To have demonstrated my absolute disdain and fury...

[MangosteenSoda]

... by signing off an email with just ‘Regards, Mango’.

Is it too much

Shit - is this for real? 😳

Is this yet another thing I never got the memo about?

I sign pretty much everything Regards

Occasionally just if I’m very peeved

@Velvian yes, pretty much

One of my colleagues signs of with a simple ‘Best’. I’m sure she’s aiming for full intimidation with her inscrutability. She also always opens with ‘Dear’ while everyone else is much less formal. It’s clearly psychological warfare!

Posted to soon

How would that be perceived by others?

I always sign off with best wishes. Regards is for people I am pissed off with. If I am really incensed then it would be nothing except my name and title. And I tend to get more and more overtly polite the crosser I get. So if you get an email from me thanking you for your very helpful suggestion which I will consider seriously, with no closing bit or signature, just my name and job title (and perhaps even all my qualifications listed) you will know that your head is definitely on the block.

@WarmSausageTea

I know the thread is lighthearted, but I pretty much always finish emails with ‘Regards’, the kind bit goes without saying, doesn’t it? And it always feels very old-fashioned.

I also don’t see the point in offering a ‘sincere’ apology - if it’s not sincere, why bother? Just make the apology and crack on.

I’m wondering how many people I’ve offended over the years.

offended, probably no one

but they might have wondered why you were so pissed off

'if you have any questions please contact me directly'

long hand for: if you reply all I'm going to have to drown you

Next time do ‘KR’ or just ‘best’

@MangosteenSoda I might be your colleague, I sign every email just "best" and start with "dear"!! I've done it since university. Now I'm wondering how many people I've offended!!!

Best,
Xiao

See now, when I read kindest/best regards I think that person perceives themselves as a Disney princess, scattering food for the birds, rose petals to the stars and the occasional long sleeve glove. I hate it. I don't need your Disney sprinkle. 'Regards', to me, has a more equal feel, a low-key, verging on cool but respectful adieu. Or have I generated many a sharp intake of breath with my callousness?

I really don't like when people just put BR with no comma or anything. Even "best" has four letters and is a real word!

"Regards" means I've had more than enough of your shit.

"Best" is even worse and means I hate your guts

I sign off all my emails "many thanks" to give the impression that I expect something from them even when I don't.

@Straysocks

See now, when I read kindest/best regards I think that person perceives themselves as a Disney princess, scattering food for the birds, rose petals to the stars and the occasional long sleeve glove. I hate it. I don't need your Disney sprinkle. 'Regards', to me, has a more equal feel, a low-key, verging on cool but respectful adieu. Or have I generated many a sharp intake of breath with my callousness?

KR makes you look like an arrogant knob

Kind regards or similar
are just normal conversation

Regards
when things start to escalate and you are pissed off. Translates as "fuck off" in most places.

Best
It's utter contempt towards the absolute belle-end.
Fuck you is not strong enough to cover it.

I go from
With kind regards to
Kind regards to
Regards to

N Tb
followed by the string of letters I have after my name. Think I've only pissed off enough to do that once. Probably the bank as I know more about their computer system than their 'advisors' do.

This is now making me want to go a bit left field. I might sign off my next email with LOL.

My DB fell out with our mum when she sent us a group text saying
Merry Christmas
Regards Mum

She didn't have a clue it was code for I hate you

I have gone nuclear this very morning and signed off simply ‘Best’, no adding my name but just my email signature below.

I am hoping the recipient will be in no doubt about my feelings when he opens it.

We have worked together for 15 years so I don’t think it will be lost on him.

@misspattylacosta I am making notes!

I hope you have calmed down a bit now OP.

I've been working with a new client who signs off 'Best'. I think it sounds funny followed by their name like they think they are the Best Dave out of all the Daves!

"As per the attached" is my absolute favourite 😁

Attach this next time, OP, so they feel the burn...

Let us know when you feel the need to resort to:

"Rgds Mango"

‘All good wishes’ is my go to euphemism for FU, but ‘regards’ comes close.

@MangosteenSoda do it 😂

I get really pissed off with my current client sending emails starting just "first name". I always do "Dear ..." or "Hi ..." in reply. It comes across from him as very rude and demanding my attention.

I'd be less offended if he just got to the text of the email, without any salutation at all! And he is only writing to me, so it isn't as if he needs to identify who the message is directed to.

Email sign offs translated. From www.verybritishproblems.com/

@WarmSausageTea

I know the thread is lighthearted, but I pretty much always finish emails with ‘Regards’, the kind bit goes without saying, doesn’t it? And it always feels very old-fashioned.

I also don’t see the point in offering a ‘sincere’ apology - if it’s not sincere, why bother? Just make the apology and crack on.

I’m wondering how many people I’ve offended over the years.

Prefacing emails with 'sincere apologies' has got me out of a few binds.