Moments from past relationships which make you “wtf was that about?” when you look back?

[Ithinkyoullbejustfine]

I’ll start...

ExDH would get in a massive sulk if I took a days annual leave and he wasn’t off too - to the point where on occasion he would ring in sick just to be home as well. He’d go on and on how I must have more annual leave days than I was telling him I did because I always seemed to be off?!

Silent treatment for days on end because DC and I went out with friends, the traffic coming back was horrendous so we were very late getting back

Anyone else?

Complained he was ‘bored’
While I was in labour with his son
And he meant it when I should have ‘hurried up’ pushing his child out

Stole my money and spent it on booze-to the point I had nothing to give my lot for dinner

Sent me to the shop to buy cider-when I was a week from giving birth
But he had the kids while I went-wasn’t he good?

Stalked me round town for the whole weekend (he claimed he’d gone to grannies)
Told me word for word what I’d done all weekend

Punched a male friend for saying hi to me in the street

Would take my wages out of the bank-and I’d be allowed an allowance-he refused to work

Many many more-I pity who he’s with now

Oh my I'm so sorry you've all gone through this but glad to hear it was all ex's.

many many things my ex has done but the absolute worst one was me agreeing to pee on him as a compromise for not wanting to try anal sex to stop his sulking 🤢🤢🤢

@SilentPanic this makes me so sad. Shows what emotional torture can do to a woman's self-esteem.

You will have the last laugh my friend x

I had one ex bf when I was in my teens that still makes me think WTF.

He would start arguments over the weirdest things. One day, walking down the road and he spotted a personalised car number plate that said 'Hi the' we were chatting and I mentioned whether it was meant to be 'Hi There' or related to Hythe, the place. He paused and asked me what it spelled backwards, I looked at him and said it didn't spell anything backwards. He starts falling about laughing and saying how stupid I was for even considering that it spelled anything backwards and like it was the most hysterically funny moment ever. I was a bit WTF and he started arguing with me that I had no sense of humour and that I was stupid for pausing before replying. I still see the same number plate sometimes when I'm back visiting my parents and I remember that fucking ridiculous twat of an ex when I see it.

The same idiot also took an overdose the night before one of my A levels as I wanted to stay home and do some last minute revision. He's about 46 now, bankrupt, divorced with a succession of short term girlfriends who get fed up with him living at home with his mother.

I had the most awful boyfriend as a teenager, on my birthday his sister bought me some makeup (she was lovely) and it was some designer brand. I didn't know what it was and he spent the next few weeks telling what an awful excuse for a woman I was for not understanding designers!!!!
That a million awful things like lifting up my clothes in front of his friends, cheating and generally being an awful human...when i think know how he was in his 20s and living at home with his mother....what a lucky escape!!!!!!!

@Alwaystired4
lifting up my clothes in front of his friends
What the actual?!

Ew i know right!!!! I think we've all had lucky escapes on this thread!!

Went to shop for some cheese and then on a 2 day bender.

Went to walk dog, took dog on a bender, his mate brought dog back after 3 hours.

Kicked off to spend all our savings from joint account then kicked off when it was gone.

Didn't want me buying a horse (out of my money) and paying for livery (out of my money) as it reduced our spending money. I didn't spend anything he did on beer.

What a wanker.

He got caught speeding, he was alone driving I was at home 60miles away but it was my fault apparently and I even apologised.

My ex, 12 yes ago when i was 18, cheated on me loads but I fell for his bullshit even when I'd seen evidence. Worst thing was, we worked at the same place, a supermarket and he managed to convince all my friends there I was a crazy psycho and they all turned against me. By the end I just couldnt trust anyone. Wrecked my trust in people permanently

Wouldnt put up with that kind of shit from a partner, colleagues or friends ever again

I had an ex who didn’t drive and would basically guilt trip me to do an hour and a half round trip to have his haircut which he always booked for 8am on a Saturday! I refused once and he stayed at his parents for a week ... god knows what he told them!!

