Short school skirts

[Kteeb1]

AIBU to think the reason given to me for girls not wearing skirts at school is worrying? So just been called by the school. Apparently all parents have been because girls skirts are very short and it's against school policy. I can only assume the little tyke (13) is rolling her school skirt up because it's not short when she leaves the house and ill sort it when she gets in, but I am concerned with what the female teacher said to me. The reason why the girls skirts shouldn't be short is because male teachers and other boys may feel uncomfortable. Also out of school grounds the girls might be attacked. And young girls must learn to protect their dignity. I have no problem with a uniform and following it, but if male teachers are uncomfortable in seeing a 13 year old with a short skirt, should they really be teaching? And why are we saying what a person wears means they may be attacked. I did ask if any girls had been attacked and I didn't get an answer. I just think it's a really bad message that girls have to change what they wear for those reasons.

@Kteeb1

I think my problem is by saying short skirts make male teachers uncomfortable, rather than all teachers, it is sexulising them. Saying that a girl may be attacked because her skirt is short is both untrue and dangerous. As I said I have no issues with a uniform policy being enforced. I have just had a discussion with said child and confirmed this, and confirmed that I wouldn't be able to wear what I am wearing (an off the shoulder top) at work. But not because my male colleagues wouldn't be able to control themselves or I may get raped on the tube, but because its not professional. If I get raped on the tube its nothing to do with what I was wearing. Sarah Everard was wearing a coat and hat and gloves. It's a bad message to give our young people, boys and girls.

I agree completely. The way the issue is framed matters in terms of forming young people's view of why something is appropriate or not, and therefore how they will assess acceptable behaviour in future situations.

Saying this to young girls may makes them believe they are to blame if harrassed or assaulted while wearing "skimpy" clothes. Saying this to young boys may make them think it's more acceptable to harrass or assault girls wearing such clothing, outside school.

It’s these skirts that are not rolled up / they are bought too short.

@StoneofDestiny

It’s these skirts that are not rolled up / they are bought too short.

Who is letting their daughter go to school dressed like that though?

Erm loads of folk???!!!

We are the nation of Love Island and Naked Attraction, remember?

Polkadot
Many hundreds of parents!
It can be eye popping driving passed schools - no way if that skirt suitable for work, but it will also ride up even further when walking, climbing stairs and sitting at a desk.

That's horrendous. I am genuinely shocked any parent would allow that.

I'm a HCP. A bit long in the tooth, granted! (57).

At times during my long career I have been occasionally faced with/confronted with (90-95% male) patients who pretty much refuse to wear appropriate covering for their imaging examinations.

It's always 'Okay, could you pop on this gown?'- him 'Nah, love, I'm easy!' (Strips off).

Well, guess what? I'm not and nor should the patient following you. Put the gown on, mate. It's not all about how you want to project.

Why is that any different to requiring female pupils to dress in a way that doesn't make others feel uncomfortable? You can wear a really quite short skirt without being gynaecological, miss.

Yeah teacher perhaps shouldn't have mentioned the male teachers, although I think what she means is, male teachers could get accused of 'perving'

I was in Tesco queue the other day, the young girl infront of me had the shortest shorts I've ever seen, they certainly were not covering her bum! I felt awkward walking behind her as she's in my line of sight, am sure if I was a man, I would feel even more uneasy

I mean my kids aren't at secondary school, but the school is not far away and I have often driven past there at start/ finish times and see lots of them walking home frequently and I have honestly never seen anybody wearing anything remotely like that photo.

Yes, hellogem, I tend to avoid being near schools at throwing out time - but got stuck in traffic queue recently on a very long road that had several high schools decanting students onto it - couldn't believe my eyes. The girls with blazers looked as if they had no skirt on from the back, but these stretchy Lycra micro minis were very very common.

Not only do parents allow it, they will fight for their child right to wear a short skirt/skintight trousers - usually citing that that is what the have and they aren't buying another.

Our school has literally given up, mind.

I had one mother insist her daughter was wearing 'Asda school trousers' so it was fine. They were too small, they looked like they'd been sprayed on, and you could see her ankle bones. Yes, children grow, and occasionally you need to buy clothes mid-year if they do.

A few years ago, we were driving on a route that encompassed Marlborough College, and a girls SM just outside Salisbury.

In Marlborough, the girls were covered. Jumpers, knee length skirts. In Laverstock, skirts up their arses snogging the boys from their school. On the school wall.

In the big picture, while recognising all their difference, this was a visual example as to why we have a gulf of inequality.

Expectation.
Presentation.
Standards.

@ProfPickles

I'm female and work in a school and the girls in short skirts make me feel uncomfortable.

They're so short I see one of their bums every single day and these are children. I don't want to see the bums of children and girls wearing skirts so short that if you walk behind them up the stairs you can see up.

I feel like the boys uniforms present them as smart preparing for the work place (one argument made for a smart uniform) and the girls does them a disservice because mini skirts so short you can see bum cheeks every day isn't good enough. The women working there wouldn't be allowed to wear them so why are our girls seen as less important?

