To want people to calm my baby by his actual name?

[SimGuruRu]

Name change as outing. To avoid the inevitable “what’s his name” replies ... he’s called Brian, hence outing.
He’s 6 weeks old and friends and family seem unable to call him by his actual name. They make up stupid names for him “baby Bobo” for example, I’ve had people literally snigger when I say his name. MIL has outright told us it’s an awful name for a baby and she can’t say it without laughing.
I’ve told DH I’m getting to the point where I feel if people can’t call him by his name maybe they shouldn’t be seeing him?! He thinks this is an overreaction and that I’m being too dramatic. They are going to make him grow up hating his own name.
AIBU?

I can't believe the number of people who think it's ok for close familly to be rude about a baby's name. Especially when it's a perfectly normal name.

He will grow into it.

I do think it's normal to take a while for a name to feel right for a baby. We referred to ours as "the baby" for about the first 9 months.

@Ugzbugz

The more i keep saying Brian the more I like it!

Who ever thought Arthur would be fashionable?

I suspect next
Brian
Clive
Ian
Rodney
Roger
Jeffrey
Ken
Derek

Will all peak again!

Hmmm. Maybe but not sure this will be in my lifetime!

Would you not be surprised if you were introducing to baby Derek at playgroup? 😅

It's a great name, OP, and a refreshing change from the samey names that are currently popular. YANBU.

Best wishes to you and Brian.
,

@lottiegarbanzo

How is the name ‘Brian’ ‘out-there’?
It’s an old, established name lol.

I really like the name Brian and I think people are being very rude, including on this thread. It's a lovely, traditional name. Suggestions that you have opened him up to "a lifetime of ridicule" are idiotic, it's not as if you've called him Oompa Loompa. Brian is a completely normal name! Your MIL in particular is pathetic and needs to grow up.

And also to anyone claiming its not a 'tradional' name....

Brian Origin and Meaning-
The name Brian is a boy's name of Irish origin meaning "strong, virtuous, and honorable".
The origins of the name Brian are not entirely clear, but it is suspected that it evolved from an Old Celtic word related to nobility. In Ireland the name is associated with Brian Boru, the most famous of all Irish warrior-kings, credited with driving the Vikings out of Ireland.

YANBU. I also don't understand what's wrong with Brian, he's not going to be a baby/child for ever and no-one has looked at an adult Brian and thought that's a silly name for an adult!

Better than some of the names I see suggested that are too cutsey/ridiculous for anybody over the age of 5.

An unfortunate name to choose, so perhaps people are avoiding it by using other silly names.

It may be OK when he is 70.

He isn’t always going to be a baby though is he? He’s named after my grandad - and just as he isn't always going to be a baby, people aren't always going to use pet names for him. It's completely normal for people to use pet names and nicknames for babies - but you don't hear many parents or grandparents calling their 7/8 year old Pudding or Petal or RosyPosy in the school playground!

You are making too big a deal of this, people would be using nicknames regardless of what you called the baby, in your heart of hearts you know that Brian is an unusual name for a baby nowadays with various connotations, most of them not particularly positive, so you are conflating two issues here.

Sixties and Seventies names are slowly on the way back, I work in childcare and know of a Susan, Judith, Ronald, Colin and Janet born within the past two years. I love how names are resurrected.

There’s nothing wrong with Brian! I’m sure you’re ahead of the curve as others say. I also love Ralph. I hope Nigel doesn’t return though - although in saying that I have a really cool relative called Nigel who totally pulls it off! So it just goes to show that a name on paper has a different abstract vibe to the name once applied to the person. If everyone took family votes when they named babies, all boys would be Mark and all girls would be Laura. People need to buck them common denominator for unique names to thrive! (I do love both Mark & Laura haha but you see what I mean).

What is wrong with Brian? I like it!

Just ignore them. Everyone gives babies stupid nicknames it’s just par for the course.

Honestly OP - and other posters - this is another area of anti-Irish undertones that people don't even recognise.

Brian is a common Irish name. Its not as popular as it once was, but we have a culture where naming babies after adults is more common, and so I would be a bit surprised but not totally shocked to come across a baby Brian.

