Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

would you do this for your DH?

313 replies

LittleGoldfish · 23/11/2007 11:30

My DH has managed to get 9 points on his drivers license for speeding offences, I however in my 36 years have never managed any.

He asked me if I would have the next set of points put on my drivers license otherwise he will lose his license (in other words say it was me driving). I told him to f off and to learn how to stick to the speed limit- I can managed it so why can't he?

AIBU about this, he reckons 3 points on my license wont make much difference but I am in the process of having a CRB check done (applied to study nursing) and don't want any criminal offences although I know they don't take driving offences too seriously, but still.

He is in a major mood with me atm. AIBU about not wanting someone elses points on my license? especially as I haven't been the one speeding.

OP posts:
Amethyst8 · 23/11/2007 21:39

My parents had exactly the same situation and TBH I thought my Mum was really selfish for not taking my Dad's points. She does not work and my Dad supports them both with his job that involves alot of driving. YANBU for being angry about it but if it was me and DH and he would lose his job then I would do it for him.

chenin · 23/11/2007 21:41

isn't it all give and take...? Yes, a big think to ask but you could get some serious mileage out of this...

chenin · 23/11/2007 21:42

a big thing not think...!

Elasticwoman · 23/11/2007 21:42

Amethyst - is there not a difference between taking the points when the last 3 are awarded, and promising to do so beforehand, in other words giving him carte blanche to break the law?

FluffyMummy123 · 23/11/2007 22:03

Message withdrawn

FluffyMummy123 · 23/11/2007 22:03

Message withdrawn

FluffyMummy123 · 23/11/2007 22:08

Message withdrawn

VeniVidiVickiQV · 23/11/2007 22:08

Agree cod.

policywonk · 23/11/2007 22:12

helliebean - I really think that people who exceed 30mph limits are the worst of the lot. Those are exactly the areas where you are most likely to cause injury and death to pedestrians. If a child darted out from behind a parked car and you hit them at 36mph, you'd probably kill them. How 'safe' is that?

choosyfloosy · 23/11/2007 22:13

i assume lazarou is your dh, littlegoldfish?

he's your wife now...

(oh and YANBU)

FluffyMummy123 · 23/11/2007 22:13

Message withdrawn

FluffyMummy123 · 23/11/2007 22:15

Message withdrawn

Lazarou · 23/11/2007 22:16

Actually Ive never had any points on my licence. I'm a good girl.

FluffyMummy123 · 23/11/2007 22:18

Message withdrawn

Lazarou · 23/11/2007 22:23

Choosyfloosy, i am not a man! The bulge is just my beetle bonnet!

EricL · 23/11/2007 22:25

This is a difficult one.

This has very nearly happened to us.

DW was on 9 points and she started off a convo very similar to the OP's DH about what it would mean to lose her licence and how she would get to work, blah blah.

I knew where it was heading as i don't have any points at all.

I told her to get a grip and stick to the speed limits like everyone else. It's not that difficult to do is it? Especially when your life could be seriously messed up with the consequances.

Stick to your guns and let him stick to the limit. He needs to learn. Speeding offences are not there as annoying financial burdens - they are supposed to be a warning to drive safely. It's up to him to learn from it - not think about getting out of the next one.

It shows a complete diregard for the law and the safety of others. The speed limits are for safety - not to frustrate drivers.

EricL · 23/11/2007 22:27

Sorry - forgot to add that she now drives within the speed limits all the time.

She says it was hard to get out of the habit - but she did it.

FluffyMummy123 · 23/11/2007 22:27

Message withdrawn

LadyOfWaffle · 23/11/2007 22:31

Haven't read all the other posts but I would TBH. I have taken the claim for DH crashing my car (the person who drove him off the road drove off so we had no one to get the claim from) and he had alot of no claims. I know it's illegal and that, I think there are bigger wrongs in the world.

FluffyMummy123 · 23/11/2007 22:32

Message withdrawn

DrSpeckschwarteSurprise · 23/11/2007 22:36

No, it is illegal.

I could understand (not approve, but I would see why he would ask you) if he had been caught speeding again. But he is planning on speeding again, he is fully aware that he might be caught. Why would he risk it? Not to mention the risk to other roadusers.

If he wants to speed, tell him to come over to Germany and have a shot of our autobahn for a day or two. He might get it out of his system. (btw, we cannot swap points here as the photos are very clear)

A friend of ours got done for speeding recently and asked his gran if she would take the points for him. She replied, "Young man, I am not going to take the rap for you"

EricL · 23/11/2007 22:37

It's about teaching someone that they need to take responsibility for their own stupid actions - especially when it is so easily avoided.

LadyOfWaffle · 23/11/2007 22:37
Heated · 23/11/2007 22:37

I would assume that if he is on 9points and suddenly 'someone else' is driving his car they might bother to look at the photo evidence!

At which point he will not only lose his licence but both of you will acquire criminal records.

So you are definitely right, he is being unreasonable and employing brain cells in single figures on this one.

Lazarou · 23/11/2007 22:40

What about putting cling film over the number plate? Somebody [bloke down the pub] told me that the picture is distorted