To embrace being pale!

[Boo2012]

Hi all, I'm very fair and freckle. Ginger/Strawberry blonde. I have been tanned in the past. Mainly when I was younger from the sun. But I'm more careful now I'm older. I've tried fake tan but I'm not great at it plus I have eczema so it doesn't all agree with me.

Anyway, like I said I'm trying to be much more careful in the sun. When I was younger I was guilty of getting burnt. I've never been a sun worshipper who sits in it all day though. But I've been sunburnt a fair few times.

My own mother is exactly that - a sun worshipper. She just sits in it for hours and puts oil on to burn. No good for anyone but that's her choice.

I seen my mum recently. I had some shorts on. She told me that my legs were too white for it and I should tan them up before wearing shorts again. Aibu to think that's really bleddy rude? It takes a lot of confidence for me to wear a pair of shorts as it is as not so skinny since having dc.

I agree a tan looks incredible but aibu to think people should embrace pale too? Particularly those fair headed people like me who are more at risk of the sun rays. My mum is naturally much darker skinned than me anyway. I don't know where I get the ginger gene from tbh.

So yes aibu to embrace the pale? And just think bugger it I'm going to go out with shorts and pale legs. It's so hot here! 😒

I don't have enough time to sit in the sun (with suncream) to even get a slight tan. I'm just not a fan of sitting around in it.

YANBU. I think it's shocking for anyone to shame someone else for having pale skin. Whatever your skin colour or shade, it's perfect just the way it is.

I've never had the urge to lie in the sun to get a tan, never mind a tanning bed. It's an addiction for some people, and their unnatural excessive tans make them look much older than if they'd just stay their natural colour. It looks so unhealthy. Ironic, since it's supposed to be a "healthy tan".

[quote PawsQueen]@VladmirsPoutine I've had abuse shouted at me in the street when I've been wearing shorts/skirts, told I need to get out in the sun, I need to fake tan etc etc etc
I'm a redhead, it's just my skin colour![/quote]
Yep. I don’t think people understand that some people genuinely, truly, can not and do not tan. It wouldn’t matter how long I sat out in the sun - my skin’s reaction is to burn and freckle. Tanning is not in my DNA.

Once had an idiot colleague tell me contemptuously (after returning to the office after a holiday), “sorry but you look exactly the same as when you left”. As if I’d been losing sleep over the fact that I hadn’t tanned.

Ok. I agree it's completely out of order. I'm Black/Mixed. And growing up and even across the world white skin is seen as the ideal so it really comes as a bit of a shock to hear that actually your paleness was mocked. I'm mixed, and half african - where I'm from skin lightening agents are a million-dollar business. Sorry I'm just so perplexed by this.

I’m very pale and dark haired and it was always (negatively) commented on, so I didn’t like it and would use fake tan. I’ve always stayed out of the sun though. My daughter is blonde and even paler and she embraces it.

@VladmirsPoutine it's bonkers. It's worse if I'm with the other side of the family (my great great grandad was black, mums side are dark olive skin and black hair)

@VladmirsPoutine

Ok. I agree it's completely out of order. I'm Black/Mixed. And growing up and even across the world white skin is seen as the ideal so it really comes as a bit of a shock to hear that actually your paleness was mocked. I'm mixed, and half african - where I'm from skin lightening agents are a million-dollar business. Sorry I'm just so perplexed by this.

It tends to only happen with legs. No one has commented on my arms or face before. It’s an insult saved only for legs. I think these idiots think that pale people’s paleness should not extend to their legs for some reason

My mum used to say this to me too. I am blonde with very pale white/pink skin. I never tan - never have - just doesn't happen. in the sun I go red and then white again.

I used to tell my mum if she wanted to me to be tanned she should of considered marrying a cuban. It was a bit of a long running joke in my family.

I embrace the white. who cares. I can be an English rose and i'll have great skin when i am older

@VladmirsPoutine

Excuse my ignorance but do really pale people suffer from some sort of shame for being pale? Really?

You do get comments about it allll the time.

I'm Scottish and have the less-recognised version of Celtic colouring - born strawberry blonde, but now have dark hair and lashes/brows, green/blue eyes and very white skin.

I burn ridiculously easily and, although I can tan eventually (given very incremental exposure and careful use of 'Factor Dufflecoat' sunblock), it fades quickly and my natural colouring is basically pale blue.

I embrace it. Can't be bothered with fake tan and don't really want to risk skin cancer.

I have already had "why don't you try fake tan" twice this year from different people. I wouldn't suggest someone bleach their skin.

@MedusasBadHairDay

YANBU

I'm probably biased, as I have pale pale skin (which was a blessing as a goth teen) which doesn't tan easily, and I'm quite happy with it. My DD is the same, though DS tans even in winter.

