To not think 26 is young for a first baby

[Wildtimes78889]

Dd is pregnant and 26 and people keep saying how young she is. Aibu to think it’s perfectly average age to have a baby.

Sounds like a perfect age.

I’m fed up of this pressure on women to have kids later and later. It’s bad for the mother’s body, makes incontinence etc much more likely, much harder to do night eakings etc and too old to enjoy (or help physically with) grandchildren.

To those saying that it’s younger than average, statistically - until my parents generation the average first time mum was age 24, all previous generations were younger than that.

Where I grew up, people tended to have babies young (early twenties). My first was born in London and at 31, I was the youngest in our NCT group. A couple were ten years older than me and having their firsts… At DC’s school, the main difference between the ‘older’ and ‘younger’ parents is within the class FB pages (not official school ones). Some (not all) of the younger mums seem to use them as their personal sounding boards, slag off teachers, slag off children they perceive to have slighted their children. Quite frankly, it’s embarrassing. It’s just not something the older/sometimes more highly educated parents engage in.

I think it depends on your circle. It feels young to me; but only because at that time I was travelling a lot, having fun, and building a career; so I couldn’t imagine a child at that age.

However, everyone is different and if it works for her then it’s no one else’s business.

I had my first at 26. I didn't feel too you and most of my friends had their first around the same age. Having a baby at 26 and 28 is much easier than having one at 40.

I don't think it's too young. I'm 37 with a toddler and I'm too tired for another 2 years of broken nights even if I wanted another!

No one I know had children under 30 so it would feel young to me. I'd never say anything though.

At 26 I was renting in London with a friend, had a rocky relationship and an income that wouldn't have allowed me to rent and pay for nursery. Good for her if she's able to do that.

@Twelvetimestwo

Do you know what. I'm absolutely sick of all the judgement women get for everything childbirth related.

SAHM/WOHM
Younger/older mothers
Breastfeeding/bottle feeding
Cry it out/co sleeping
Attachment parenting or not
Gentle parenting/Gina Ford baby

It's ENDLESS!!!

This is very true. We all need very thick skins which is very wearing!

It’s young, but not too young by the sound of it.

Why are you so bothered? People stick their beam in about everything to do with motherhood and kids. Just ignore is the most sensible plan.

I was 30 and I was the youngest in my NCT group by 3/4 years. 26 doesn’t sound old but when I look at ages of mums in all of the baby and toddler groups I attend, she would be the youngest definitely.

@Twelvetimestwo 💯

It would be very young in my circle. But it’s not too young no.

I was 27 when I had my first. I wouldn't say that 27 was young. I think it was just right.

I'd focus on the person. Some 26 year olds are still figuring it all out, so are some 30 year olds! It's not really anyone else's business, except maybe a professional if they're THAT bad at it.

I think it's more about situation. If she's settled and financially secure etc she's old enough to have a baby. Of she's still living with you, on and off bf, intending for you to provide all the childcare or cash, she isn't.

Congratulations on the grand baby

I think it's a little young but in a positive way. Most of my friends, all of whom went to university which seems to put you back a few years, started at about 28 at the very earliest.

We had our first at 25/26. We were also married at 24/25 and had a mortgage at 23/24. We were the first in all our families and friends to do either at that age other than generations before us. We have only just became auntie and uncle at nearly 40. Our siblings are in their 30s and just started their families.

We were told "you are very young to be settling down" but our siblings are also told that "they left it ages didn't they. The clock was ticking"

People will always pass comments. What matters is that there are people around to help and to lean on, no matter the age a milestone is reached.

@Kitkat151 Based on my own family history, a woman having a first child at 21 to 25 was most common, under 21 less so. So I would consider it young, and not just based on averages of today.

26 is a healthy age to have a baby…not too young to be immature but young enough to have the energy and motivation to be a great mother.

I was 27 and the first of my peers (I worked for one of the big four). Like others have said, it really depended where I was. Compared to my middle class antenatal group I was young, compared to the rest of my very upper middle class aqua babies class I was very young but compared to some of the sure start things I went to I was quite old!

I looked a lot younger than I was and did find people to be either quite judgemental or quite surprised when they realised I had a good job.

@Skysblue

Sounds like a perfect age.

I’m fed up of this pressure on women to have kids later and later. It’s bad for the mother’s body, makes incontinence etc much more likely, much harder to do night eakings etc and too old to enjoy (or help physically with) grandchildren.

To those saying that it’s younger than average, statistically - until my parents generation the average first time mum was age 24, all previous generations were younger than that.

Yes, but now it is statistically young - also our life expectancy is much higher than previous generations.

There's also loads of research to show that older parents tend to have children with fewer behavioural challenges (and this carries across all socio-economic groups, so isn't just about wealthy/educated parents waiting longer, as some on this thread have suggested).

I had my first mid-twenties, I had lots of energy but there were few other mothers of my age around. My last was early 30s, and while I'm glad I was done by then, I can also see how waiting longer could have been good, in terms of maturity and also because if I'd been less keen to have kids young, with maturity I might have made better choices in picking a partner.

I had my second two weeks before I turned 26, and that was me done and dusted. No regrets.

👋 17 when I had my 1st was a massive shock (dd is this age now), but 26 I think that is fine to me any age is fine so younger some old. Yes I have worked and built up my career, yes I'm still with her dad, yes I'm married, no I wouldn't change a thing, just answering the normal questions I get 😁

Perfectly normal, I had a mortgage at 24, married at 25. We only started ttc at 27 as my husband had planned a holiday with a longhaul flight and I didn't want to pregnant a long way from home! But we were ready to have babies! 😃

Maybe given so many older mums it seems that way

@DrDetriment that could come across as people in their 20s are not well educated and not established in careers. FYI I graduated from university at 21 and started my nursing career straight away!