When (if) did you combine finances with your partner?

[awkwardusername]

AIBU for not knowing what the protocol is? Everyone seems to do it differently, so what did you do, if anything?

When I bought a flat we set up a joint account but kept separate accounts too. I also have a separate savings account just in my name. The joint account is for mortgage, bills, food and kids stuff. We each party half our income into it. He earns double what I do, when he earned x 4 more he paid x 4 more than me into it so it's fair as the reason I was so low paid was due to being part time so I could care for DC's. We do argue over money as he's a penny pincher. For years for example he refused to pay for holidays as he thought they were a waste of money. I think he's realising the error of his ways and is now more generous, e.g. I would expect given how much he earns to help me out with big one off expenses like car repairs as I simply don't have the cash. I goes through every transaction on the joint account with a fine tooth comb. Another reason for me to have a separate account for my own clothes/skincare/social life.

Should say he goes through every transaction.

30 years ago, I earnt significantly more than him and owned my own house in London. We had a pre-nup and have never had a joint account. I had a documented larger equity share in our main home but it all became largely irrelevant the longer we were together and the more he earn.

Mostly now our assets are managed tax efficiently. There were years when I'd no idea what he earned and years when he had only a vague idea about what I had. We are much clearer now as we get older and things need to be in apple pie order in the event something were to happen to either of us.

Joint here. Doesnt suit everyone. He wouldnt watch it unless it runs low. Big purchases I would run by him eg new sofa. Had it joint since wedding and wedding deposits. Both working

@Needawantaholiday

Yes, that's us too, but 41 years this Sept!

We got a joint account when we moved in together, and I think we put in the same amount to pay for rent & bills (even though he earned more).

Once we were married and I was pregnant DH took over putting the money into that joint account, so he pays for all the essentials.

I pay for the kids monthly savings, our shares, and a few small bits like our family gym membership, tv license & prime.

Roughly, he pays for the present & I invest in the future, but we still have a small pot of our own money. It works for us.

We pooled our money after we’d been married about 2 years and I got a big promotion and our finances were significantly different. It was my idea, not DH’s, but it didn’t feel right for me to have all this extra money and him not. We pool all bills and savings in joint accounts, and then allocate spending money to our respective sole accounts. I get more than him but that was by his suggestion because I have more regular outgoings like nails/hairdressers etc. Works really well for us and we’ve never had any disagreements, it’s not for everyone though. I think having separate “spending money” stops arguments because we don’t comment on each other’s purchases.

Up to the couple, we did it when we got married.

When we moved in together we got a joint account for joint expenses and just put the same amount in each when it ran out. When I went on mst leave with our first child we then paid all our income into one account and kept the same amount of pocket money each. As out money situation eased (around 10 years later), we just pooled everything. I take home twice what he does but think I can only do that as he supported my career by picking up lots of childcare when the kids were younger. For me it was a out when we could no longer make a decision re finances or earnings which did not affect the other. E.g working in London dramatically increased my earnings but meant my commute was so long I could not do childcare until 7 and no school runs.

@Pyewackect

The house is in both our names. Everything else is totally separate.

Same here. House is in both of our names, most everything else is separate.

I earn a lot more so put savings into a joint account and pay more bills. It is our money and check with each other before spending. The joint account is for holidays, unexpected repairs, bills etc.

Even though it is ours, I would never pool money into one pot.

Married 42 years and always had a joint account. He put in more initially now i do.. No mortgage now retirement looming savings account will be both names. Always have operated like this

We combined finances when we decided to buy a house together. I put in more deposit, he earned more than me but we just put all money together. After a few years we had a baby, then a second and I didn’t work for many years. His salary has increased a lot. I now only work part time and he earns much more than me but we still share finances. We both spend what we like, it’s never questioned.

Our parents seem to have separate finances and it’s really awkward sometimes when they’re talking about who is paying for something when we’re out. But then I think my partners parents think I shouldn’t have unlimited access to ‘his’ money.

It’s no one's business but yours, you just have to find something you’re both happy with.

When we moved in together we opened a joint account. We transfer in a equal sum each once a month and our joint outgoings (utilities, mortgage, tv licence, insurance, ‘big shop’ food for the house, etc) come out of that account. We both have our own accounts for the rest and do what we like with it.

If you can't share something as fundamental as money then something isn't right

Lol you'd hate us then, we're not even going to live together

Similar to a lot of previous posters, we each have our own current accounts and pay the same amount into the joint account each month (we earn about the same). Opened this a short time after moving in together.

Most household expenses (mortgage, council tax, utilities, big food shop, DIY) comes out of the joint account. Plus the odd meal out.

We pay for our own clothes / travel / hobbies from our own accounts. I pay for Amazon Prime from mine and he pays for Netflix.

We each have our own savings and pension although his is a lot better. I feel like it's easy since we both work full time. If someone was a SAHP we'd have to figure out how to make it fair.

Never. Our income is our own and we each pay a proportion of household bills.

We have a joint account we both pay into each month for bills and food etc then separate accounts with our own personal money

When we moved into our own home together.

We joint own the house regardless of percentage put in because we were working toward a shared future with a child. We wanted us/our rather than me/my share.

I get why people split the ownership by percentage but i think there is a point (PRE CHILDREN) where we wanted to be all in for our shared future and not one owning more than the other for the rest of time as we saw it a bit as hedging bets.

I wouldnt join finances with new partners once children were involved without legal advice.

Shared finances as soon as our eldest was born. All money goes into a joint account, all the bills are paid from that account. A set amount is transferred into a different joint account for rainy day/emergency fund, a set amount is split between our individual LISAs and we put a set amount in each of our personal accounts to spend as we want.

When we moved in together. Every since then we’ve always paid in proportional amounts of our incomes to joint accounts / savings / mortgage etc leaving us with equal amounts of ‘free’ spending money. We’ve been together almost 20 years - sometimes I’ve earned more, sometimes he has. We are a team and this works for us as the fairest way of meeting our financial commitments.