to get annoyed at the divide of the so called "regular mumsnetters"and the "newbies" ???

[3missyshohoho]

Forgive me if this has been a topic of discussion in the past but following on from a recent thread in the for sale section of MN I was wondering what others thought about this.

It makes me so cross on the for sale board saying "will only sell to or prefer to sell to regular MN" I can understand they don't want any funny business as there has been the odd scammer on here ripping people off, but it puts newer members off asking anything in fear that they will get shunned! And even if you haven't just joined - when is it exactly does one become a "regular" MN?

I have come on here daily for approx 7 months now.... Although I haven't posted on all of the talk boards I have certainly posted on a few in the past and often browse topics similar to ones I may be experienceing at the present for advice. I mainly buy off the for sale board and have sold a couple of bits as well.

I feel there is to much cliqiness amongst the "regulars" which puts off some mums from ever posting.

Sarah x

Wot fio said

If I were selling I would do a search on the name of any MNer who tried to buy from me to see if they had 'been around' for a while or had just appeared in the last hour or two.

It's got nothing to do with being a "newbie".

Ok, yes I can understand that but if you aren't sure of a person you can easily look up what posts they have been on and see if that person has bought or sold before. It is your choice to decide to buy....

Thanks for replying.

Sarah x

these newbies can be feisty can't they

Sorry just seen tiganas reply - reitterating her point!

..and the reason I would search is that just given by Fio.

If on ebay I would check their rating. No such regulation on MN board.

there have been some posters who only use the for sale boards, and nowhere else, and were causing problems, posting all over the board , posting the same items over and over, reselling stuff, and running a business, without paying any fees.

that is why people get cross, and would prefer to buy / sell to regulars.

why not sell on ebay, if that is all you use mumsnet for, i think .. this is a community of sorts , and regulars do not like to see it taken advantage of

sorry you feel that is cliquey

I think it can be intimidating for some mums to reply to any post if they are not seen to be a regular.... getting back to the cliqiness point.

Sarah x

Except that the OP is getting peeved about postings from poele that didnt even use regular in that sense, and tried bloody ahrd to explain they emant poeple who exclusively use the For sale boards without straying into MN proper- no time served meaning at all

So YANBU about the use of the term regulat

But YABU as you didnt really read the posts and just got stressy.

So is this about people not wanting to sell to a new MNer or to some who only uses the for sale board, or is it about the general alleged cliquiness on MN as a whole?

It's no more cliquey than real life. If you go to a new toddler group it's intimidating to have to speak to anyone.

"I think it can be intimidating for some mums to reply to any post if they are not seen to be a regular.... getting back to the cliqiness point".

But if you don't post, how do you become a regular?

i am confused

OP , are you upset about not being able to post on the boards or just the for sale thing?

sometimes, you just have to dive in and get stuck into posting and not worry too much about oldies/ newbies and that sort of thing..

Point taken on board. I quite frankly have sold probably 90% of my stuff on ebay, and only a handful amount of stuff on here. I agree that perhaps there should be regulated feedback system but remember it was the MN who asked for a for sale board so why is it that we should have ebay on-line as the only resource to sell things on...

you got to put the time in and not have a life. these newbies...i dont know...want cake and eat it tut tut

I've posted on for sale to reg mners only and stated my reasons here

because I am offering at cheaper than eBay prices to people who use a website that supports parents
IMO tis not a site for people to buy and sell on, but the sale boards are for users to offer things to other users, but of late that's rather gone by the wayside...
true tis only my personal opinion but as this is an open website I am lucky I am entitled to it

actually does not excude newbies but I will search and if a person only hangs here for buying and selling then I'd rather eBay thanks...

I believe this is the thread that started all this?

Intimidating to the for sale peeps- poor OP got a barracking and did nowt wrong!!!

I am reasonably new here. I have posted on various threads and have never felt unwelcome or felt there is undue "cliquiness".

I know that mumsnet is not real life, but what I have tried to do is accept that I need to get to know these "new friends". Just like in real life the mnetters that have been on here longer have their "in jokes" and understandably get a bit fed up when "newer" people dive straight in, often with odd/provocative comments or even whole threads. I lurked for a while first, then joined in on some threads. I have only started one or two I think. Imo it's not always the best plan to leap straight in and then complain when no one responds or if the do they assume you are a troll.

Even as a "newbie" I can fully understand why other mnetters get irritated. Common examples are people starting the oh so original threads about p&t parking for example, or moaning about others' little eccentricities. Just hang out on here for a week or two and you will easily see who is who and what subjects have been done to death.If you do a quick search you may find your original ideas weren't so original after all.

Btw I love mumsnet (apart from it taking up so much of my time.) Have had some fantastic "chats" with people and it makes very interesting reading as well. I am learning so much.

Agree with soup and fio. It is not about newbies and everything about the For Sale boards.

I suppose you get what you want out of mn. I lurked for a while before posting. If you post on a thread, you are helping some other mother (or father). Or get to debate a point. Or have a query answered by the collective wisdom.

Shame that you have to feel intimidated from posting. It's just words ...

tigana, I know when you first join everyone seems to know everyone, but then you just stop giving two hoots and answer what you want, any thread you post on, if you make a valid point that ahsn't already been covered you are likely to be answered.
I still don't know how long you have to be here to be a 'regular' I feel like I've been here forever (although had a recent name change) but I bet most of the posters who have bene here longer still think of me as a newbie!

Missy who said you shouldn't sell? We just asked that people also stray into MN proper.

Which you said you did anyhow- so not an issue surely????

Thread going to fast for me to catch up!

My point is the cliqiness and if someone was to sell something on the for sale board and state - would prefer to sell to a reg - what do I do, ask her permission if I can buy it, am I deemed a regular?

"The For sale topic is intended for Mumsnet members to sell used or unwanted goods."

You see, for me, "mumsnet member" means someone who contributes to the site (talk) as a whole. Not just someone setting up a virtual trestle table at a nearly new sale. That's what I call a "regular", someone that contributes to the whole site, however infrequently or new they are.