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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

My sibling was hidden from me for 25 years. AIBU

136 replies

Wedidntknow · 24/05/2021 22:35

Seven years before I was born my mother (early 30s at the time) gave birth to a baby who she gave up for adoption from birth. The baby was the result of a fling much like I was

Sadly, and it makes me sick to say this, the babies skin colour was a driving factor in her relinquishing him as from what I'm told my grandfather (now deceased) heavily dissaproved of her having a child of colour and had quite alot of influence.

I was raised as an only child and found out about my sibling by accident when I was 25. I asked my mother to sit down for a serious conversation about something totally unrelated and she thought I'd found out about my sibling - she rushed to defend her actions whilst I sat there gob smacked as I had absolutely no idea.

I managed to trace him via the adoption agency and now we are in one anothers lives. He had no idea about me either as she never bothered to send updates, give answers or provide any information for him at all.

AIBU to be angry that we were robbed of the opportunity to know the other existed?

Would you be?

OP posts:
lavenderandwisteria · 25/05/2021 10:44

I don’t want you to feel ashamed at all but you do seem to be posting less about your brother and more about wanting a pile on about your mum.

I am not implying anything, I’ve said exactly what I mean. My point is that you seem very stuck in a narrative of you as helpless teen and your mum as cold, knowing exactly what she’s doing. In actual fact, neither of those two stances are accurate but probably somewhere in the middle.

lavenderandwisteria · 25/05/2021 10:44

No one is attacking you about it. I’m certainly not. I am saying that I think your own circumstances are driving your reaction here.

SinisterBumFacedCat · 25/05/2021 10:52

I think your anger is entirely valid. The 80’s was not the 50’s. I was born in the 1970s and grew up in a estates which was 50% single parents, and there was no judgment. OP have you had any counselling in regards to your mother?

NinaMimi · 25/05/2021 11:02

I think you’re being very reasonable OP and despite showing a lot of understanding of adoption are still receiving unfair comments.

You can’t change the past. I hope you’re able to move on and have a healthy happy relationship with your brother. It’s great you’ve found each other.

PaperbackRider · 25/05/2021 11:10

It's not just about her though is it?

Well, yes, it was just about her. It was her life, not yours. Our parents don't owe us their pasts.

Blossomtoes · 25/05/2021 11:15

I was born in the 1970s and grew up in a estates which was 50% single parents, and there was no judgment

I completely believe the first part of that sentence, the second is nonsense. I was a single (divorced) parent in the late 70s. There was plenty of judgement, there’d have been a lot more if I’d never been married.

ifIwerenotanandroid · 25/05/2021 11:25

If you're still reading this, OP, I want to give you a virtual hug & applaud you for making things better for your own children than they were for you when you were growing up.

Sometimes the only gift our parents give us is their own bad example, which we avoid for the rest of our lives.

And some people on this thread should learn the lesson that there's a difference between experiencing a feeling (which we can't help & to which we're fully entitled) & expressing that feeling in our words & actions (which we need to control for our own good & the good of others). It seems to me the OP understands this but some people here don't.

ineedaholidaynow · 25/05/2021 11:37

@Blossomtoes I remember when I was in Primary School in the 70s the scandal when my best friend’s parents got divorced. And the even bigger scandal when the mum had a baby with her boyfriend. My mum even questioned whether I could still go to her house (although I think was partly down to the hippy boyfriend) but she was most definitely judged.

newnortherner111 · 25/05/2021 12:24

Yes I would be upset not to have found out sooner. Though your anger really should be towards your grandfather, even though his attitude would not have been a rarity.

SinisterBumFacedCat · 25/05/2021 13:36

Just unbelievable that the Op was accused of misogyny. On a thread asking for support. Shameful.

jacks11 · 25/05/2021 13:55

OP

I do not think you need to forgive or understand your mother in regards to her parenting of you/the way you were treated as a child, which sounds like it was neglectful and inadequate. Your resentment sounds like it is justified, but hope that have help to come to terms with it, as much as is possible.

Your situation with regards to your first child is tragic and I’m so sorry that happened to you. Again, I hope you have had/continue to have whatever support you need to come to terms (if that is the right phrase) with it.

I understand that you don’t blame your mother re the adoption of your brother, rather you resent that she did not tell you about him. If you’re angry, your feelings are valid- you feel how you feel. However, your feelings and wishes do not invalidate your mothers wishes either. I think, in this one regard, you perhaps judge unfairly. By all means resent your mother for being a poor parent, and maintain whatever degree or manner (if any) of relationship with her that brings you most peace and stability. But I do think you judge too harshly her decision not to tell you about your half brother).

I think it is entirely understandable that your mother would want to try and blot out /not acknowledge something that she probably finds very painful, quite possibly feels at least some degree of guilt about, and may well even be profoundly ashamed of, for a whole variety of reasons. Telling you about your brother- however understanding you might have been (was she to know that you would be?)- would mean thinking about it, talking about it, admitting what had happened and giving you information about what was most likely a difficult time in her life. It would be intensely difficult for most people to open up those wounds again. I can understand entirely why she would want to avoid doing so. I understand you have always been open about your son to your children. I know this is what is usually advised now. But it wasn’t necessarily the case when your brother was born. Your mum’s natural instinct to bury it was matched, by the sounds of it, by significant encouragement from her father who exerted a lot of influence over her decisions (according to you). Given her sisters advice, I imagine the wider family may also have preferred to “leave it in the past”. She had, therefore, lots of reasons not to be open with you. I’m not convinced your wish to know trumps her rights.

If I were to discover this about my mother, I genuinely do not think I’d feel aggrieved that she hadn’t told me. I think I’d feel profoundly sad that she had been in that position.

We have had similar in my own family. My aunt had a baby at 16, the decision was made that the baby would be adopted (not a decision that was entirely her own, she was strongly “encouraged”) and she was sent to relatives away from home to have the baby so that few people would know. Few people even within the family knew. I understand that it was many years into her marriage to my uncle before she told him. They did not tell their children. It was only when her first child tried to make contact (and stated they wound contact relatives via social media) that it came out. It was a very difficult time for my aunt, for whom the stress of the whole situation triggered significant mental health problems from which she has yet to recover. Very sad situation. I don’t for a single second sit in judgement of her decision. Nor do her children.

I suspect that, has she been a better mother and if you had a better relationship, that you might feel a little more understanding.

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