To be annoyed that DH is letting another person use software for free

[User17292127]

AIBU to ask DH to stop allowing another person to access software we use in my and DH's joint business? We've paid for the software so the woman is getting a financial benefit by DH letting her use it for free. The benefit is only a couple of hundred pounds over the course of a year but it's not like she's poor. She has more money than us!

The guy who pays you - do you declare that as income? Do you think this woman should pay you too?

Ok, can you change your mindset? You’re doing her a favour. Sometimes it’s nice to be nice op and it doesn’t impact you in any way shape nor form.

Really interested in where you are that it doesn’t work like that - if I could get business equipment for free I’d happily move

Does letting other people use it breach the licence terms?

It would me uncomfortable.

What if she breaches any terms through her use of it, eg if she uploaded illegal material or something?
Will auditors get access to your business data when auditing her business?

Actually, that would piss me off, too, especially if we could otherwise have a cheaper, single-user licence.

... would make me uncomfortable...

@ICouldHaveCheckedFirst

Does letting other people use it breach the licence terms?

It would me uncomfortable.

What if she breaches any terms through her use of it, eg if she uploaded illegal material or something?
Will auditors get access to your business data when auditing her business?

This is what I'm wondering, although admittedly I was wondering more about him charging someone else to use it.

Are there no laws against that?

Our friend pays what it costs to have the add-on. E.g. if it costs an extra £100 to add on five users, he would pay £20 (they're fictitious amounts, just to explain).
If he fancies her why would he let her use software for free when he knows she's rich? If he fancied her, wouldn't he be buying her things instead?
We don't get the full cost back, we only get tax relief on the cost.

What goes around comes around. I have run a company for many years, and if you do people favours as a matter of course and not worry too much if a specific individual returns the favour, it comes back to you in spades.

If it’s not inconveniencing you, I would leave it.

@Fedup1223

Really interested in where you are that it doesn’t work like that - if I could get business equipment for free I’d happily move

Ohio. You still pay for things up front, but then you get to write the amount off your taxes, so the net cost is $0. At least that's how it was when we owned our business.

@User17292127 YDNBU!
Even without the fact that your husband charges one and not the other - people should pay their own expenses if possible. Or otherwise be grateful for the favour.
She’s both able and has never acknowledged the free ride you’re giving her so I’d be pissed.

Oh and also - your logic is correct. Don’t let neurotypicals put you off with all that wishy washy ‘caring sharing’ rubbish - you are more than capable of assessing whether someone’s taking the piss.

@ilovesooty

The guy who pays you - do you declare that as income? Do you think this woman should pay you too?

Yes. That's it. If he pays us and he's our friend, then why doesn't she pay us too?

[quote TheLastLotus]@User17292127 YDNBU!
Even without the fact that your husband charges one and not the other - people should pay their own expenses if possible. Or otherwise be grateful for the favour.
She’s both able and has never acknowledged the free ride you’re giving her so I’d be pissed.

Oh and also - your logic is correct. Don’t let neurotypicals put you off with all that wishy washy ‘caring sharing’ rubbish - you are more than capable of assessing whether someone’s taking the piss.[/quote]
Oh and also - your logic is correct. Don’t let neurotypicals put you off with all that wishy washy ‘caring sharing’ rubbish - you are more than capable of assessing whether someone’s taking the piss.

Rude ^^

And if the OP was 'more than capable' of this assessment, she wouldn't have started this thread would she?

Unless you personally know her of course.

If he fancies her why would he let her use software for free when he knows she's rich? If he fancied her, wouldn't he be buying her things instead?
This way she owes him.

She’s both able and has never acknowledged the free ride you’re giving her so I’d be pissed

What? How would you even know that? Do you know the op in real life and know what the woman said to her husband?

@DadJoke it certainly does on average - but I know from the outset who would return the favour and who doesn’t, and I’m usually right 😂

Anyways there’s more to this story... as an aside @User17292127 why are all these people piggybacking off your software?

@Bluntness100

She’s both able and has never acknowledged the free ride you’re giving her so I’d be pissed

What? How would you even know that? Do you know the op in real life and know what the woman said to her husband?

She’s said it up thread

OP, how does your DH feel about this? Is he adamant she shouldn't be charged/excluded or does he not have a strong opinion either way?

If it's the latter and it's a joint business, email and tell her you'll be charging or excluding her.

Check the legalities on charging first though.

I'm with you on this one OP. I would be annoyed too.

@WorraLiberty loads of people on here already know what to do - they just start threads for the validation. Or because the people involved are taking the piss leading them to doubt whether they have a point.

Also in general it’s not BU to be annoyed that someone else is using something you’re paying for. It would be nice to subsidise people but it’s not mandatory. It’s a favour and you can feel whatever you want about it unless the other person is in a lesser situation.

*or you owe then

Someone posted: 'This way she owes him'.

I don't think it's like that. He's not a vindictive person or someone who keeps score like that.

The question about piggybacking off the software, to use an analogy, it's a bit like commonly-used software which can be either single or multi user. But it's not quite like that as it's industry-specific software. It can be either essential to the business, or a useful add-on, depending on which services you offer to clients. Our male friend uses it for his own benefit. He's not in business.

@User17292127

Someone posted: 'This way she owes him'.

I don't think it's like that. He's not a vindictive person or someone who keeps score like that.

The question about piggybacking off the software, to use an analogy, it's a bit like commonly-used software which can be either single or multi user. But it's not quite like that as it's industry-specific software. It can be either essential to the business, or a useful add-on, depending on which services you offer to clients. Our male friend uses it for his own benefit. He's not in business.

Is it legal to charge someone to use it?

1st how much is she actually using the software? Is it just occasionally so not really worth buying for her? Or is she using it daily to be able to do her work?

2nd It sounds like she is a client or works for a client. Does letting her use the software increase you chances of getting more work?Is your DH trying to keep her happy in the hopes she will send more work your way?

For example I have Adobe Creative Cloud for my work. If a client who I worked with a lot wanted access so that they can occasionally make some small adjustments to my work I would be okay with that. If they then used it to produce work of their own I would not be happy with that.

Be very careful we fell foul of the Adobe licensing police due to lending someone an old PC that had an expired Adobe license on it, something they did activated adibe monitoring software and DH was forced by Adobe to pay a six figure sum for a full professional license for a product he no longer needed to avoid a court case and even bigger fine.
DH should have cleaned out the PC of course but it was all done in a hurry as our friend had his computer fail right before a deadline and DH was very busy too.
To sum up, make sure if you stop paying for a multiple user license that all users remove relevant files from their computer and don't use pirate copies because the person who signs the user agreement is liable for misuse.