I'm always a bit confused when people stick up for girls wearing tiny skirts, it just seems like an obvious way girls are sexualised from a young age

I think the point is that notices to parents would be better to say short skirts are not appropriate for school, not specifically that they are distracting to male teachers and pupils. That way the focus is on wearing situationally appropriate clothing not on being responsible for regulating men's behaviour.

I don’t like to say this because women should be able to wear whatever they want without bad consequence but...

I loathe seeing girls in too short skirts, it makes me feel really uncomfortable and while I don’t like to say it, it does put them at additional risk.
Both from boys their own age and older.

My DS is secondary and I have overheard many a teenage boy conversation re girls and they often don’t speak about them at all respectfully.

The short skirt is an intentionally ‘sexual’ look, sorry but it is, it is designed to accentuate the legs and bum and I’m sorry to say, there are a large percentage of boys and revoltingly, grown men who will look at a girl in a mini skirt and perceive them to be ‘easy’, ‘asking for it’, ‘sluts’ etc etc etc.
It does put them at risk and I think it is naive think it doesn’t.

I wish it wasn’t that way, but it is.

‘Sexy’ looks like mini skirts, knee high socks etc have no place in a school.

What’s wrong with knee high socks? I always put them on dd as she struggles with tights

@Kteeb1

I think my problem is by saying short skirts make male teachers uncomfortable, rather than all teachers, it is sexulising them. Saying that a girl may be attacked because her skirt is short is both untrue and dangerous. As I said I have no issues with a uniform policy being enforced. I have just had a discussion with said child and confirmed this, and confirmed that I wouldn't be able to wear what I am wearing (an off the shoulder top) at work. But not because my male colleagues wouldn't be able to control themselves or I may get raped on the tube, but because its not professional. If I get raped on the tube its nothing to do with what I was wearing. Sarah Everard was wearing a coat and hat and gloves. It's a bad message to give our young people, boys and girls.

They don't necessarily get attacked but their images are used. Many many years ago, one of my then Year 10 students asked to speak to me as he had been really disturbed by something on the internet. He'd been on a porn site (yes we spoke about that at a different point) and was really upset to see pics of girls in their school uniforms waiting at the bus stop from the local girls schools. He knew they were just going about their business but because the skirts were so short they were being used for titillation on these sites. This is the example that I use with my girls now, this is not about making you look like a nun, but more about protecting you. Similar boys images (hot day either in PE kit or shirts unbury) are used in the same way. It isn't about sexism or sexualising teenagers, it is that some people will do things that we have no control over, so we should control our own circumstances so we can avoid it happening.

Btw I really don't want to see bum cheeks when teaching also I simply say it is a hygiene issue. They are putting their sweaty legs in exactly the same place as the previous student put their sweaty legs - skirts act as a good protector!!!

What’s wrong with knee high socks? I always put them on dd as she struggles with tights
The girls at DS school wear them with fanjo grazing short skirts and it is a famous ‘sexy’ look, google ‘sexy schoolgirl 🤮 costumes’ and it’s always the same formula - shirt with buttons undone, fanjo grazing skirt and knee length socks.
Entirely inappropriate and sexualised.

@Powertothepetal

My DS is secondary and I have overheard many a teenage boy conversation re girls and they often don’t speak about them at all respectfully.

Hopefully you pull them up on those comments every time?

*Unbury = unbuttoned

When these girls in tiny skirts and thongs sit down, don't their gussets come into contact with the seat? Gross.
Won't their skin get burnt or scratched if they sit on a bench on a hot day or a brick wall? Sounds uncomfortable to me. I like a bit of fabric to sit on personally.

Boys uniforms are smart. We never see boys pants or penises on display in schools so why is it ok for girls to be dressed inappropriately?
I remember that there was a phase in my school when many of the boys would wear their trousers with little to hold them up (such as a belt). Often meant an inch or so of boxers on display but in a couple of cases their buttocks were barely holding their trousers up. One of the lads took exception, said "I'm fed up with looking at that", and dealt a wedgie to one of the worst offenders to general amusement.

There is an all girls school nearby where the girls wear long tartan skirts well below the knee. From what I can gather it's the older girls who have to wear them and the lower forms wear plain skirts at the knee. They are very distinctive around town and I get the feeling that the girls are very happy to wear them. Though I wonder if they are a trip hazard when going up and down stairs.

I'm a grown woman. I've driven past girls going to school with skirts so short it's made me uncomfortable. I have no desire to see their underwear when walking behind them.

Our school uniform was knee length skirts.

When I had a job at uni , women could wear trousers or skirts. The uniform was provided. Skirts had to sit just below the knee.

It's not difficult.

One of the lads took exception, said "I'm fed up with looking at that", and dealt a wedgie to one of the worst offenders to general amusement.

Wouldn't it be good if a girl from each school with flesh on show would do the same?

@PolkadotSloth it's what pretty much all the girls at our local secondary school wear. It's not so bad in winter when they combine it with opaque tights, but in summer you see a lot more than seems necessary driving though town and pick up.

It's one of the reasons I really don't get school uniform. I grew up overseas, and without a uniform left to our own devices we all wore jeans. From what I can tell that's still what kids overseas wear, and it seems a lot easier than perpetual arguments over skirt length.