There is much more a tendency to have 'trendy' names in the UK, and unfortunately Brian as one that travelled must have fit that category and is linked with a particular generation. But - would you mock a baby David? Must have been similar to Brian in age and popularity. If not, do you think why?

In 2015, Brian was in the top 100 in Ireland. Its only recently gone outside. So all this people laughing hysterically - do they imagine they won't meet any Irish people in 20 years? There is so much small-minded parochialism, but I bet if someone said 'I'm Indian, I want to name my son after my Indian grandfather, people are mocking the name and my husbands family say they can't pronounce it' people would be rightly calling out the family for their racism and prejudice.

Your extended family need to wind their necks in, and you need to protect your baby. I don't think the responses you get here are reflective of real life. I know some insane names, and I would personally much prefer a baby Brian to a baby Wilbur, or Stanley, or Archie.

Please someone explain the so-called negative connotations associated with the name of Brian.

There is nothing wrong with the name Brian at all so for those saying it’s an awful name are just rude so ignore them but many people call babies nicknames so I wouldn’t worry about that part.

It's not a name I'd choose, and I'd probably do a double take at a baby Brian, but it's the name you chose, and you like it, so everyone else can fuck off.

It's not like it's a totally unusual unique name. You're just ahead of the times naming him. I bet in 10 years time there'll be loads of little Brians running around.

Like all the Arthurs And Stanleys there are now.

@Helendee

Sixties and Seventies names are slowly on the way back, I work in childcare and know of a Susan, Judith, Ronald, Colin and Janet born within the past two years. I love how names are resurrected.

I really like all those, especially Susan! I quite like the idea of a revival of 60’s and 70’s baby names!

People are terrifically rude. Although as PP have said, it's not unusual for people to use nicknames, especially if a name is more of a grown up sounding name a baby will grow into. My son has a long quite grown up and somewhat old fashioned name and no one ever used it when he was tiny, he got called a range of cutesy nicknames.

OP I’ve got a kid called Terry….he’s nearly 13 and I still get the looks. He’s also named after his grandad. Yes it’s an old man name, no I don’t care. He doesn’t mind it although he mostly gets called TJ (his initials) he has a proper name for when he needs it.

Having said that I’ve got 4 kids and rarely call them by their actual name

My friends very young chikd is called Derek, not to keen myself

Two questions:

What does your DH say to his mother when she is so rude about HIS choice of name? I hope he is standing by it as a joint decision and not claiming you forced him into it as he couldn’t say no because it was your Grandad’s name?

What about the members of your family who knew your Grandad Brian? What do they think?

Well done for choosing a sensible name and so lovely to name him after your grandad. So many people choose 'cute' names for their children without thinking what they will sound like as an adult. Lots of them sound quite silly especially if they end up as a 6ft tall solicitor or doctor. I know a few Brians from 60 down to 25 and I think it is a lovely strong name.

It's a very 'out there' name, for the UK, at this time @Helendee because it's a deeply unfashionable name, in the UK, at this time.

It was fashionable here 50-80 years ago. It may be again in 20-40 years, when baby-boomer names turn 100 years old. It is a normal name now in the US.

For now, here, it is very unfashionable. Which doesn't make it bad, just unusual.

@JoshLymanIsHotterThanSam

OP I’ve got a kid called Terry….he’s nearly 13 and I still get the looks. He’s also named after his grandad. Yes it’s an old man name, no I don’t care. He doesn’t mind it although he mostly gets called TJ (his initials) he has a proper name for when he needs it.

Having said that I’ve got 4 kids and rarely call them by their actual name

I actually love this name, havent heard it for so long!

Brian and Terry from East 17, loved them.

An unfortunate name to choose, so perhaps people are avoiding it by using other silly names.

An unfortunate name WTF it’s Brian not Apple as some babies are called. Just like Sam, Dave, Steven etc they’re just common/traditional names whereas people like to try and be different or ‘posh’ these days.

I’d love to know the kids names of people who think there is something so wrong with Brian.