How much did your 16yo spend on their prom dress?

[SpongebobNoPants]

I have no idea how much these dresses cost but we’ve been asked to pay £500 towards SD’s prom outfit which seems really excessive?
Her dress alone is £500

When DP expressed some surprise (and announce to be honest) at the cost he was told everyone spends that much?
Are we just old and out of the loop or is this excessive?

£100 from monsoon.
The majority of girls get theirs from Quiz

@singsingbluesilver

The whole prom thing has gone crazy. I honestly think it is time for it to come to an end. There are so many kids who are miserable because they cannot compete with all of the crazy spending - and they are under so much pressure to 'fit in'.

My dd had a dress from ebay that cost under £20. She looked amazing. However we both a have a very practical approach to these things. She also is very eco aware so embraces the chance to reuse and recycle. She also attended a school with a lot of peers who felt the same. Even so, there were some in her year griup who spent well into the £100s. Crazy.

Prom has become a huge business - dresses, suits, hair, make up, limos, even helicopters!!! It is a distraction to many in the months when they should be focused on exams. Just get rid of it. Best to have a ceremony of achievement and let the kids sort out their own celebration with their circle of friends.

How are you going to "get rid of it?!" It's not organised by schools themselves everywhere at the moment. At DDs' school students organise it and that would probably happen everywhere if schools didn't.

We had a 6th form ball in a hotel at the end of the year after we had done our a levels. It was great because we could drink lol, I couldn't imagine doing it at 16 though.
This was in 2003, my dress cost about £60 from Debenhams and I thought that was expensive lol

Dress £30 and £10 to have it altered to fit perfectly.
Shoes £30.
Car was a friends.
I did her hair.

I'm a teacher and I've seen so much money spent. Dresses, suits, shoes, transport etc etc. The best dress was a £10 from TK Maxx that the student added some bits too. It was amazing!! £1k is more than I spent on my dress, extras, hair and make up combined. I won't be spending £500 on my daughter and her prom outfit.

Our school has put an end to the limo nonsense. A coach is put on, price included in the tickets. Thank god.

I do hate competitive penny pinching on this thread though - it can get a bit Four Yorkshire Men which is nearly as grating as the The Only Way is Essex types

It's utterly bizarre.
A secondary school life spent wearing polyester blazers and rolled up skirts to ensure everyone is the "same" and then this ridiculous event at the end of it that is on the whole supported by schools.

At some point somebody sensible will say "come in jeans and a t-shirt and we start a charity fund with the money that would otherwise have been spent on hair, nails and limos."

I just hope nobody who spends this sort of money has ever complained about the cost of a branded acrylic Jersey.

School here charged £25 for leavers hoodies, names on the back, class of 2021

Last day they insisted business wear, smart trousers, shirt and tie, when most aren’t going to 6th form, had already brought hoodies and had uniforms!!

Utter joke.

@Crystal90567

Hair £90 plus £40 on day Makeup £50 Shoes £50 Other £50 Hair accessories £30 Photography £150 Dress £550 as I said Total 1k

I'm not rich but it was well worth it. It's a rite of passage and I dont want her to miss out. I never bothered with Michael Kors handbags for school or latest iPhones for school, which is part of same topic really, but I did do this and I'm glad of it.

How ridiculous

Is it normal to spend huge amounts now? 500 for a prom dress seems barmy to me My prom was in 2004 and my dress was 70 quid I think from Debenhams and I thought that was a lot (there wasn't any Asos etc. then so harder to find cheap formal dresses). One of my friends got her dress in the Monsoon sale £50 and a couple got them from charity shops (£10-20). We all shared a taxi and we did our own hair and makeup. I guess its ramped up a bit in the last couple decades.

Not a thing at all in my yoof though we did have school dances and aged 15-18 everyone wore what they had and a bit more makeup.

DC had nothing aged 16 though there was a leavers' dance two years later. Some parents got very competitive.

I think it's all materialistic crap and hits those with little money hardest. If you can find £1000 to spend @GorgeousNightingale then wouldn't it be better put towards travel or something your DD would really want to do later apart from a one night only thing?

I have 3 DS’s and 2 have had proms, I’ve watched the arrival of all the youngsters at either the venue or the school and the they all looked fabulous. The girls looked like Hollywood A listers at the Oscars. It was so beautiful to watch that I even went the inbetween year when I didn’t have a DC going to the prom that year.

Is it normal to spend huge amounts now?

If you've read through the thread, you'd have found the answer to this.

