To not get why people refuse to exercise?

[JumpingJacky]

Exercise near enough saved my life, literally, and I am evangelical about it but still people make so many excuses as to why they can’t do just a small amount, and don’t realise that they are suffering for it!

I have a relative who suffers from back pain. He spends a large majority of his day sitting. I have suggested various low impact exercises that I know through experience will help but he won’t do them while continuing whingeing and moaning about being in pain!

A friend who is overweight complains that she has pain in her knees and ankles and is finding walking hard which is stopping her doing stuff. I know weight loss is hard so I suggest she joins the gym (she can afford it and has time) to use the low impact machines to at least build some strength into her legs and get a bit fitter but she’s just not interested whilst continuing to whinge and moan!

I get it that exercise is hard and can make you uncomfortable and sweaty but for the benefits to your body that’s a small price to pay surely?

I read an article in Runner's World (I think) years ago, addressing why it's so difficult to motivate yourself sometimes to exercise - this was aimed at people who actually enjoy running and exercising. The answer was, that exercise is extra effort and uncomfortable, so it's in our factory settings as humans (massively paraphrasing the article here) to avoid things which expend unnecessary energy or that are uncomfortable or cause us suffering, even though we know we'll feel good afterwards. So add in body hangups, aches and pains, depression, horrible memories of PE, and it's a bit more unstandable why people might shy away.

I cannot stand people who are evangelical about anything personally.

It's such an arrogance to decide you (and only you) have the answer to life. I don't give a shit if you have:-

*Found God/religion
*Discovered a new diet
*Love exercise
*Have gone vegan
*Have offset your carbon footprint
*Drive an electric car
*Have discovered inner peace/meditation
*Have MarieKondo-d their entire house

Whatever. Don't bang on to other people about it. They don't care and don't want to know. It's really, really bad manners if nothing else.

I have a tibia platue fracture due no fault of mine, I was an avid runner before however I now have a metal plate in my knee and 90% range of motion therefore I can not bend knee like other people. It also kills me every time to walk more then 3 miles. I can’t run, kneel to planks or exercises. I wake up everyday with arthritis in my knee. I exercise as much as I can but I can’t got back to what I did my whole leg has changed. So I’ve put on weight. There’s only so much food will do to help you control the weight. So think about other people’s background before you make judgment

People don't like being preached to.
We know we're fat.
We know we need to exercise.
I guarantee that nobody will say to you, 'Gosh! I never knew exercise was good for me!'

You’re quiet op...

Aside from going for walks (and sometimes long ones!) I really don't enjoy exercising! I'd rather eat less to maintain a healthy weight. And I hate sweaty gyms, breeding ground for germs 🦠

I hate exercise. It makes me feel nauseous and very, very shaky; it depresses me to even think of a gym. (I did try one once and would rather chew gravel than ever go back) I'm overweight and very unfit: I'm very unhappy about both those things but they're partially the result of specific medications I'm on long-term and partially from comfort eating after losing the husband I adore to Covid a year ago. If you tried to tell me that exercise would solve my problems I'd tear out your liver and feed it to my dogs.

This thread explains a lot

Just suggesting or liking exercise makes you an “evangelist” someone who is smug, who preaches and apparently needs their liver torn out

I think people are allowed to choose to be fat/unfit

Leave them be

I work 12 hour shifts mostly on my feet with few breaks. That is exercise enough for me. I don't need the gym

@frumpety

The thing I notice about people who achieve a certain level of fitness is that they seem to have an element of amnesia about where they started from and how it felt during the process of getting there.

I wonder if, when life starts getting in the way of their exercise regime such as a job change, health issues, children or other responsibilities, if they will remember as the pounds they're not constantly fighting against, start to creep back in.

I wonder if, when life starts getting in the way of their exercise regime such as a job change, health issues, children or other responsibilities, if they will remember as the pounds they're not constantly fighting against, start to creep back in.

Not everybody is "fighting against the pounds" by exercising, some actually enjoy exercising. It might come as a shock, but there's a life out of running and the gym (which are enjoyable for some anyway). Some people love horse riding, love dancing, love playing squash, skiing... No need for amnesia about the beginning.

A healthy diet and not over-eating constantly has nothing to do with it. You can have less time, but not put on weight anyway.

Your weight is around 70% diet, 30% exercise...

Why don't people exercise? There are almost as many reasonsand/or excuses as there are people who don't. My personal reasons are, 1) erratic heart rate (I skip several beats every couple of minutes, and it intensifies with exercise); 2) arthritis in both hips, both knees, and one ankle; 3) less than 75% lung function (actually improved from about 50% lung function a couple of years ago). That's a combination that means any real exertion could put me on the floor, struggling to breathe...at best.

Eventually, my erratic heart pattern will get bad enough that my doctor will consider the dangers of my going under a general anesthetic to be worth the risk, and I'll have a pacemaker. Until then, please do not preach to me about the wonders of exercise.

I go on a turbo and watch an hours tv while I cycle. Do it most days it’s a habit now like cleaning my teeth. Works for me as I get bored otherwise but watching an hours tv gets me through it. Burns 500 odd calories and I do weights too. Feel better for it. Also do weekly ride with friends and paddleboarding and a dance app.Think as you age you need to do some exercise for your health whether you like it or not. Late 40s and almost all my friends do some form of exercise.

