Brace yourselves

[Husbandno1]

NC as this may be a controversial topic....

My wife and I are having a ‘lively discussion’ about breastfeeding. There appears to be mixed evidence online. So we thought we would ask this community and see what others thought.
What age do most people stop breastfeeding their child at?
(I have suggested a year btw)
YABU - a year is way too early, children need that boob for ages to come!
YANBU - we/I stopped breastfeeding my child at a year (or under)

Stopped at 5 months. My choice.

Obviously when mum wants to stop. She has given up her body for an entire pregnancy and nurtured her child through its first months by breast feeding. She gets to decide when to stop (and I jolly hope you are being supportive)

I managed 16 weeks with all of mine. Far too long, I should have stopped sooner!

How long children need breast milk and how long society has conditioned women to breastfeed are two entirely different questions.

Ultimately, the breastfeeding relationship exists solely between mother and child and the duration is entirely decided by the breastfeeding dyad.

The question is confused - you’re asking when women stop on average - but then you move to asking when they ‘should’ stop.

The answer to the first is some women never do, some breast feed for a couple years. A quick Google will give you the Uk average.

The answer to the second is there is no should - it’s what works for you. If you want to know health guidance NHS or WHO sites will tell you that, but keep in mind that health guidance acknowledges that some women cannot or don’t want to breast feed and in a country with a clean water supply formula feeding is not a huge issue.

And by the way - it’s up to your wife what she does, not you.

we/I stopped breastfeeding my child at a year (or under)

The only “we” in breastfeeding is the mother and child.

It's very much upto mum and baby

Actually I’ve got to say you are getting a bit of a roasting on here but at least you are clearly open to being told you are wrong, so for this I applaud you. Take the advice you asked for, and let your wife know you support her 100% in her BF journey for as long as she wants to do it.

Wow!
This was way more heated than I anticipated.
Thanks for (some of) your sensible and measured responses.

The reason I suggested a year was that she plans on going back to work after a year, and both financial and practically it might not be possible for her not to work after a year.
We (yes both of us) were actually wondering what others did because it’s our first kid and there is mixed things online to read. Thanks for the resources people have posted.
Some of our friends have breast fed up to five years and others have suggested the baby only needs it up to 6 months. Although the ones that did breastfeed for longer were SAHMs
Anyway, thanks for your collective input.

What are your issues with bf continuing past 1 year? Genuinely?

Sounds like your dw is happy to continue, it should be her choice. And no one can force a dc to bf if they don't want to.

WHO recommends a MIMIMUM of 2 years.

Natural age of weaning would be between 2.5 years and 7 years.

Whenever mum is ready. The recommendation is for 2 years minimum but our society isn't set up for that for various reasons. Dd1 I fed for a year, dd2 2.5y and still going strong, dd3 4 months so far. Plan to feed both little ones until they're ready to stop but I'm very lucky to have that option. If I suddenly decide for whatever reason I want to stop tomorrow I will and anyone who judges me for that can fuck off (although I think the girls would have strong feelings about it!), similarly anyone who judges me if I'm still feeding them at 5 is a dick

Cross posted, you can go back to work and continue to bf. And if dc is a year old, you don't even need to worry about bottles or expressing.

Does she want to go back to work? What did you discuss before she got pregnant? Does she want to feed for more than a year?

@Husbandno1 I breastfed mine to age 2 and 4 and went back to work after a year. They don't need it during the day once they're over 12 months. On nursery days they breastfed morning and night and I fed on demand on my days off (it gradually reduced to morning and night on those days too). Breastfeeding a 12 months and older child is much different to feeding a younger baby.

I'm not voting because there isn't an arbitrary time when it's right to stop. I did 18 months and then 2 years. I didn't feel comfortable feeding in public after a year.
Both times I stopped when I was ready, the babies would have kept going!

Still feeding just at night, mainly she asks if she wants comfort/help to get to sleep, my dp never even mentions it 🤷🏻‍♀️My Dd is 3 in July, I’d like to be coming to the end by then

I was breastfed till I was 4

Some countries breastfeed up to 7.

Personally I couldn’t care less when someone stops doing it. Whatever they feel comfortable doing. Not what others think. I think it’s strange when children who are 9 or so who do it. I’ve only evert seen that once. It was on the news

If you were asking me personally. I’d say up to 4. But that’s my own personal opinion.

How long a woman breastfeeds her baby has got nothing to do with anyone other than the woman doing the breastfeeding.

I breastfed my first approximately 18 months, second until just over 3 years and the third until just over 3.5 years.

At no point did I discuss it with my then husband, or anyone else come to that.

It was entirely my decision to breastfeed and entirely my decision how long it continued.

@Husbandno1 I went back to work at 10 months and still breastfed until 16 months.

After 12 months they can have cows milk in the day. But it’s still beneficial (and entirely doable) for them to have e.g. a morning and a bedtime breastfeed.

I'm stopped day feeds at 3 mths as had to return to work & stopped night feeds somewhere about 6-7mths when baby started sleeping through. It depends on alot of factors... if mother is happy to continue, doesn't work outside home & has time, mom has enough milk to keep baby satisfied (can be more difficult as they grow)...lots of things. I would say there is no right or wrong time, depends on individual circumstances.

Thanks for (some of) your sensible and measured responses.

Pat on the head for the well-behaved ladies.

A very small amount of Googling would tell you many FT working mothers BF past a year. Toddlers aren't babies and can eat food during the day and have milk morning, evening and night.

Tbh it was my decision when to stop each time

I wanted to add. Like the majority it’s nothing to do with the father.

As someone once pointed out to my friends husband

You get an opinion. You don’t get a choice.

OP I’m a health care professional in a busy speciality that includes many out of hours shifts and I am still breastfeeding beyond a year. You don’t have to stop just because you return to work. Supply beyond about 3 months doesn’t work like that - it’s generally very stable and milk is produced when required. Baby doesn’t need to constantly keep feeding to maintain supply. We are absolutely fine with 2 feeds a day alongside meals and water.

As a guy you don’t get a vote. Your wife should breastfeed as long as she is happy to do so.