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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Nursery workers false accusation

141 replies

beecurtains · 21/05/2021 18:09

I've been sent a screenshot of a post from a local Facebook group posted by a lady who works at a nursery near us.

There's a photo of one of our relatives leaning on the fence outside of a kids park accusing him of being a paedophile hanging round watching and shouting over at the children. Relative had taken my DC out, he is in a wheelchair and can't get into the actual play area so would have watched them from behind the fence.

The post got a quite a few shares and 100's of comments calling him horrific names, people saying they will look out for him and making threats if they ever see him again. Shes liking and replying to all of these comments, asking people to share and warn other parents.

I dont want to tell him about this as he would be devastated but I'm worried hes now at risk and angry someone would post something like this about him.

WIBU to try and contact the nursery? Surely its a crime to publicly accuse someone like this with out any proof and especially bad considering her job?

OP posts:
ThatChristinaAguileraSong · 21/05/2021 19:35

Contact the admins of the page and don't ask them to delete it - ask them to EDIT it clarifying the situation. Deleting it only stops more people from seeing it, it won't change the opinion of anyone who has already seen it - an edit will be more visible. What she's done isn't a criminal offence but contact the police because the threats are - so contact the police. She's committed slander, a type of defamation, so she needs to make a post saying that she was mistaken.

Dancingpinkgini · 21/05/2021 19:35

Fucking hell. You need to screen shot it and contact the police now.

I would join the group, message all the admins and get them to take the post down ASAP and make a post to apologise.

I’d also message the nursery and send them screenshots of the post.

She needs to be dealt with by the police.

GlitterBicuits · 21/05/2021 19:36

Screenshot it and report the nursery to Ofsted

AntiSocialDistancer · 21/05/2021 19:36

@EmeraldShamrock

She is endangering his life. I'd phone the police.
Completely agree, I would call 101 an a more savvy Facebook friend too.
AntiSocialDistancer · 21/05/2021 19:37

@ThatChristinaAguileraSong

Contact the admins of the page and don't ask them to delete it - ask them to EDIT it clarifying the situation. Deleting it only stops more people from seeing it, it won't change the opinion of anyone who has already seen it - an edit will be more visible. What she's done isn't a criminal offence but contact the police because the threats are - so contact the police. She's committed slander, a type of defamation, so she needs to make a post saying that she was mistaken.
Admins can't edit members' posts.
Moonshine11 · 21/05/2021 19:38

As others have said;
Screenshot everything, every single comment.
Ring the police
Get in touch with nursery
Contacts the group admins

Chloemol · 21/05/2021 19:39

Screen grab it, then to be honest I would report it to the police now, ask them to go and see her and tell her to take it down

Then Monday I would speak to the nursery and tell them what she did, that you got the police involved and want to make a formal complaint against her

babbaloushka · 21/05/2021 19:40

That's appalling, get as much evidence, contact the nursery and as above use buzzwords to do with discrimination and libel, so the seriousness is conveyed.

ArchbishopOfBanterbury · 21/05/2021 19:46

I'd private message the lady directly and tell her what you've said, then ask her to take down the post.

(I'd be tempted to screenshot it first!)

ArchbishopOfBanterbury · 21/05/2021 19:48

Admins can't edit members posts, but you can post/tag the commenters afterwards. I wouldn't include her photos though, as they'd show his face.

toocold54 · 21/05/2021 19:50

Are you allowed to post the group on here incase anyone is a member and can comment underneath.

toffeebutterpopcorn · 21/05/2021 19:50

@ThatIsMyPotato

Screenshot and send it to the police. Tell her what you wrote here. IMO it is not enough for her to delete it she should write an apology and retract her accusation.
That’s what I would do. Dear god what is she thinking? I would also contact the head of the nursery too. She sounds a bit dim. I wonder why she would do this rather than speak to him if she thought he was loitering with intent (the staff at the nursery where I worked would do this) or call the police. I wonder if she has a personal grudge (maybe she spoke to him and he told her to get lost).
Ickythefirebobby · 21/05/2021 19:52

You need to report this to the Police. They will go and speak with your relative and do a risk assessment on him and his property. They may also put a panic alarm in his property. They will also deal with the nursery worker. Please don’t just leave it. Your relative is now at risk of harm.

ShamrockHillz · 21/05/2021 19:55

Screen shot everything ASAP, before it gets taken down. Then take it all to the police and they will take it from there. I wouldn’t let her get away with this as it’s very dangerous. It’s very easy for people to whip themselves into a frenzy and take matters into their own hands, especially on facebook. As your relative is in a wheelchair it’s even more dangerous for them. This could easily get out of hand if it’s not stopped.

IARTNS · 21/05/2021 19:59

Bloody hell your poor relative. Please contact the police.

As a side note, I'm surprised the admins allowed this. Our local page took down a post recently about a convicted peadophile.

MadeForThis · 21/05/2021 19:59

Report to the police. Before the Facebook group.
I would also report to the nursery too.

omgthepain · 21/05/2021 20:01

I would firstly call the police, report this to offstead (guessing its a registered nursery) and let them deal with the nursery but your poor relative that's awful

omgthepain · 21/05/2021 20:02

I would let the police deal with the nursery

Thesagacontinues · 21/05/2021 20:02

I'm so angry for your relative Angry

Agree that the post needs to be edited not deletef. If admin cant do it then the person that wrote it needs to.

I would contact the police and the employer too.

Staffy1 · 21/05/2021 20:04

Contact thé police, never mind the nursery, and also put your own post on the local Facebook post with the true story and demand she apologise. All as soon as possible before a pile of idiots share it.

Gazelda · 21/05/2021 20:05

This is disability hate crime. I'd imagine the police will take it very seriously, as should her employer.

Badpicknic · 21/05/2021 20:07

If this was my family member that women would be getting reported to the police

cabbageking · 21/05/2021 20:10

Don't engage or post any other versions.

Show it to the nursery and seek advice from a solicitor for libel/ defamaton which is a civil offence and not police actionable.

AwaAnBileYerHeid · 21/05/2021 20:18

Contact both the nursery and the police. This is a crime, he could be targeted by vigilantes. And comment on the post saying what you've said here.

ColumbiaAGroupie · 21/05/2021 20:21

This is absolutely shocking, I am so angry on your behalf.

I would do as many pp have suggested, call the police and contact the nursery.