I think a lot of the time it comes down to lack of confidence in their body.

However what I would say is maybe inviting people out for a walk with you is a good idea.

I can appreciate what you are saying, but when you're put of shape, and you're already uncomfortable, there's a certain amount of anxiety about making things worse.

Last April I was in a terrible state, at just shy of 24 stone, I was so uncomfortable, I couldn't tie my own laces, wanted to go for a walk, but turned back about 50 metres in because I was in too much pain with my back and ankles. I'd spend all my time sat down as it was just the most comfortable place to be.

I'm now down to 15 stone 9 (bmi of 36- so still a way to go) but I can comfortably walk upto 6km without stopping, and I've recently started a bit of trampolining, swimming is excellent. The thing is, when I started, it was hard. As time has gone on its become easier. To a point, I'm used to a certain amount of pain, but the goal to be healthier and gain more or a life is enough to help me look past that. It helps its a different sort of pain, more tiredness and from actual use.

My day looks like, 10000+ steps a day, usually 10 minutes of bouncing on the trampoline, dancing around. Housework is easier, gardening too. I try to swim but getting a booking is nigh on impossible right now!

They do need to want it for themselves though.

@GreyhoundG1rl

My 5yo wakes at 5am... No way in hell I'm getting up before then What time do they go to sleep at?

@GreyhoundG1rl between 7.45-8.15pm usually.

@Pumperthepumper

Oh stop. Running actually changed my life and I’m evangelical about it but it’s not as simple as ‘it’s uncomfortable and that’s a small price to pay’ - there are so many things that can stop a person. Weather. Safety. Decent trainers or walking boots. Time. Injury.

Disability

“They do need to want it for themselves though.“

Absolutely.

@JumpingJacky Earlier in the thread you wrote: I also have degenerative disc disease. I was told an operation was too risky and my only option was to build my lower back up.

Now, I have had physio therapy including rehabilitation in a hospital for certain injuries (don’t want to divulge).

One of my ongoing conditions involves a prolapsed disc. Never have I ever been advised to build my lower back up. I have consistently been advised by doctors and physio therapists to build my abdominal muscle strength as it is these muscles that support the spine. Then, I progressed to building my gluteus muscles and back muscles and arms and legs.

Anyone with a spinal condition should be following the advice of medical professionals who have examined them and examined any scans, X-rays or other test results they’ve had. They should not be comparing themselves to you and your experience. Or taking advice from you.

I’m glad that you are getting good results from your exercise program. But, you are not the benchmark for all of humanity to measure themselves against you, to copy you or be advised by your unqualified opinions.

Now that you have achieved physical health and fitness perhaps you could work on your self esteem where you do not need to compare yourself to others to make yourself feel good or better than others.

And perhaps work on being humble too.

I have a congenital spine condition and every single time I've been to the gym I have put myself into agony for 6 months and often required surgery. The same has happened with home exercise videos. I walk a lot and cycle a bit but nothing that really gets the heart going or tones me up. People constantly push Pilates on me but again, last time I tried this I hurt my back again as it's just not aligned in the same way as a 'normal' back. So please do not tell me that exercise will help.

I wouldn’t advise another adult unless asked and obviously if you have a health condition and can’t that’s that.

But it is frustrating to see people you care about not happy and you know a way to help and they won’t do it! Surely familiar to anyone whose parented teens...! That said Don’t know anyone overweight or otherwise who doesn’t exercise once kids out of needy zone.

I can't add anything here which hasn't already been said. Bad memories of being bullied by a horrible PE teacher at school is a big factor in my dislike of doing anything sporty. When I left I vowed that I'd never again set foot in a swimming pool (the smell of chlorine almost makes me want to vomit) and running is unpleasant and painful due to arthritis.

I will take some stretching and general keep-fit exercises at home but that really is as far as I wish to go.

I used to keep weight off by walking everywhere 6-10 miles a day.
Then I got a job. I had to get a car as the childminder and school are 5 miles from my work.
I have gained loads of weight.
You want to know why I don’t exercise????

Because I don’t have time. My life is constant dashing around after 3 kids and a full time job. From 6am until 8pm I have no time. I suppose if you were my friend you would suggest getting up earlier or exercising late.... considering I suffer from insomnia. I already struggle on 4-5 hours of sleep.

Point I’m trying to make.... stop judging people, you have no idea of what people deal with on a daily basis!

OP is just being pushy.

Compared to all the other ways MNers can be very pushy I don't find OP offensive at all. She is several league tables below the rabid anti-trans posters, HRT-lovers, LTB! shouters, house-proud-& cleaning-obsessed, "I'd never answer my door to unexpected callers", "Every day sexism and ageism is so unacceptable" moaners, "Piercing babies' ears is child abuse" or "If your child is badly behaved but doesn't have SN then you Must Be A Bad Parent" messengers.

It worked for you so fine. Leave it. Only offer advice if asked for or you'll be a bore with no friends.