Wildtimes78889 · 03/07/2021 19:34

Yes that’s what I’m thinking I was 21 when I had her and did feel a bit young but she’s a bit older

OP posts:
OldSamVimes · 03/07/2021 19:34

Totally normal, congratulations to her Flowers

JeanClaudeVanDammit · 03/07/2021 19:35

Would have been young in my social group but who cares? If she’s in a good position/situation to have a baby now good luck to her.

DrDetriment · 03/07/2021 19:35

I think it's young but I wouldn't dream of commenting to her and I think it depends where you live. Where I live most women have children in their 30s as they are well educated and establish a career first.

RubyFowler · 03/07/2021 19:37

It depends on where you live. I was 26 and I live on the outskirts of a very posh town, but the other side is a more working class area.
Depending which side I went for baby group I was either really old or really young compared to the other mothers!
Looking back i think I could have waited a bit longer, it definitely impacted my career.

ComDummings · 03/07/2021 19:38

Depends on your social circle really; my friends are only starting to have babies now we are in our mid 30s. I was 24 which obviously seemed very young to all my friends and family. At antenatal appointments there would mainly be women older than me waiting bar the odd few who looked younger. However if all your friends have their first baby at 21/22 then that wouldn’t seem young at all.

Kitkat151 · 03/07/2021 19:38

Definately not young...my daughter had her first at 21 ..
She’s 27 now.... I didn’t think she was particularly young at 21

Ahnowcomon · 03/07/2021 19:39

Not at all and physically a good time to have a first baby. Better to be married though, I don't know if you said your daughter is or not.
We had our first around 27 and it didn't feel young then, we had our degrees , travelled loads, married and did post grads . We bought our house after baby two but thankfully we did it then as lived abroad for our first and so glad we didn't buy there . We feel young now as almost 37 and all put friends have first newborns or pregnant with number 1 and we are all at the same level with jobs etc..we have a ten year old, 7 year old and 4 year old.
We feel great now as starting to get some sleep again, back running and gone through all the baby/toddler , having to decide whether to have anther baby and we're still relatively young ! So your daughter is definitely not too young.

Kitkat151 · 03/07/2021 19:40

@DrDetriment

I think it's young but I wouldn't dream of commenting to her and I think it depends where you live. Where I live most women have children in their 30s as they are well educated and establish a career first.
Little bit judgemental 🙄 So are young Mums uneducated in your opinion?
kowari · 03/07/2021 19:41

@Toomuchspinning

I don’t think it’s too young, but statistically it is young. 29 is the average age for a first time mother in England and Wales.
Based on just that average I would say that five years either side, so 24 to 34, is neither young nor old.
Mummyof2andapig · 03/07/2021 19:42

Where I live most women have children in their 30s as they are well educated
Hmm

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 03/07/2021 19:42

I had mine at 25&26.
It was what worked for us.
I'm loving being mid thirties with two adventurous preteens right now.

Thisisthemonth · 03/07/2021 19:43

its at least 6 years younger than any of my circle of friends who have had babies, but its not too young, just more unusual these days.

woodhill · 03/07/2021 19:43

Absolutely fine imo.

First time mum at that age and my own dd was even younger

SesameOrangutan · 03/07/2021 19:43

I was 24 when DS was born and you would not believe the comments and reactions from people - I felt like a knocked-up school girl. We'd been married for two and a half years when I fell pregnant and yet everyone was shocked. We owned a house, a dog, both had postgraduate degrees and steady jobs. When we told FIL he said "oh, well, gosh" and hung up the phone (he's genuinely lovely and apologised for being so shocked)... I was baffled by how completely and totally outraged so many people were.
In contrast, DSis struggled to conceive her first in her mid/late 30s and suffered a miscarriage, and my two SILs (DH's DSis and DBro's DW) both didn't TTC until mid-30s and neither have become pregnant yet, one SIL has had multiple rounds of IVF. I find it awful that so many women are pressured into not having children in their 20s by the judgemental attitudes of others and end up with problems with fertility.

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 03/07/2021 19:44

Incidentally I have a Masters degree and a post graduate qualification on top of that. I like to think I'm reasonably well educated despite having children in my mid twenties.

Tanfastic · 03/07/2021 19:44

Not at all, ignore them.

I had mine age 35 but I'd have much preferred them younger, circumstances just didn't allow.

Maggiesfarm · 03/07/2021 19:45

Perfectly normal; of course she is quite young but certainly not too young. 27 is supposed to be the ideal age, in an all round way, for having first baby. A year or two either way makes little difference.

Anyway it's nobody else's business.