To be disheartened DS is now aware of comments on his size.

[GreenCrayon]

DS is 18 months old and quite little. For context he has only just gone into some 9-12 month stuff, but still fits easily into most 6-9 month clothing and even some 3-6 stuff. He has tiny feet and there isn't much to him weight wise. He is just on the lower end of the centile charts and that's fine by me, after all someone has to be there.

I'm well used to comments about his size and normally brush them off as small talk but today after 3 separate parents continually steered the conversation around his size and how small he was DS started to repeat them and say the word 'mall' whilst pointing to himself in the same way he says cup and points to a cup.

I appreciate he is indeed small but I was sort of hoping he wouldn't yet be aware or make the link that when people said small they were referring to him. Am I unreasonable to be sad he's made the connection and wish people would stop commenting on his size.

My twins were exactly the same.

It never occurred to me to be bothered. They were small. They got bigger. They’re totally average at 12.

Their little brother was a fat little bugger but at 9 he’s a streak of skinny muscle but the shortest boy in class.

I agree with @sadperson16 tbh. It doesn’t sound normal to be upset about this. As others have said, he is small, smaller compared to grown ups!

My almost 8 year old is still in 5-6 year clothes. She's always been small. It was more noticeable when she was younger like yours so people would comment then (although it never bothered me). People don't really comment now as it's not so striking even though I know myself she's still short for her actual age. So it will stop most probably.

I would rather that people didn't comment that she's shy, on the other hand. It doesn't massively bother me but when someone says that I'll always reply with you're not shy really. I just don't want that label on her and her to start believing that because someone's said it to her so it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. But there's not a lot you can do about this stuff

I hate this. I have two babies in my family who are cousins and the mother of the large child won't stop making comments about her child's size. Both kids have short parents but one baby is way bigger than average. Whoop Dee Doo.

Honestly it gets very tiring and I'm just here to hand hold. People are annoying.

Are you very small OP?

Or your partner?

Honestly it gets very tiring and I'm just here to hand hold. People are annoying.

Thanks for the handhold it's actually quite reassuring to know the constant comments would get on other peoples nerves too.

Neither myself or my partner are short. I'm average height for a women and my partner is over 6 foot.

I would rather that people didn't comment that she's shy, on the other hand.

I totally agree. As you've said it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy that the more they hear it the more they think that's what they should be. I'm sure she's absolutely isn't shy at all, sometimes I think people forget not everyone is outgoing and keen to talk to anyone.

It’s not pure projection though. Obviously at this age he’s unlikely to make much of these comments but the kind of person who makes them is unlikely to decide to stop when he gets a bit older. Friends with smaller DC have had comments made about them right through to adulthood. You don’t like it happening now (quite rightly) but it’s not just about now is it? He is getting more aware and verbal by the day and at some point he WILL start to take it on board.

People suck.

I will say fewer people comment on it generally as they get older but as you say, some children have to be smaller and some larger, that's how averages work. My eldest is small in all directions, 5th centile for height and weight, she is smaller than half the children in classes 2 years below her. The only time we've had comments in the last year was an age related activity where you had to be over 6, she's 9 but they wouldn't believe me at all.

My youngest on the other hand is 6 and 75th centile for height, but 1st centile for weight. He does get comments sometimes but he just says his daddy is the runt of the family (at 6ft 2") so he's just trying to make sure he gets bigger than his uncles (all 6ft 4-6") - it is a nightmare trying to buy him clothes though, he's still comfortably an age 2-3 at most on the waist, but age 7-8 in height.

Neither of them are bothered by the comments because they both know they are small/skinny but they also know they're fast, bendy, strong, great at reading, kind etc as these are the things they're praised on so so far they seem quite confident in who they are.

I always had the opposite mine was 6ft at 13 years old he's 14 now and size 11 feet. Always been big. He has some tiny friends I'm almost sad he's so big compared to them. Always gets treated older than he is even when people know his age.

Just build up resilience and positive body image. I tell my son how healthy and strong his body is when he eats nutritious food. I tell him how tall and strong he will be when he grows up. I tell him he has smooth, healthy skin that is protected from the sun when I put sunscreen on him. Also strong, healthy teeth when I brush them. Obviously not all the time, but I try to build him up mentally to love his body.