How much did your 16yo spend on their prom dress?

[SpongebobNoPants]

I have no idea how much these dresses cost but we’ve been asked to pay £500 towards SD’s prom outfit which seems really excessive?
Her dress alone is £500

When DP expressed some surprise (and announce to be honest) at the cost he was told everyone spends that much?
Are we just old and out of the loop or is this excessive?

I would have detested dressing up formally and attending a school prom. I was hanging out with students from our local art school and living my adult life by the time I left school.

Indeed the class of 2021 might well be facing the same scenario. Let's hope not eh. It would be nice if they could have a bit of joy after all the crap.

£35 from ASOS, plus £50 for shoes and bag, plus hair.

However, DD was firmly the odd one out. Most of them were wearing £500+ dresses and arrived in hire cars (and a couple of helicopters). We dropped her off in our very boring family car (which was clean-ish).

Quite honestly, it's an absolute racket for what is basically a school disco.

Anyway, there absolutely should have been a discussion about costs and expectations before shopping but that's more to do with co-parenting relationships than the price tag.

DD1's was £550 last year. Never got to wear it.
Dd2's this year was £40.

£500 is utterly ridiculous! When I was 16 my parents gave me £100 towards my entire outfit and I think £50 towards hiring a limo. So grateful that our parents humoured us at the time but looking back I cringe. We all looked ridiculous dressed up in ballgowns.

@SunshineSum

If she’d have given us more notice even it wouldn’t be so bad,

Your SD leaving school and attending prom is a surprise to you?

OP means notice of the cost of the dress, not the existence of the prom. I think you knew that really though , didn’t you.

It should have been discussed with you beforehand, how much you would each contribute, then SD could have been given a budget , ie you have £400 in total, but that has to buy dress, shoes, bag, hair, nails, tan/transport/whatever. It would have been a good life lesson for her too.

Some people go way over the top with these things. Most of my friends bought their DD's lovely dresses anywhere between £50 and £100 depending on their budget.

I feel sorry for the local 2020 prom kids too. They were promised that their prom would happen at some point but it never did.

It’s not just the dresses, I spent a fortune on ds1 suit and transport a couple of years ago. Was hoping that ds2 prom would be cancelled this year but no the school are going ahead and now asking for deposits for the hotel. I told ds2 if he wasn’t worried about going he could have £200 instead which he is chuffed with. No way was I spending a fortune on a prom that could be cancelled, I am still gutted I spent hundred on a suit for ds1 prom that he only wore for a few hours.

Most kids I speak to are more interested in the after party than the actual prom anyway!

£20 on depop so far, as she's not convinced she wants to go and I'm far from convinced it will happen, as it would require the planned June 21 relaxing actually happening. If it gets delayed by a couple of weeks, or some restrictions on large gatherings put on hold, it won't.

Mine was 12 years ago and I remember spending £100 for a dress off eBay. Even that I thought was excessive. I paid for half of it with birthday money I'd saved up so my parents ended up spending £50 towards it.

I can't imagine inflation has hit so hard in 12 years that £500 is standard for a prom dress now! There are definitely very nice dresses for far less even now. I don't think it'll be difficult to find a nice prom dress for around and under the £100 mark.

£500 is not a rare/unusual amount to spend but it doesn't matter what anyone else spends. What matters is your SD's relationship with her dad - especially in this pandemic year when her dad is getting remarried
She has a lovely relationship with her dad but it is not based on how he much he spends on her surely? Money doesn’t = love. He gives them whatever he can but we can’t shit money!

Also it’s not remarried, it’s just married. I’ve been in their lives a long time. The wedding is also being predominantly funded by my mum (kindly and generously) so it’s not like we’re sitting on a stack of savings that we won’t share with SD. She also knows this by the way, but perhaps her DM doesn’t but it’s none of her business anyway

My dd's was from the Ever Pretty range on Amazon, gorgeous and about £40?

WellLarDeDar Sat 05-Jun-21 15:31:10
We all looked ridiculous dressed up in ballgowns.

I think you will find very few seniors attending proms wear "ball gowns".

Times have changed.

@speakout well lar de dar.

I know a girl who spent £350 and the dress was ruined by the end of the night. We spent £70.

D1's prom dress was £17 in Debenhams, 3 years ago. A few of them got together and did their own hair and makeup, which was all part of the fun. I think £500 is an insane amount to spend, as pp have said, I didn't spend that on my wedding dress.

@Bagamoyo1 I admit a bit of deliberate obtuseness but most Y11 girls start planning prom outfits and arrangements months in advance, and parents certainly know it's coming up (or, this year, that it's pencilled in) so have plenty of time to think about it. Sounds like in this case the dad hasn't cottoned on that he might need to work out budget/arrangements etc with less than a month to go.

Whatever you end up paying l, you need to tell mum that you're not paying for extras like hair, nails, makeup etc which can run into 100s too. 200 for everything is a reasonable contribution imo

@Soontobe60

DD1 didn’t have a prom - they didn’t exist in 2003! Dd2 bought her dress from Topshop in the sale - cost £30, wasn’t a ‘bridesmaid’ prom dress, just a lovely mini dress that she wore loads afterwards. Didn’t have fake tan, fake nails, MUA or hairdresser. IMO she stood out as being the most beautiful one at the prom, and I was so proud of her.

I left school in 2001 and had a prom. Dress was £160 but already had the shoes and did my hair and makeup myself.

Dress was £400
Shoes ,hair etc another £200
It’s a special occasion

Dress was £55 which was my birthday present for my parents. Hair £25 I paid for myself. Nails, make up etc I did myself at home. Jewellery I borrowed from my mum and shoes were ones I already had.

I've never spent that much on item of clotbing

*any item

DD prom 2019, dress; which was actually a bridesmaid dress, was £190 but alterations and some diamanté bits sewn on added another £100. Borrowed a bag, New Look shoes £24, spray tan, nails and hair (friend did makeup for a bottle of Prosecco) plus prom ticket, added up to around £400. No limo as her dad dropped her off and picked her up!
However, it was worth every penny as she looked absolutely stunning and she loved the whole experience.

Macncheeseballs 4
I've never spent that much on item of clotbing

Me neither- but does that matter?
My DD was going through a pair of dance shoes every 2 weeks aged 17- at £80 a pop.
I don't think I have ever paid that for any shoes either!