To think there are no women without imposter syndrome?

[TwinkleToesForever]

I suffer terribly with imposter syndrome. I am an experienced professional and work in a high performing environment. I am in a constant state of anxiety, feel like a fraud and am very hard on myself for the smallest error. I always reflect on what I’ve said in meetings and feel like a complete fool. Everyone around me seems highly competent and more in favour with the boss. I am exhausted with it all and think daily about resigning because I’m just not good enough and can’t take the pressure anymore. On the other hand I earn well and I feel fortunate to have the position I have . I’ve read that this is very common in women - Anyone out there not feel like they are failing every day? That they are good at their job? How do you do it? I’d love to learn some coping mechanisms and generally how to give myself a break!!! I am also thinking daily that because this job makes me miserable ( very alpha and competitive culture) I should just give up and leave, but then I’d probably beat myself up for that too! Any advice welcome!!

No advice but I'm exactly the same. I'd love to be able to cope better with it. I'm in a constant state of anxiety and beat myself up terribly.

Me, I’m quite senior at work, global corporation, I’ve never felt like I’m an imposter, I always feel like I’m good at my job, because I am. I can’t teach you any tricks, but if you’re good at your job and delivering you know it.

It may be common but that doesn’t mean every woman suffers from it. Woman aren’t a monolith. I’m confident at work because I know I’m good at my job.

Not everyone who is good at their job and delivering knows it, Bluntness, or imposter syndrome wouldn't exist. It's not uncommon even up to C Suite and as OP says v. common in women. It doesn't mean they're not as good at their job.

I don’t have imposter syndrome. I’m confident in my job. I have been much senior though so currently in a role which sits comfortably with family life.

I've also known men admit to having it who were excellent leaders. It looks exhausting.

I'm the same as you OP. I'm convinced I don't even have imposter syndrome but am just shit. It really is holding me back. I don't contribute as much because I think everyone knows more and will think I'm crap. I'm thinking of getting a mentor but at early 40s I feel a bit old and silly to be tackling this issue.

I don't feel it. I'm not in an especially high powered job and nothing major depends on me, but I generally feel I am doing well enough in both work and as a mum, and well enough is good enough.

I'm almost 40 and just getting to the point where I don't have IS. So maybe it's an age thing?

I wish I had your confidence @Bluntness100 - I have evidence that I have achieved and delivered, I have progressed etc but I still don’t ‘know’ that I’m good. How do you get to a point where you have solid self belief?

I'm confident in my job too. I feel this way because the evidence supports this belief and I suppose I was always raised to feel like I could do (within reason) most things I set my mind to. I have never felt like an imposter.

Do you seek and believe other people's feedback? Do you focus on what you do well and have a learn from mistakes rather than self critical attitude?

I work in construction and its so alpha male. If I don't know something I feel like an idiot. It doesn't help that I've never had a proper mentor and always feel inferior.
I cant wait to leave it but I cant find anything suitable.

It's entirely possible to be good at your job and know it, and still suffer from imposter syndrome, because despite knowing it, there's just a part of you that doesn't feel enough.

It's not as straightforward as just knowing your are good at what you do. That bit isn't so difficult.

@Bluntness100

Me, I’m quite senior at work, global corporation, I’ve never felt like I’m an imposter, I always feel like I’m good at my job, because I am. I can’t teach you any tricks, but if you’re good at your job and delivering you know it.

Funny you say that, cause I find it's equally common to see overconfident people who think they're great being terrible performers at work.

Not me - sorry - I've worked hard, and continue to, I'm good at my job and I deserve to be there.

@Iceniii

This - and I’m 46

It’s gotten worse with age for me

well lots of us 'over confident' women can't fucking win people have regular performance reviews that suggest other wise!

I'm in a male dominated sector and have good reviews but my imposter syndrome is getting worse as I age because I feel I should be more confident.

Firstly you got the job on your own merits and must be functioning well in it as you haven’t been sacked. So that should be somewhat reassuring for you.
It’s more common than you think feeling the way you do.
Just keep getting up and going in and tell yourself they need you to do your job to keep their company going!!

I don't feel an imposter at all. I worked hard to get where I am (director level, fintech, v large company). I worked my way up, taken additional qualifications and go on metrics for my performance.

No imposter syndrome here. Top of my game, very good at what I do and confident in myself and my skill set.

I've got better over the years. I've been promoted several times (more by accident than design..). I used to think I was about the level of someone 3 grades lower. Now I know I'm pretty capable - at the same ability as someone one grade lower! So an improvement with age and experience, but still there in the back of my mind.

One thing I have learnt - if you make a mistake, don't try and hide it. Find a solution, then tell your boss you've made this mistake but that you will do x, y and z to correct it and put these things in place to make sure it doesn't happen again.

I am at the top of my game, and there are only 10,000 of us in this industry, in the world. I own my own company, have a 6 figure income and am fully respected in this industry. I work with very powerful people, and deserve to be working alongside them, as I've worked hard to get here. However I still feel like I don't do a good job, and I shouldn't be where I am. I learn something new every day and that humbles me. My staff humble me because without them, where would I be? I think anybody that is overly confident and claims not to have IS is bordering on arrogance

This is me! I’ve even resigned from roles because of my own perception that I’m not capable. I started a new job 5 weeks ago, a really great position that I have always wanted to do, and I’m having to work really hard to override those feelings. The structure of the company really helps though - far more corporate and therefore encouraged to recognise the efforts of others, as opposed to my previous life in a thankless teaching role! The imposter syndrome is starting to infiltrate in my perception of myself socially now too which I HATE. Used to be a social butterfly, now second guessing myself 😩

I have it but I think I deserve it.

My colleague also has it and she’s incredibly good at her job.