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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Tell me your funny IL tales

222 replies

Frankola · 01/06/2021 20:48

Sometimes I really can't help but think that my DHs family are genuinely insane 😂

My SIL is currently playing a game of "hide the wedding date".

So the story here is that she has booked her wedding. Announced this on Facebook (obviously). And asked my DH, her brother, to be a part of the groomsmen.

DH said lovely, yes and asked what date the wedding was. She is genuinely, honestly, no word of a lie refusing to tell him?!!!

How can he agree to a date he doesn't know? Why would she hide this?! 😂

It's almost as funny as them turning up to our wedding with a full tin foil packed picnic as they didn't know if a hotel venue booked for the entire day would provide food? 😒

Or the time that my DH hurt his back back was bed bound for a week. His mum and sister turned up and took over the house. Insisting on doing everything for DH and in turn insisting I do everything for them! This ended up with them telling everyone who'd listen that they had to "come to help care" for DH, making out I did nothing for him in that time. Well obviously I didn't when they made it so I was relegated to waiting on THEM hand and foot instead!

Do I have the strangest ILs? Please say it isn't so?!

OP posts:
Dugi3 · 01/06/2021 22:53

My charming MIL moved her table place setting at our wedding whilst we were having our photographs taken to sit right beside my DH, clung on to his arm throughout his speech making under breath shrugs of disagreement when he dare compliment me. It was only then that I noticed she had the cheek to move her place! The disgust on her face was so bad throughout the day that our photographer suggested she be cut out.....she doesnt feature in our album happily!
Side note...she took all the wine supplied by us off everyone elses table, full bottles at the end of the meal, brought them to the dance room and got so drunk she tried it on with the best man, in her head I guess she was dancing like beyonce, in reality it was a car crash

pasbeaucoupdegendarme · 01/06/2021 23:01

Mine has just offloaded onto DH and I several boxes of food for our use. (She is moving house and can’t put food in storage.) The most recent expiry date is 2017. This is modern by quite a long shot. The oldest item has an expiry date of 1989.

BecauseMyRingBurnsSheila · 01/06/2021 23:05

My in laws only give me regifted presents. They have some very wealthy friends who buy quite individual stuff for them, which then gets regifted to me. Think vase which matches their dinner service. Or a hamper full of their favourite foods. I even got a box in which the 'to ILs love from wealthy friends' message was still tucked into the packaging! Thank heavens for Ebay because I use the money from that to buy myself something I actually want.

I am a devil though because FIL brought round my recent birthday gift and I almost gave the game away by going to store it in my 'resale' shelf (which is blatantly that). I remembered he was actually in my house and I popped it on the table next to the shelf instead 🙈

Yokey · 01/06/2021 23:11

@pasbeaucoupdegendarme

Mine has just offloaded onto DH and I several boxes of food for our use. (She is moving house and can’t put food in storage.) The most recent expiry date is 2017. This is modern by quite a long shot. The oldest item has an expiry date of 1989.
Oh yes, snap! My MIL cant bear to throw anything out whether it's expired food or spare fridge bulbs that don't fit anyone's fridge. She dumps them on us so they're not wasted. I, of course, promptly throw them in the bin.
Sweetpeasaremadeofcheese · 01/06/2021 23:16

We were renting their little unit when we first got married.
When I was at work my MIL let herself in, collected a bunch of my stuff (including personal papers and diaries) and just took them away. I guess she felt I had too much stuff. They also said my sister who escaped an abusive situation couldn't stay with us temporarily as it would could more wear and tear on their property.
My husband says that when they were children they weren't allowed to walk down the middle of the hallway, as that was too wearing on the carpet. They had to walk on the sides.

ImInStealthMode · 01/06/2021 23:16

Are we related OP? My (ex) in-laws also brought foil wrapped sandwiches to our wedding! WTF?

Happy to say that my new DP's family, or at least those of whom I've met in person so far, seem far more normal.