I think there's nothing wrong with pale skin at all, and I'll show off my pale white legs even if I do risk blinding people with the light reflecting off them

Same here! :D we didn't choose the goth life, the goth life chose us!

I'm very pale. Fake tans look ridiculous. I embrace my light skin now, even though I still get comments. At 61 I tell people to fuck off.

I'm sorry and now I'm trying to understand but as a kid (my father is white) I recall very early on wondering why I didn't have his skin colour and really wanting blonde hair too. To hear that that sort of skin is also mocked is really a bit odd to me. It really is. So then if you're that pale there's no tanning for you lot - you basically go from white to red. So what do you do in Summer?

@GoingQuietlyInsane I was mocked for having a pale face, so it does happen just probably not as common and being mocked for having pale legs

@VladmirsPoutine

Excuse my ignorance but do really pale people suffer from some sort of shame for being pale? Really?

Yes, it's not seen as attractive as having a tan. That's why fake tan/tanning beds are so popular. Nicola Roberts from Girls Aloud used to get called "the ugly one" of the band as a pale redhead, her bandmates with tans were seen as more attractive.

Yanbu OP every skin colour is beautiful and there’s nothing wrong with being pale! It’s so rude when people say you need to get some colour, you look unhealthy etc. I am also very pale, fair hair and blue eyes so I’m dependent on factor 50, hats and sunglasses to protect myself. I’ve never used fake tan and I’ve given up on foundation because I’ve never found one pale enough. Who cares, I like my skin

@VladmirsPoutine

I'm sorry and now I'm trying to understand but as a kid (my father is white) I recall very early on wondering why I didn't have his skin colour and really wanting blonde hair too. To hear that that sort of skin is also mocked is really a bit odd to me. It really is. So then if you're that pale there's no tanning for you lot - you basically go from white to red. So what do you do in Summer?

In summer I have to wear sun cream (factor 30 minimum) if I'm going to be outdoors. I try to wear long skirts to cover my legs rather than shorts etc to keep my skin out the sun and I try to sit or stand in the shade as much as possible. I take a vitamin D supplement year round as I can't get much from the sun.

@Isseys4xmastintslecats, I dont understand your even in Tenerife comment?! It gets bloody hot even in winter in the Canaries and yes you can burn on an overcast day there too. If you had said Tenby in the winter I'd if got you.

Of course you should embrace pale OP, especially for health reasons. Absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about.

I've never understood the problem with pale skin or "pasty" legs. Pale skin is beautiful. Your skin is your skin. No need to change it.
I'm mixed race and tan very easily and quickly if I'm out in the sun. I prefer my lighter natural skin tone 🤷‍♀️
Sun damage on any shade looks awful anyway.

I embrace my skin colour. I’m pale as a ghost. I used to love trying to tan but ever since my mums had skin cancer twice now I avoid the sun. I will wear fake tan on a night out sometimes but most of the time it’s tanned nights or bare legs.

@VladmirsPoutine

I'm sorry and now I'm trying to understand but as a kid (my father is white) I recall very early on wondering why I didn't have his skin colour and really wanting blonde hair too. To hear that that sort of skin is also mocked is really a bit odd to me. It really is. So then if you're that pale there's no tanning for you lot - you basically go from white to red. So what do you do in Summer?

In the Summer, most of us have to cover up.

I come from Irish parents and we've had the "Pale and pasty" comments all our lives, just as many of our relatives have.

I eventually tend to tan if I'm on holiday for example, but my sisters could burn just by reading a weather forecast.

@VladmirsPoutine

I'm sorry and now I'm trying to understand but as a kid (my father is white) I recall very early on wondering why I didn't have his skin colour and really wanting blonde hair too. To hear that that sort of skin is also mocked is really a bit odd to me. It really is. So then if you're that pale there's no tanning for you lot - you basically go from white to red. So what do you do in Summer?

I go white to red to slightly beige if I'm lucky. I mostly slather on the spf!

To hear that that sort of skin is also mocked is really a bit odd to me. It really is.

95% of people I met for the first time as a child would comment on it “God you’re so pale!” “Aren’t you pale?!” “Have you had your blood checked for anaemia?” It honestly gave me a complex (I have 3 siblings who go golden in the sun). The few times I’ve been in the sun for long periods I’ve burnt. Now I put plenty of sunscreen on in summer and wear a cap so my nose doesn’t go like Rudolf’s.

I take vitamin d as I'm deficient and avoid the sun basically
Wear SPF on my face anyway as use retinol . My arms occasionally go a shade darker and I get freckles but otherwise I just burn then go back to white

It tends to only happen with legs. No one has commented on my arms or face before. It’s an insult saved only for legs. I think these idiots think that pale people’s paleness should not extend to their legs for some reason

Not true at all in my experience.

'Pale and pasty' definitely extends to the face and just about everywhere really.