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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Am curious .. do have any unreasonable bias ? ? ? . .. I know that I do and I am not proud😂

456 replies

Tiddleypoms · 13/05/2021 19:46

I think that we all try to be reasonable and non judgemental. However, I do think we can be labelling and bias at times. I was just discussing in private,with dh , my own pet peeve. He was quite taken aback .. he never judges , is mostly fair . Its made me wonder if many of us have quiet little unreasonable ( and are aware of ) thoughts and judgements .. ?! Meant to be light hearted.😂

OP posts:
Shinyandnew5708 · 13/05/2021 23:17

@Bringminimoons [hoiks already stretched judgy pants up to armpits]

Andante57 · 13/05/2021 23:18

tends to judge super rich people without even knowing them

Op any particular super rich people, op?

Cas112 · 13/05/2021 23:18

People who let cats on kitchen tables, kitchen sides, near plates when they are eating etc ... omg feeling of utter disgust inside and I just can’t help it Blush

duodunical · 13/05/2021 23:19

I'm surprised by how many people can't spell does when it only has 4 letters. They write dose over and over again.

I judge them because you don't need to be a good speller to know it just looks wrong.

waterlego · 13/05/2021 23:19

@HahaAreyouSerious I don’t know why you went to the trouble of registering just so you can post on a site you hate 😕

I’ve been here for 13 years on and off. I like it!

TaraR2020 · 13/05/2021 23:21

@Cas112

People who let cats on kitchen tables, kitchen sides, near plates when they are eating etc ... omg feeling of utter disgust inside and I just can’t help it Blush
People who put plates or bowls on the floor after eating to allow their dogs to lick them clean Confused

(Ducking for cover!)

Tiddleypoms · 13/05/2021 23:21

Andante57 yes .. why ? 😀

OP posts:
HahaAreyouSerious · 13/05/2021 23:22

@waterlego I'm not sure why you felt the need to falsely claim I'd just registered to post this.
My opinion is as valid as yours and I'm glad you've enjoyed your 13 years here.

Cas112 · 13/05/2021 23:22

people who drinking fizzy drinks first thing in a morning as well BlushBlush

FrozenVag · 13/05/2021 23:27

People who don’t like coffee or tea or any hot drink are total deviants. There’s something highly suspicious shoot those types !

waterlego · 13/05/2021 23:28

Thank you @HahaAreyouSerious.

My apologies for the ‘false claim’. I didn’t search your name. I made an assumption based on the notion that posting on a forum one does not like would be an unusual thing to do. Your opinion is indeed valid. 💐

Biffsboys · 13/05/2021 23:28

People who have bad table manners .
People who smoke while walking in the street .

DumbestBlonde · 13/05/2021 23:35

My judgementalism has primarily been limited to my experiences in the horsey world; those who treat their horse like a motorbike basically - from expecting to show up and the horse be tacked up and ready and they hop on and off they go, and the reverse when they come back. People who don't generally look after their horses well - left in a stable all day, with making sure that enough hay, water, skipped out etc etc (let alone the whole keeping them in when not necessary). Coming to a yard and behaving in a rude and entitled manner (and all ages do this, from teenagers, to grannies), not trying to work with the situation they are coming into, especially wrt horses needing to get to know one another, and some general rules that are in place (usually influenced strongly by me, I must admit).
Basically, people who have horses when they shouldn't - and that includes a dear- but very spoilt - friend of mine who, in a wheelchair and no upper body strength, persuaded her parents to buy her a pony and trap and then expected others to undertake care and risk their own lives and hers - and the pony's - while her blasted parents just sat back and humoured her.
(And yes, there was a danger to life when her very heavy wheelchair almost upended the trap with my friend trying to get it going, which in turn, nearly lifted the pony off the ground. It was never tried again.)

I also judge use of language, eating in the street (unless chips at the coast) - and spelling, although the latter, less so these days due to voice apps and autocorrect and - no editing! (I type on my laptop in low light and often make stupid mistakes I didn't spot until submitted....)

All of that said, I know that I am judged in many many ways - including for being judgemental and "looking down my nose" at people (sigh). By and large though, my own criticisms usually connected with horses, animals, general rules of life (safety, littering etc.) and unkindness.

Oh, and I also judge the Mormon branch of my family - for being Mormons.

DasPepe · 13/05/2021 23:35

I have a few around food, and use of cutlery is one of them.

People who hold their knife and fork in a convoluted, unergonomic way: with fingers wrapped around the handle like vines.
It doesn’t affect me in any way: but I don’t understand how it can be comfortable or useful!