Noidea2114 · 01/06/2021 23:24

The first time she came to babysit our DS in her bag was a side plate, cup, saucer, knife, fork, spoon, sandwich,
flask of tea, milk in a Tupperware container, sugar in another, cake and a packet of crisps. And don't forget the
serviettes.
When he was christened we were having a buffet at home. She sent 12 large M&S pork pies, 12 slices of tongue
and 24 M&S french fancies (cakes). And all she ate was half a pork pie and one french fancy.
Never kissed the DGC. I could tell you more things.
She died last year and we still laugh at her funny ways.
My mum used to say why didn't I get offended. I wasn't going to change her so why stress myself.

Cocolapew · 01/06/2021 23:37

Mil cried really loudly at our wedding and said she would have preferred it to be her sons funeral.
She wore white to the wedding and threw a tantrum when I turned up in pink.
She disappeared between the service and hotel, apparently to go home for her glasses.
She threw another tantrum when we hadn't stopped everything to wait for her. She was away for nearly 3 hours.
When we were on our honeymoon she went into our flat and rearranged everything. All rooms, cupboards, drawers, etc. She even moved our bed.
She also threw away any paper work that didn't have DHs name on it. It was my flat before I met him and I hadn't changed anything yet. I lost insurance papers, mortgage agreement etc.
She also moved my very dear to me and expensive Prince records to cupboards that had heating pipes going through them and turned the heating on full blast. In July. They were all warped.
This was only in a space of a few weeks.
I don't have time to put any more Grin

Lostandtired1 · 02/06/2021 00:03

When my DS was a baby and I was breastfeeding, myself and my DH had gone to the local pub for lunch and were sat outside (obviously I was not drinking) and MIL drove past and saw us, she stopped and asked what we was having to eat, I was having chili con carne. Later DS was a bit sicky/pukey after his feed DH was on phone with MIL and she said it was because I had had chili con carne to eat Hmm

When DS was three months old I caught her giving him chocolate buttons (he had not been weaned) and I told her stop- I still think to this day she thinks I’m an arsehole and could not understand the problem. She gave me all this advice when I’ve had two more children than her, she only had one. She told me to put sugar in his bottle if he was constipated and my older DS told me she gave baby DS Coca-Cola (he was about 6 months old).
Everything I ever did was wrong it just became laughable in the end Grin

Lostandtired1 · 02/06/2021 00:05

Oh she’s not an old MIL either so can’t blame it on a generational thing, she had DH aged 16.

UpHillandDownAle · 02/06/2021 00:10

My inlaws referred to me being rushed to another hospital by ambulance in a near death situation as a “magical half an hour” for my DH as he got to have our 2-hour-old baby to himself for the half an hour drive between hospitals following the ambulance.

FelicityBeedle · 02/06/2021 00:11

Went for a walk with my MIL and she expressed a worry that I was too good for her son and would get bored and leave him (flattering I suppose). She went on to say DP is a lot like his dad and she cheated on him a few years into their relationship, but he begged her back and she stayed. She always vents fo me and I don’t mind at all, but wtf do you do with that information!

SingingSands · 02/06/2021 00:25

@UpHillandDownAle

My inlaws referred to me being rushed to another hospital by ambulance in a near death situation as a “magical half an hour” for my DH as he got to have our 2-hour-old baby to himself for the half an hour drive between hospitals following the ambulance.

WTF?! Shock

Catflapkitkat · 02/06/2021 07:00

I am from the UK but living in my DH's country. First time I met her was for an award been given to my DH. His ex fiancé and her new husband had been invited and turned up just as it was starting. My MIL ran down the steps of the theatre and thew herself crying at this woman. At the awards dinner later in the evening, my MIL to be sat holding his ex fiancé's hand still crying much to the embarrassment of her new husband and I. Later on I discovered that MIL had been a pain in arse to the ex fiancé when she and DH were together.

Another was MIL meeting a colleague of my DH at our house warming party. She told us the colleague was a great girl (she is) and that she was the kind of local girl she hoped DH would have married as she would be a better match for him and HER. She told him to snap her up if she became available. DH's colleague is happily married with two kids and 20 years younger than him.

She has told me several times that 'no one can love my DH more than her' and the last time in front of our 14 year son, she turned to him and said 'not even you'

Last week she told me I was impolite for struggling with the language and people thought I was rude. She has lived in the same village for 50 years only moving 10 miles from where she grew up prior to that.

Original poster
Frankola · 02/06/2021 07:08

Wow. Some real classics here.

