To want people to calm my baby by his actual name?

[SimGuruRu]

Name change as outing. To avoid the inevitable “what’s his name” replies ... he’s called Brian, hence outing.
He’s 6 weeks old and friends and family seem unable to call him by his actual name. They make up stupid names for him “baby Bobo” for example, I’ve had people literally snigger when I say his name. MIL has outright told us it’s an awful name for a baby and she can’t say it without laughing.
I’ve told DH I’m getting to the point where I feel if people can’t call him by his name maybe they shouldn’t be seeing him?! He thinks this is an overreaction and that I’m being too dramatic. They are going to make him grow up hating his own name.
AIBU?

@SimGuruRu

Wow must say I’m surprised by some of these responses. Didn’t expect that from fellow parents 😞 What on earth is wrong with Brian? Why is it any different from George? Alfie? Archie?

But also these people wouldn’t dare sneaking at a name if it was foreign or the person wasnt white etc...

It would just be accepted out of respect.

I’m not sure why it’s ok to openly laugh at anyone’s name.

I actually think it’s a beautiful name. It sounds like Brandon, or Briony, both lovely names. It has Celtic origins and a lovely family connection. I bet in 10 years time all our parents names like Lorraine etc will be as fashionable as all the old lady/men names are now.

He's your son, you like the name, I don't see anything wrong with it and I very much doubt your son will see anything wrong it when he's older. I'm a Karen and I like my name despite all the negative associations! Fuck everyone else.

@Member984815

Why is Brian a controversial choice, it's fairly common name where I am from especially in my generation

It's used (among certain groups of people) as an insult based on the name (almost) of the presenter "Brian Cant".

@Pet8 I bet your Beryl was thrilled with the crown episode about Princess Margaret! If she's of an age her kids could be calling on her name for grandkids!

Nothing wrong with his name!!
Some folk are just bloody rude and ignorant!

The more i keep saying Brian the more I like it!

Who ever thought Arthur would be fashionable?

I suspect next
Brian
Clive
Ian
Rodney
Roger
Jeffrey
Ken
Derek

Will all peak again!

Brian is a fine name for a man. It's a bit comical for a baby, because it sounds so grown-up, but there's nothing wrong with it per se.

People often forget when naming their baby that they are naming an adult as well, and that they will be an adult for far longer than they will be a child - hence the proliferation of shortened names and names ending in "ie" (Charlie, Bobby, Ronnie, Reggie [curiously acceptable to name your child after a violent criminal], Millie, Molly etc) . You haven't fallen into this trap.

If you were to receive an official letter signed by Brian Smith or one signed by Ronnie Smith, which one would you take more seriously? I know which one sounds better to me.

I think Brian is a great name so stuff anyone who doesn’t like it and is rude enough to say so.
I would take Brian over Jayden and Jaxon any day!

Exactly. Your generation. Very few names age through time, James is the first one that come to mind that does. It doesn't have a 'classic' ring to it as other older names do. Just sounds like someone's grandad

That is just not true - so many names considered ok for babies today wouldn't have been ok when I was a child, some still not when I was naming my children, as they were considered old people's names.
But they come back.

Some shockingly rude replies on here OP

There is nothing wrong with his name

YANBU for wanting people to call him by his name - I think the only thing you can do is keep correcting people who give him a cutesy nickname - none of my children had a cutesy nickname, none of my siblings children have either, it's completely unnecessary

I think it can be very hard to call a tiny baby a very grown up name, regardless of the name itself. Brian isn't common among babies so people will associate it with older people.

One of my friends called their son John and it just seemed so weird! I also struggle with Peter.

So I don't think it's about the Brian name itself although of course some people won't like it.

I can’t believe some of these responses either OP. Presumably most will be from other mothers. I can’t get my head round how mothers can be so horrible about a name that is perfectly reasonable.

I’m shocked at some of the rude replies you’ve had on here

My friend has a son called Brian, he’s 9 now and they haven’t had any negativity about it.

YABU for not calling him Barry.

He’s going to get this all his life

He really isn't. No one will bat an eye at an adult Brian.

All this faux "I mean this as nicely as possible..." No you don't, you're just being rude,

Two completely different things going on:

1. People make up cutesy names for ALL babies. It's a way of showing affection and relating to the baby in a baby-appropriate way.

2. People commenting on the name.

You have a chosen a very 'out there' name, for the UK, at this time. People are likely to be surprised, some will say so. That will continue long past babyhood.

Don't forget op that mumsnet loves absolutely stupid names like ptolomey and clementine.

If i look at the name Brian and sound it out, it's actually quite nice. I wish all the people who are telling you to change it would tell us their kids names.

And of course it is all about fashion - you have picked an outlier for the current generation, but it's just that.

I can remember thinking a George, born in the 1980s, was an anachronism. Now you can't move for Georges.

When I was a child we all laughed at the "old people" names like Mabel, Ruby, Jack, Stanley, Ernest etc but we're all calling our children those names now. The current generation of children will be calling their own kids Julie, Christine, Alan, Janet, Derek, Martin, Avril, Graham, Sandra - and Brian.

@nanbread I think the new spider-man movies are making Peter seem more acceptable for young people now. It's funny all the marvel characters were created decades back so all have names like Peter, Steven, Janet, Bruce, Carol etc.

There must be some very young people on this thread if the name Brian genuinely causes them mirth. Bless!

I think actually it is not reasonable to call children after family particularly if it’s a name that is going to cause them issues. That’s doing it for the parents not for the child. Saying that though it’s hardly like you named him Dorcas, Darth or Maim like the people did in this article.

www.redbookmag.com/life/mom-kids/g4694/most-ridiculous-baby-names/

Our younger daughter has a name that is more common in older generations. It has caused zero problems whatsoever and she has absolutely "grown into" it and owned it. It's just who she is. The people that are being very rude should be ashamed of themselves.

People using silly nicknames for babies is normal, though. We called our eldest "pickle" so much that we realised she didn't know her proper name once she started to speak .

I think it's really nice!

As others have said, daft nicknames for babies are common and especially if there is another one in the family.

For those who knew your grandfather as a grown man it might be difficult to make the switch to applying it to a new baby, especially his wife and children.

I'd just carry on calling him Brian and they'll get used to it and probably start using it more as he gets older.