Tiddleandplonk · 13/05/2021 23:36

This is awful, but i judge people who just give their kids processed food.
Frozen . On a tray. In and out of the oven .
I kmow, I kmow that food poverty exists. I know that people can not have the information and therefore cant cook up a veggie burger for about 20 p each( tin redkidney beans/ carrot,onion , or make a lentil dish for pennies with some frozen spinach.

I know its wrong of me ,but if they can do other things such as have kids , drive, use a smart phone.. you can use the latter to look up cheap easy healthy food.
I KNOW am supposed to be sympathetic to lack of opportunity , money and / or education .. and I know that this does apply .. but sometimes I think the excuses can be a little bit much .

babbaloushka · 13/05/2021 23:40

People who eat with their mouths open and lick their fingers. Have a bit of decorum. Friend once said she wonders if they lick their arses too, if they want to behave like animals.

Tiddleandplonk · 13/05/2021 23:43

I judge people who say that they can ride.

But cant .
Why would someone say that.
You dont say you can drive a car when you cant.
And its a living creature .
I judge when people say they can ride ,but cant.. then its time to trot. They do not rise to the trot ,but bounce like mad. ( and I do not mean a deliberate sitting trot ) It looks very painful and funny when men are doing said ' riding ' .😂😂😂😂😂

Moelwynbach · 13/05/2021 23:44

I set high standards for myself on being nice and not treating people badly. I judge bullies and arsehole behaviour harshly. I speak out and give no shits about what people think
I "know" I'm right. Even when I should mind my own business I can be found calling people out on behaviour that I feel doesn't pass muster. I got in trouble in a supermarket for speaking VERY loudly to a woman who was laughing at a man in a wheelchair. Id do it again and have no shame.

Moelwynbach · 13/05/2021 23:47

Oooh and people that stink of fag smoke.

Tambora · 13/05/2021 23:49

I judge people for saying "I have anxiety" when what they mean is, "I feel anxious"...it minimises what is a legitimate and devastating mental health condition for many.

I couldn't agree more. People say they have anxiety when actually they're just worried about something. We all get worried about things. We don't all have anxiety.

DumbestBlonde · 13/05/2021 23:53

@Tiddleandplonk

I judge people who say that they can ride. But cant . Why would someone say that. You dont say you can drive a car when you cant. And its a living creature . I judge when people say they can ride ,but cant.. then its time to trot. They do not rise to the trot ,but bounce like mad. ( and I do not mean a deliberate sitting trot ) It looks very painful and funny when men are doing said ' riding ' .😂😂😂😂😂
I would think people like this are utterly stupid, and fearless in the wrong way. Let alone, have no sympathy or regard for the horse's well-being or comfort.

They would be the ones who hop around tugging and twisting the saddle (unless given access to a mounting block or, God forbid, legged up), digging a toe in and then panicking whengthe horse starts to move off. Then of course, they will be swinging off the bit as though the reins will actually help them stay on board.

I would never have said I could ride if I couldn't - it's actuallhy quite a long way down. And far fromexhilarating when you don't know hoe to use the brakes, or are being taken off with alongside an A-road, aware that they WILL stop after about a quarter of a mile.

Utter fools.

DumbestBlonde · 13/05/2021 23:55

UNaware...... (it's late)

saltinesandcoffeecups · 13/05/2021 23:59

@Tiddleypoms

UhtredRagnarson wonder why it is so annoying ?? Lived in this street and the only neglected looking house has curtians like this evey single day .
As my mother would say “It’s because you don’t know what they are hiding”.

She laughed when I told her I neurotic about the opening and closing of window coverings at appropriate times now as an adult. 🤪

veganmayo · 13/05/2021 23:59

People who drink Monster/Red Bull/Boost energy drinks in the morning. I don’t make the same judgement about people who get their caffeine hit from coffee or tea throughout the day, but somehow energy drinks seem sooo much tackier Sad

MintyMabel · 14/05/2021 00:02

I genuinely don’t judge people for the things they choose to do. I am aware of when I am likely to be biased, and act accordingly. Unconscious bias is a little different as it is difficult to put a finger on what those are and where those come from, and it isn’t always judgement.

I can disagree with how someone chooses to do something without judging them for it. My thought is usually “I wouldn’t do that because it wouldn’t work for me” rather than “they shouldn’t do that because it’s wrong”

However, with a nod to the lighthearted note, my internal voice shouts “It’s a girl!!!” whenever I see a a baby with no hair with one of those huge hair bands with a big flower or bow on it. I genuinely don’t see the point of them.

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