To not have another child?

[L41K4]

I am 99.9% sure I’m done with just the one. I know this may change, but I’m pretty adamant due to health reasons.

But I’ve been told this is unfair and DC will be lonely. What are your experiences? We’re you an only child? How did you find it? If you only had one is your DC contented? If you had more was that the better choice?

@willowtree81

I read an article about peoples experiences of being an only child. One quote always stuck with me, it was along the lines of "As an only child you know absolutely that YOU are the centre of your parents world and you never have to fight for that/ question it." Love that.

I really don't think you should feel pressured by society over something so big and personal to you. No one really cares what anyone else is doing, but you'll be the one living it.

That quote was definitely wrong in my case. As an only I found that I definitely wasn't the centre of anything. Home and holidays were lonely as my parents wouldn't play with me and going to places and visiting relatives was lonely as it was just adults talking and I was ignored most of the time. I remember donating all my board games to charity as I never had anyone to play them with, so it was pointless still owning then, even though I still wanted to play them.

If you are going to just have one child, make sure you spend that quality time playing and talking with them, even when they aren't a small child. Also remember that visiting relatives is boring if there is no-one to interact with you.

@Kpo58 that really resonated with me and I will absolutely remember that. Thank you for sharing, I’m so sorry that you felt your childhood was like that. I will endeavour to do all I can to make sure DC never feels that lonely. ❤️

This thread has made me think about how my friends relate to their siblings as adults.

Two of my friends are close to their siblings, live in the same town as them and see them very frequently.

The vast majority of my friends like their siblings, but only see them occasionally, e.g. a few times per a year, if that. Two of these friends live in different countries to their only siblings.

One friend doesn’t dislike her much older brother, but feels they have almost nothing in common.

One friend likes his eldest sibling, but has been estranged from their other sibling for years, due to a bitter family dispute.

I get the impression that most adults don’t see much of their siblings. Sad, really.

My brother made my childhood a misery at times. I would've been much happier as an only, and things would've been much easier for my mum if she'd only had him and not followed up with me.