I went on a bender and told friends im related to an elderly dead singer from the 80s

[AdifferentGoat]

Simple as that. Not proud of my behaviour. I just exploded and while i certainly drank enough to out party the elderly white singer im allegedly related to... Am i being unreasonable to to flee the country as to escape the humuliation?

These arent the closest of friends but certainly a nice group of ladies. It's either i die or postshop photos of myself into some of his later days and hooe no one wonders why i haven't aged in 20 years ..Im shocked no one has clocked on the age difference.

Oh God. Back to sobriety

"Islands In The Stream" should be changed to "I Lie When I'm Steamed" especially for you OP

@FloydWasACat

"Islands In The Stream" should be changed to "I Lie When I'm Steamed" especially for you OP

Yes! 🤣

Op I hear you. I went on a bender and told my work my mum had died. I've had to keep it up for 20 years and can never mention her and have to act sad on Mother's Day. I got in too deep and couldn't get out

There are sad drunks, aggressive drunks, reckless drunks... at least you're a creative drunk!!

I just remembered one of the lies I told in my drinking days. I told all of my friends I was an extra on the titanic movie. Despite being about nine when it came out . I'll never really understand what level of my subconscious a vodka lemonade activates to make me talk such utter shite.

I appreciate you are mortified and you have stuff going on but don't be too hard on yourself, you haven't hurt anyone (god rest Kenny's soul).

So fucking funny

I usually try out accents when I’ve had a few. I think I’m amazing at the time. Worst time was when I pretended I was from NewYork in a room full of Texans.

Somebody filmed it. It was like Alan Partridge attempting an Irish accent. Like that. But much, much worse.

Can I go on the piss with you sometime OP?

OP I really feel like you won’t have lost any friends. You may have put off some acquaintances, but I’m positive that you will have cemented some life long friendships last night - these are the type of nights you find your tribe, and you would have massively endeared yourself to the majority of people with your bonkers ness and then the brilliant way you dealt with it.
The fact your therapist laughed said it all - this was harmless, hilarious and clearly very common!😂😂

I had some moments like this, but they were many years ago. Nothing that quite rises to your level of mastery, however.

Sobriety can be a bit boring in comparison, but it's much easier in the long run.

Brilliant . You'd really run off to Islands in the Stream for that ? Ha ha.... wonderful story and YANBU

Lol...I did mean YABU

Oh my old friend used to do this. Quiet as a mouse until drunk & then she was the life & soul of any party with fantastic tales to tell. All bull of course, including being a nun in a break from a convent & unsure of her vis. She pulled a few times with that one 😂. We all thought it was hilarious

Would that not give you the same surname, unless you have taken a married name?

I have a different surname to my brother because we have different dads.

So that would explain why you have a different surname to your er uncle if your dad and his ex brother have different dads 😆

You could always try for a slot on the Spit or Swallow podcast ...

I once convinced a group of idiots in a nightclub that I ran a male model agency.

They were pulling off their shirts and flexing their muscles while I appraised them with a straight face saying 'Hmmmm...' and 'My clients prefer someone taller.'

I'm slightly hungover this morning, and this thread is making me feel so much better!

This thread is fab. We’ve all been there OP (well, maybe not exactly there, but in the region…!!).
I’m still chuckling at the milk-float-driving sister

You had the beer fear , hopefully today it’ll be over with and you can laugh

What a great thread. I once got drunk whilst at a rock festival in a tiny village. I apparently told one of the bands that I was a talent scout/agent, that they had real promise and I'd love to represent them in the US. I'm certain they saw through me and were probably sniggering behind their instruments at me. Still feel cringey sick about it and it was over 20 years ago!

You sound fab OP, I'd love to spend a night with you!

Another one who hadn't realised that the wonderful Kenny Rogers had departed this world 😳

Update. I have yet to leave the country. Apparently it's not the easiest arranging for travel during this covid era. Besides I still haven't adopted out my imaginery dogs. I hope to get that done in the next week.

I have deleted all evidence of my good self parading around like a rounded supermodel who has seen better days. The hamsters are still recovering from their stint of fame on social media. One has been resting all day. The other hidden under a pile of hay.

My dead fake relative has been playing nonstop in the background. He may never know it but the last few days of stolen fame on the back of his glittering jacket have given me a lot to think about.

Till then, it's great to know the kind ladies of Mumsnet:

'.. Believe in me. I'll never quite know what they see in me...
While they lay sleeping
I stayed out late at night and rescued (fake) dogs and filmed my hamsters.
And sometimes all the nights can be so long (yet so productive!)
And it's good when I finally make it home, all alone (with all my achievements)
While they dreaming'

Thank you for the stories and thank you for making me feel less foolish🙏 Also I hope dear uncle Kenny doesn't haunt me from beyond for taking liberty with his lyrics and making them my own

Jokes aside, I have loved the stories. If any of you are ever stateside, feel free to reach out. I'd love to galavant the streets together regaling strangers with our heroics.

I’m curious now 😂 At my old work we had to tell everyone our hidden talents as part of a team building exercise…I have no talents yet alone hidden ones. Rather than admit this I said I played grade 8 flute 🙄 For three years until I left, people would ask about it from time to time and I’d always just laugh it off praying that no-one would join the team who knew loads about flutes!

@LunaNorth

Kenny Rogers is dead?!

Nonsense, he's in the witness protection program, as am I. We had lunch together last month.

😁