My daughter had a lovely dress from EBay ( think it came from China) for £35, it was a short 50’s/60’s style with a big lace underskirt. She bought a nice pair of shoes, borrowed some costume jewellery that had been her Nan’s that went perfectly with the style of dress, did her own hair and makeup, and I took her to the prom. Similar story for most of the others.
Lovely pictures were taken , that we bought after.

You really don’t have to spend a fortune to make a statement!

@Belladonna12 a valid question as to how to get rid of it. The one I think would work without a ban would be that no school that has such an event can be rated 'outstanding' by Ofsted. Otherwise, add something to the next Education Act, to stop them on school premises or in any way supported by the school.

Not that I expect an Old Etonian would ban or restrict such obscene profligacy.

My prom was in the USA, in the 90's. I've lived overseas for 20 years now though and just as an observation of the US version vs the UK:

In the USA, the class/ year group does fundraising activities throughout their time in high school. Those funds (at my school) were for a combination of large events: prom, a bit of homecoming, and for the future high school reunion (put in a fund by the school). This is how they manage to hold large, lavish events such as prom. Ours (well-off suburb of Washington DC) hired a large old art gallery in a trendy part of town and had significant expenditure for a band/ DJ/ decorations/ photo booth/ whatever other shite. The after prom party was on a steamboat on the Potomac river, with a casino for gambling fake money. And on top of that, tickets were something like 50 bucks per couple.

I don't know of many/ any schools local to us in the Midlands holding anything like a US prom. I'm sure they exist elsewhere. but that isn't the point. I feel like TV shows have helped to import the excess of attending but not the actual event of the prom. Which is a shame, because I'm also one of those "I paid 50 bucks for my dress and it was perfectly fine" sorts.

@SpongebobNoPants

£500 is just the dress... she wants make up, shoes, hair, nails, accessories (bag, jewellery etc) So it’ll be closer to £700

That is a really obscene amount. Totally ridiculous. The fact you’re offering £200 is already very generous. Don’t be strong-armed into paying more.

Children of that age shouldn’t be spending that sum of money, especially on just a dress. They have no idea of the value of money as they have not started earning. Spending that sort of amount just gives them the wrong message.

Dd prom is this month. So far we have spent:
£100 on dress plus £40 for alterations.
£7.50 on shoes (debenhams when closing were selling shoes bogof, 2 pairs were reduced to a total of £15).
Handbag £25
Hair will be £15 plus some pretty styling pieces.
Make up she will do herself.
Car is her best friends relatives so free although her brothers both went to their proms in our car, I don't get the posh car thing.
Both her brothers had a new suit and shoes each which came to around £150 so she has done brilliantly to keep it in our budget.

@winnieanddaisy

We went shopping yesterday with my DD and DGD for her prom dress . She loved a gorgeous pink and gold ballgown costing £469 . She did try on a few cheaper ones (£260) but they didn't look as lovely on . Her parents and I went half each so she could have the one she wanted . DGD has bought her shoes herself. Her mum will pay for her hair and makeup and she has paid for her nails herself . Meanwhile other 16 year old DGD in Wales has only requested £40 for her dress !

So are you not spending the same amount on your GDs? Not a criticism....a genuine question. Personally, I could spend £235 on one but only £40 on the other....no matter how much the dress is? I always treat mine equally.

Could not

@SwimBaby

I have 3 DS’s and 2 have had proms, I’ve watched the arrival of all the youngsters at either the venue or the school and the they all looked fabulous. The girls looked like Hollywood A listers at the Oscars. It was so beautiful to watch that I even went the inbetween year when I didn’t have a DC going to the prom that year.

Did they look wonderful because they were wearing expensive outfits? Or was it more to do with the fact that they were a group of happy, confident young people beaming with joy and excited to celebrate together?

DD £65 from a vintage dress shop.

£500 just for the dress is bonkers. For one night. At 16.

You could get a dress made couldn’t you? My sister ended up doing this for her (spoiled) middle daughter after she ordered some dress online and it looked terrible in real life. The made one was a lot better.

@Kitkat151

So are you not spending the same amount on your GDs?
Not a criticism....a genuine question.
Personally, I could spend £235 on one but only £40 on the other....no matter how much the dress is? I always treat mine equally.

Equal does not mean the same.

Did they look wonderful because they were wearing expensive outfits? Or was it more
to do with the fact that they were a group of happy, confident young people beaming with joy and excited to celebrate together?

The latter, I suspect