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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To take my DC away in term time

113 replies

GrapeTwine · 26/04/2021 17:24

DC isn't yet in school but I have two DSC in primary school.

My parents often go on trips away, abroad or UK (appreciate abroad trips not likely at the moment but they have a holiday home abroad when this starts up again) during term time as obviously it's cheaper for them.

They have started inviting me and DC to come along sometimes too.

I don't earn a huge amount but am okay so whenever I go, either I or occasion my parents, pay.

DH now saying he thinks it's unfair as we don't often go away during the school holidays with DSC (we have been before but we can't always afford it).

I want to make the most of it whilst DC young enough to not need to go in school holidays.

AIBU?

To clarify It's only ever me and DC that go, DH stays home and has DSC as normal so no contact being missed or anything.

OP posts:
Dishwashersaurous · 28/04/2021 06:38

if there's no annual leave restrictions then crack on

Pleaseaddcaffine · 28/04/2021 06:48

Why would AL restrictions matter?
Lots of families ahve to split Al to cover school holidays, as op dc is not in school this is a rare advantag and she doesn't need to. There should be no assumption that her AL is for providing free childcare for dsc, because that would be wrong.
In our home dp takes leave for all the children's childcare. We go away for 1 or 2 weeks a year s a family. I take my AL in addition to this to cover my dc childminder hols and take ds away then, often out of school hols and alone.
Dp is welcome to join but he has other commitments which is also fine. We often go with my dc cousins or grandparents which is nice for him.

Dishwashersaurous · 28/04/2021 06:56

The annual leave was not about the dsc, but that if she couldn't have any holiday time with her husband. But thats not constraint

mdh2020 · 28/04/2021 07:40

It is illegal in the UK to take children out of school to go on holiday. It may be an inconvenience to the parents and/or grandparents but children need to be in school learning, especially after the last year.

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 28/04/2021 07:56

@mdh2020

It is illegal in the UK to take children out of school to go on holiday. It may be an inconvenience to the parents and/or grandparents but children need to be in school learning, especially after the last year.
It is most definetly not illegal.
Eyevorbig0ne · 28/04/2021 08:09

I used to take toddler on holiday alone in term time.
I was sahm and my dad paid for I. O. W once, CP once, and I paid for haven once.
Partner was working and unable to take extra leave (all used up for our touring caravan breaks).
Loved it. But I knew I'd only have one so made the most of early year freedom.
Yanbu.

Mumdiva99 · 28/04/2021 08:11

Of course it's fine. These years pass so quickly enjoy the time you have before he goes to school. It's lovely to spend time with your parents too.

I used to take my kids away without OH (and still do when I can afford it in the school holidays) - we also go together. But OH doesn't always want to spend as much time withy family as I do.

I have precious memories of staying with my grandparents, then just my nanny and going to see my great aunt. They are no longer around but my eldest has memories from this. My mum used to come to my great aunts with us. That was lovely too.

Sciurus83 · 28/04/2021 08:15

This is so fine it's barely worth discussing Wink

Lalliella · 28/04/2021 08:22

I would make sure you have holidays with DH and SC but also go away with DC and your DPs. I’d go on as many holidays as I could!

Clymene · 28/04/2021 09:12

@mdh2020

It is illegal in the UK to take children out of school to go on holiday. It may be an inconvenience to the parents and/or grandparents but children need to be in school learning, especially after the last year.
The OP's child isn't even in school so your answer is irrelevant as well as wrong
NameChangedForThisFeb21 · 28/04/2021 09:16

@mdh2020

It is illegal in the UK to take children out of school to go on holiday. It may be an inconvenience to the parents and/or grandparents but children need to be in school learning, especially after the last year.
Are you on the wrong thread?

The OP has a child that isn’t even old enough for school.

Also it’s not illegal to take school aged children on holiday during school time. What on Earth made you think it was? Do you always just make things up like that?

Upamountain43 · 28/04/2021 09:33

I think it is absolutely wonderful that your DSC get some time on their own with their dad without his new partner and baby being there. This could be such a special time for them to do fun things together.

So many children never get to do this - see it as a very.lucky opportunity that you can make the most of.

Oneeyeopen · 28/04/2021 09:44

I don't have sc.
But when my dc were small I took them to visit family regularly abroad and in the uk without my dh.
My dh never complained and encouraged us to have a nice time.
Some of my happiest memories are me, dc and dp's having fun together.
My adult dd and I still have an annual holiday just us two.
If your dp's have a holiday home then make the most of it.
Your dsc are your dh's responsibility and he should organise a family holiday including them.

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