Constant need to buy stuff is getting me down

[zoomzoom68]

I seem to need an endless stream of stuff and it’s starting to get me down.

Just a few examples of things I’ve bought this week:

• Tent to take baby on beach for our upcoming holiday to protect him from the sun (£30)
• Five colourful plant pots for plants that a friend dropped off unexpectedly (£15)
• Cool bag, again for upcoming holiday (£15)
• Decorations for baby’s upcoming 1st birthday (£15)
• New chopping board for kitchen as old one finally broke (£10)

I know these things sound like one offs, but it seems to be every week that I need something unexpected like this. Does anyone else find the same?

I’m also trying to sell some old baby stuff including a carrycot, but have had no takers on FB or Schpock. Not sure where else to try?

It just feels like we slave away to make enough money and then spend it on an endless stream of stuff... and on and on it goes!

zoomzoom68 I think you have answered your own question about why your old baby stuff wont sell. People would rather buy new because it is easier/quicker/tempting to get stuff delivered from Amazon.

Not the point, but water will dry out your wooden chopping boards as well as make them mouldy – you should oil your boards and spoons so they’ll last forever. Not olive oil; mineral. Yes, buying the oil is another purchase but your chopping board will last f o r e v e r like a Mumsnet chicken.

@zoomzoom68

Parasol, hat and blanket

I don’t have a parasol either! Beach tent is still eligible for return so I could do that and get a parasol. I just thought the tent would be easier with the baby?

The plants were in small pots but will grow rapidly so needed repotting.

The tent will be handy! Also the coolbag you can use for years. The plants, bit annoying that they were thrust on you (probably would have gone in my garden waste bin). The chopping board again should last years, pretty essential. The decorations, are for you not baby, nice to have though!

@GnomeDePlume

zoomzoom68 I think you have answered your own question about why your old baby stuff wont sell. People would rather buy new because it is easier/quicker/tempting to get stuff delivered from Amazon.

Also second hand stuff can be crap, ending up buying new anyway as a bit missing/falls apart etc

I wouldn't take a baby on the beach for more than an hour. Buggy and parasol suitable for that.
Plant pots. Unnecessary. If they need repotting put them out or bin them.
Cool bag. They are pretty shit. I wouldn't bother. Supermarket variety probably works just as well and much cheaper.

• Decorations for baby’s upcoming 1st birthday - now you are just having a laugh surely?
• New chopping board for kitchen as old one finally broke. Completely acceptable.

It never stops and gets worse especially with the summer holidays, even trips to the park cost a little.
Hand downs are your friend with babies, people gave me lots of clothes up until DS was 2 before he'd outgrew the older DC.
The tent is a good idea imo, store it for next year.

I think it's silly that posters and critiquing what the OP has bought and how they aren't essentials. Surely the OP's point is that money can just fritter away very quickly, whether that's on a baby beach tent, or heated curlers that someone "needs".

I'm not going to judge what OP has "wasted" her money on because I recently bought myself a few new summer dresses when I didn't need them. I'm sure a lot of us can just as easily spend money on things that aren't essential. And this is not aimed at the seriously frugal posters here (although it appears there are many!).

OP, I completely understand where you're coming from. There are some shops I need to avoid such as Boots because I always come out with several items when I only needed one!

It never stops and gets worse especially with the summer holidays, even trips to the park cost a little.

Well, no. It's not it that doesn't stop, it's us who keep buying stuff. All those bright flowerpots, beach tent, birthday decorations and what not aren't buying themselves, OP actively makes a choice when buying them.

Why the need to blame something from the outside, that mythical "it" instead of looking at out own shopping behaviour.

even trips to the park cost a little
Struggling to see how. Sun-tan lotion, perhaps. Big sun hat. But those are two things you’d need anyway.

My kids used the beach hut thing loads, in the garden and in the house in bad weather, to make a fort, a pretend house, a school, all sorts. Then we gave it away to the neighbours. So it was money well spent.

I've had the same cool bags for well over 20 years, still going strong, same bricks to freeze, too, done countless picnics and outings in them.

Deccies - I went for spend more to keep longer and got custom bunting with each child's name (they now hang these up in their rooms) and then a cloth Happy Birthday one to wheel out every year.

Is a one year old going to happily sit in a tent on the beach?

