Page 5 | Not served alcohol with a meal.

GingerFreaker · 2021-05-25T16:57:57+00:00

I'm slightly miffed today. We went out to lunch. We being grandparents, myself and 19 year old grandson. We booked a table. We ordered a bottle of wine with our meal. They refused to give the strapping 19 year old a glass, because of challenge 25, and the twit did not take his driving licence. It stupidly "spoilt" a lovely long planned meet up. Since we can legally buy a 16 year old alcohol with a meal, am I right to be annoyed it was refused today? A pub chain, if it makes any difference.

DragonDoor · 25/05/2021 18:43

Is it possible this spoiled your meal because you don’t like being told you can’t have something? ( even though here, it’s was by proxy).

A 19 year old being asked for ID is pretty standard, no matter how ‘strapping’ someone is. I doubt your grandson was as fuming about this as you are, let it go.

ToadsThePeanutButterSnob · 25/05/2021 18:44

@GingerFreaker

My son may be 19, but he has high functioning autism. He does not drive. He does not go anywhere without me.

Please don't assume he's out hitting the town every weekend and knows the ropes. He's not. And a wallet is a red herring as he doesn't really need one. I pay for him. Unfortunately, it was in his other jacket.

But he was a cutely embarrassed, as was I, tbh, by the way he was spoken to. And having to deal with that, in public, can spoil what should be a pleasant meet up.

I'm confused. Is this person your son or your grandson?

You said he forgot his driving licence in the OP but now he doesn't drive . Which is it?

willstarttomorrow · 25/05/2021 18:44

He forgot his ID and somehow this is the pubs fault? When I was a teen we all knew the pubs that would let us in unchallenged but things have moved on. The pub risks severe prosecution these days so why would their livelihood? I got challenged at Aldi last year (aged 45- v obviously so and it was annoying) but I nipped in without my purse and was paying on my phone. They refused to serve me and went to my usual store and they laughed because 'obviously you are well over 25' 😁

Jobsharenightmare · 25/05/2021 18:44

They were doing their job. Why are you raising him to be upset that he can't drink at a family lunch? That it actually impacted on everyone's experience of the lunch seems odd to lots of us. What's embarrassing about getting ID'd at that age? It's very common unless you look about 30! He better get used to it.

Susie477 · 25/05/2021 18:44

You really are being completely ridiculous, OP.

His autism is irrelevant. What is relevant is that he couldn’t prove his age, so the staff were doing their jobs correctly by applying their employers’ ‘challenge 25’ policy.

Bluntness100 · 25/05/2021 18:45

@GingerFreaker

My son may be 19, but he has high functioning autism. He does not drive. He does not go anywhere without me.

Please don't assume he's out hitting the town every weekend and knows the ropes. He's not. And a wallet is a red herring as he doesn't really need one. I pay for him. Unfortunately, it was in his other jacket.

But he was a cutely embarrassed, as was I, tbh, by the way he was spoken to. And having to deal with that, in public, can spoil what should be a pleasant meet up.

Ok that’s a major drip feed op. And really not clear from your op where you call him a twit.

Librariesmakeshhhhappen · 25/05/2021 18:45

@ToadsThePeanutButterSnob

You can get a provisional license to use as ID, and never learn to drive. Or learn to drive, get a full license and never use it. What's so hard for you to understand about that?

Bluntness100 · 25/05/2021 18:47

I'm confused. Is this person your son or your grandson?You said he forgot his driving licence in the OP but now he doesn't drive confused. Which is it?

Oh thank goodness it’s not just me who is totally confused by this, I thought the op was the grandparent too. I don’t understand why he has a driving licence if he doesn’t go anywhere with out the op.

ToadsThePeanutButterSnob · 25/05/2021 18:47

[quote Librariesmakeshhhhappen]@ToadsThePeanutButterSnob

You can get a provisional license to use as ID, and never learn to drive. Or learn to drive, get a full license and never use it. What's so hard for you to understand about that?[/quote]
So why mention that he doesn't drive in that post then?

Inastatus · 25/05/2021 18:47

@GingerFreaker - jeez, nest of bloody vipers here today. Sorry you are getting such a hard time of it OP. I think it’s clear from your post that you were just mildly annoyed because you quite rightly thought it was within the law for your DS to have a glass of wine bought by you, with a meal. You did put quotes round the ‘it ruined the meal’ part suggesting that it just took the edge of it a bit, not that you are all raging alcoholics who can’t possible enjoy a meal without alcohol!

mindutopia · 25/05/2021 18:47

But he didn't have ID with him to prove his age. I've been denied a drink before (when a bit younger than I am now - currently 40) because I didn't have ID. It was my own silly fault for not having ID. For quite awhile, I didn't have a UK license because I am an immigrant and I didn't have rights to a UK driving license (my home country license no longer valid). I had to carry my passport everywhere instead and sometimes I forgot.