I know that all families are brought up differently etc but some of it is surely just batshit!

OP posts:
Original poster
Frankola · 02/06/2021 07:09

My SIL wore a white dress to my wedding come to think of it. A dress so short people actually commented to me and DH about it being inappropriate at the time.

I can't wait for her wedding Grin

OP posts:
MinnieMountain · 02/06/2021 07:33

PIL asked DH if I would like a garden clock for my 40th birthday 3 years ago. He said it’s not really my thing and suggested flowers instead. The clock duly arrived in the post (we’re in England, they’re in Spain). I left it in the shed as I really don’t like it. Every 6 months or so they would ask if it’s up yet, even offered to buy it off me. DH has finally put it up but there’s still no battery in it Smile

Lostandtired1 · 02/06/2021 08:20

Oh just remembered another! I’m 41 now but when I was in my 30s, MIL and her sister would often go any see the Bay City Rollers, I hardly knew who they were and I am a lifelong rock/metal fan. Couldn’t be less of my thing. Three times they got me a ticket to go with them and all their 50 year old friends, three times I had to say I didn’t want to go. Three times they bought me a load of tartan stuff to wear! Every time they were shocked I didn’t want to go and throw my knickers at these old men Grin wtf????

Cocolapew · 02/06/2021 08:33

@UpHillandDownAle

My inlaws referred to me being rushed to another hospital by ambulance in a near death situation as a “magical half an hour” for my DH as he got to have our 2-hour-old baby to himself for the half an hour drive between hospitals following the ambulance.
DD1 was on hospital when she was about 1, she was very poorly. MIL came to visit and sat down and said this is great, now we can all be together for a while, I hope she stays here for weeks. I got up and went to the toilet and MIL was gone by the time I got back. DH said he thought I would throw her out the window if he hadn't got rid of her.
FuzzyPuffling · 02/06/2021 08:35

Funny, or just snarky?

starfishmummy · 02/06/2021 08:48

It's almost as funny as them turning up to our wedding with a full tin foil packed picnic as they didn't know if a hotel venue booked for the entire day would provide food?

Perhaps they have been reading certain mumsnet wedding threads where food seems to be optional!!

Hollyhocksarenotmessy · 02/06/2021 08:50

I changed the plug on ex-mils hoover and she wouldn't plug it in in case it 'blew up'. It needed checking by a man first, you see.

Current mil is lovely but no brake between mouth and brain and blurts comments out at entirely random moments.

Mil *stares thoughtfully at my pasty white legs for a minute while everyone was chatting, then "You could try fake tan".

Mil stares at my mouth for a bit while everyone is chatting, then "Why didn't you have braces?"

Whenever she stares at a part of me, I know she's going to say something.

Luckily I find it funny.

Nietzschethehiker · 02/06/2021 09:12

Hired a bagpiper that she met in a taxi for Exdh and I's wedding. I didn't know anything about it until I arrived in the wedding car and was met by bagpiper music in front of the church (we are not Scottish, I'm Welsh and Exdh was a londoner).

In fairness it was definitely meant well. I mean later on she became batshit crazy when I had DC (well actually the batshit just came out...it was definitely already there).

To be fair it was effective in that it distracted everyone from the fact she wore Crocs and an anorak to our wedding (in all honesty I didn't care she was more than welcome to wear whatever she felt comfortable in but my somewhat social climber DM was horrified ...both as bad as each other those two).

Writing that out I probably shouldn't have been surprised the marriage failed really should I?

Nietzschethehiker · 02/06/2021 09:14

Also Exdh knew nothing about it either , he was in the Church and heard the music and commented someone must be having an event nearby with a bagpipe. Exmil piped (sorry couldn't resist) up that no it was the bagpiper she met in a taxi last week who was playing to greet me Grin Poor Exdh I wish I'd seen his face Grin

A2BviaCandD · 02/06/2021 09:26

When I was giving birth to our first child (her first grandchild), my MIL turned up in the room with a picnic basket and started offering sandwiches, sausage rolls, crisps, cakes and drinks around the room to my DH and all the staff in there. She was passing sandwiches over the top of me. The only one who didn't eat in that room was me.
When we had our second baby, I banned my husband from telling her I was in labour until we had the baby and were back on the ward.