Mine didn't

Return that pronto

@qualitygirl

How long are you going to the beach for? Babies don't last all day on the beach! What age is baby? Does the buggy not have a hood to get cover from the sun? I have had two dc and never had a tent...we live by the sea.

Did the plants not come in pots??

I think the key words in this post are "we live by the sea". Presumably if your kids got grumpy or tired or the weather got too hot or there was a quick rainshower, you'd go home because you lived nearby? And you knew there was always the next day and the next, and the week after, and the month after that that you could return? Well, if you go to the seaside once a year for a week, you want to make the most of it. So if you can park your little one in a nice shady/sheltered tent for a little rest, then when they're refreshed or the rain has stopped, you can go back on the sand, you can make the most of your very few days on the beach. We spent eight hours on the beach one day last week with our 6 year old, with our beach tent - when he was chilly from the sea (which wasn't warm!) he warmed up wrapped in a towel in the tent, we got changed in there, we left the towels and clothes zipped up in there with our water bottles, snacks and the cool bag while we all went rockpooling - when he was little he'd nap in there too. Then at the weekend we had it up in the garden.

I’m not saying the tent is a bad idea! I just said you didn’t have to have one.

None of this is essential. You could have easily got all of these things cheaper / free / second hand. So yes YABU

You’ve posted two threads today about spending too much money OP? What are you hoping for? As begging threads go, they’re not really pulling at the heartstrings tbh

@SilverGlassHare that's what we do too. When you only get 3 or 4 days at the beach all year you tend to make the most of them.

Just came back to the thread and can't believe it's 12 pages!

Chopping board, never urgent. I use a plate more often than not anyway because it goes in the dishwasher more easily.

@DirectionsForUse There's no way I could chop veg on a plate! It would be so noisy for one thing, and I would feel like I was going to break the plate! Especially when chopping something hard like a butternut squash.

It can though get very hot inside far too hot to sit in and definitely not suitable to put a baby in

@Lillyhatesjaz The one I've got has ventilation panels at the back I believe, so you can get a breeze through!

For a lot of things Amazon will only stock higher priced items.

Pretty much everything I buy is cheaper on Amazon.

It is really very hard to sell second hand baby things.

Oh no - I was hoping to make a bit of cash on a few things!

I think as another poster said, a lot of this comes down to being more organised. I tend to leave everything untill the last minute, then panic and buy on Amazon because it's so quick!

Are you wondering why you can't afford to buy a house?

@2bazookas I already own a house - bought it 7 years ago!

Sounds like quite normal small expenses. And I am frugal. Seems to me OP is giving herself a hard time (which begs the question why. Who else is involved). Or she is truly making herself unhappy with her purchases. Why? Maybe because she really doesn't want or need them. If that is the case why are you buying them? What is the driver? To feel better, safer. To feel loved. Just some thoughts.

Some interesting food for thought there, thanks @AllWashedOut. The word "Safer" hit a nerve with me. I like the feeling of being prepared for all eventualities I guess.....

I would buy a lot of the same stuff, but would never have the gall to go and complain about my luxury spends when there are so many people even in this country and certainly in much of the world who couldn't spend any of this.

@OverTheRubicon To be fair if everyone posting on Mumsnet applied that rationale, then Mumsnet wouldn't exist! Also I wouldn't class a chopping board as a luxury spend TBH. It's hardly a Gucci handbag!

There's no way I could chop veg on a plate! confused It would be so noisy for one thing, and I would feel like I was going to break the plate! Especially when chopping something hard like a butternut squash.

I agree with you there, I only use a plate instead of a chopping board if I’m cutting up something soft like strawberries. The knives will go blunt faster if you’re using plates as chopping boards, and the knives are more likely to slip while you’re cutting if you’re using a plate.
It also just doesn’t feel like it’s good for the plates - and incidentally, your chopping board was cheaper than replacing one of our plates would be. They’re admittedly expensive plates, but they should last for decades as long as we don’t start dropping them.

Thought of this thread while making some purchases! Normally my dd, age 16 cleans her own room but I did it today, along with changing the bed. Ended up buying 4 new pillows and a duvet for her plus some ant chaffing shorts for my other daughter.🤷‍♀️ All seem essential to me.

I just popped out. Half a tank of petrol, catfood, calpol and cheese. Just normal, tesco cheap brand Cheddar. £50 gone. It's just life. Nothing special there at all. This thread is a bit like the first lockdown with people furiously arguing what was and wasn't essential.