It sounds like he just needs valid ID and he needs to bring it with him (if his autism makes it difficult for him to remember it, just help him by reminding him). But the pub did the right thing.

Bluntness100 · 25/05/2021 18:48

[quote Librariesmakeshhhhappen]@ToadsThePeanutButterSnob

You can get a provisional license to use as ID, and never learn to drive. Or learn to drive, get a full license and never use it. What's so hard for you to understand about that?[/quote]
Why are you being so rude to the poster? You’d think she’d nicked your last penny then kicked you up the arse based on your reaction, not just asked a simple question.

SchrodingersImmigrant · 25/05/2021 18:48

.

Inastatus · 25/05/2021 18:48

Now your post is being combed through by forensics looking for the flaws 🤣

ToadsThePeanutButterSnob · 25/05/2021 18:48

@Bluntness100

I'm confused. Is this person your son or your grandson?You said he forgot his driving licence in the OP but now he doesn't drive confused. Which is it?

Oh thank goodness it’s not just me who is totally confused by this, I thought the op was the grandparent too. I don’t understand why he has a driving licence if he doesn’t go anywhere with out the op.

Never mind, I have read the OP again and it looks like the OP is the parent and she was saying she went out WITH the grandparents. I think...

QuimReaper · 25/05/2021 18:49

I still can't work out whether the whole table was refused or just the grandson, who now seems to have become OP's son...

Tartyflette · 25/05/2021 18:49

I kind of get why the OP is a bit miffed and felt the occasion was spoilt - it's the same when some people don't like to complain in a pub or restaurant if their meal or service is not up to scratch, especially if they are in a larger group and it's not just them plus partner.
Because many people get embarrassed by having to complain., (not us badass Mumsnetters, of course) it can often sour the atmosphere and possibly change the experience for the worse, and I can see that it might be similar in this situation.
Leaves a bit of a metaphorical bad taste in the mouth.
It's tough luck but bet the lad won't forget his ID again in a hurry.

Bluntness100 · 25/05/2021 18:50

Never mind, I have read the OP again and it looks like the OP is the parent and she was saying she went out WITH the grandparents. I think...

But you’d say “ we” being grandparents, myself and my 19 year old son. Not 19 year old grandson.

doadeer · 25/05/2021 18:51

I thought you could drink with a meal below 18, has this changed?

ToadsThePeanutButterSnob · 25/05/2021 18:51

As a side note, although it's technically legal for a 16 year old to have alcohol with a meal the restaurant can still refuse to sell them alcohol. Places will often have their own policies.

Spaceash · 25/05/2021 18:52

[quote Inastatus]@GingerFreaker - jeez, nest of bloody vipers here today. Sorry you are getting such a hard time of it OP. I think it’s clear from your post that you were just mildly annoyed because you quite rightly thought it was within the law for your DS to have a glass of wine bought by you, with a meal. You did put quotes round the ‘it ruined the meal’ part suggesting that it just took the edge of it a bit, not that you are all raging alcoholics who can’t possible enjoy a meal without alcohol![/quote]
It's so over the top here, I would be a bit miffed too :). Unless they thought he was 15 it's legal anyway.

ToadsThePeanutButterSnob · 25/05/2021 18:53

@doadeer

I thought you could drink with a meal below 18, has this changed?

In theory you can but some places will just refuse outright.

CoffeeCakey · 25/05/2021 18:53

But he was a cutely embarrassed, as was I, tbh, by the way he was spoken to. And having to deal with that, in public, can spoil what should be a pleasant meet up. how did they speak to you then? was it a really sorry but we need to see ID? Or a shouted OI ID NOW!

Overthebow · 25/05/2021 18:53

YABU. It’s their job on the line if they serve underage. It’s your sons fault for forgetting his ID

youvegottenminuteslynn · 25/05/2021 18:53

Because many people get embarrassed by having to complain., (not us badass Mumsnetters, of course) it can often sour the atmosphere and possibly change the experience for the worse, and I can see that it might be similar in this situation.

But why would they have needed to complain?!

He didn't bring his ID.

He looks under 25, the law is that anyone who looks under 25 to the staff member should be asked for ID.

He couldn't produce it therefore they couldn't serve him alcohol.

It's on him, I have no idea what complaint they could possibly have about the establishment?!