I once went on a hen do one Friday night and he still booked his haircut for 8am that Saturday, stupid me wanting an easily like was home in bed for 10pm!

Test

Ex boyfriend made all the running until he got me then presented me with a complete list of dating rules, no touching, no kissing, then no sex. I had to travel all the way to North London to see him where he wouldn't have got out of bed, showered or dressed. I could be in the same room as him but not approach him. The cost of all meals out where to be shared although he earned a lot more than me and I treated him to meals. If we went to visit his parents in Cornwall he left me with them all day to visit an ex girlfriend. The one valentines gift he bought me was in his bag over there and go get it yourself. I often wonder which circle of hell his current partner is in with him. I doubt he ever got married.

I was at uni and living with my ex who was a lazy bastard. He was from a single parent household and had dyslexia so able to live off of a full loan and grants whereas I had wealthy parents who didn’t give me anything so I had no choice but to work pretty much full time.

He only made it through uni because of me. In the holidays I’d get home from a full days work to find him in his dressing gown having only just got up and then I’d make his dinner! He never lifted a finger and I did every single one of the chores.

The moment that I look back on and think wtf was I doing with him was one day when I’d gone to do the big food shop. He’d promised to come and meet me on his bike to help carry the bags home. Only he didn’t want to get out of bed so refused so I struggled the 20 minutes home with all the bags. Then when I got there I asked if he’d come down and help me carry them up the stairs (we lived on the 5th floor) and still he refused.

I can’t believe I wasted some of the best years of my life being mum to that arsehole who never did anything for me. Makes me so sad to think back to how naive and pathetic I was.

We'd just got together & he "got" me to type up his dissertation, promising he'd help me with mine. His idea of helping was getting his mum to write out some information from a book that wasn't even relevant, then dumping me 2 weeks before mine was due in, because he fancied a girl at his Unnamed Hobby. She wasn't interested (or that's what he said) & stupid me got back with him.

Forgot to get me a Christmas present. Yep I was certainly a priority!

Smirking about how my parents "didn't seem to like you very much" because they'd emigrated.

Not giving me an early lift to the bus station in the dark a week after I'd been followed home and threatened with assault (when I'd moved to his home town a few hundred miles from mine).
That was my first bf.

I wish MN had been around back then/ I'd had some idea of boundaries.

When I was 14 I hung around at a local park and started seeing a 17 year old. I know, I know! I wasn't that into him and just had a bit if a laugh with him and didn't think much of it. I went to meet him one day, we'd been together 1 month, he said he had a surprise for me. He had tattooed my name (himself) down his arm! It was awful, made me panic and feel sick. I finished with him 2 weeks later and my Dad had to warn him off me.

I was 18, lived alone, minimum wage job. He was older, almost a 6 figure salary but expected me to pay for our meals both at my flat and on dates and asked for fuel money. He also looked down his nose at my job because it wasn't anything glamorous and involved getting mucky.

His wife divorced him messily and took him for everything he had and now he's a window cleaner and lives on the same street as my first flat ( a crappy, run-down area he used to sneer at).

Considering my now husband is a farmer, isn't a dick and wouldn't sneer at a neighbourhood, I don't know what I was thinking!

A bit random - I was seeing someone I knew from work who was older than me, and I was totally in thrall. He didn’t want anyone to know about our relationship - fair enough, don’t want people from work to know yet, etc.

We were any for a weekend together, doing some fairly risky walking/scrambling. You’re supposed to let someone know your routes before you go, just in case. After one slightly hairy day, he phoned to say we were safe, and I realised he’d pretended he was alone. So, if anything had happened, no bloody mountain rescue for me!! I brushed it off at the time, but really should have seen it as massive indicator he was a selfish bellend. Now I absolutely think WTF!

From current relationship, a couple of years ago.
I was wfh, finished at 5, made tea quickly (fishfingers, chips and beans, don't judge!) and left to take my inlaws shopping.
When I returned, dh and dss (24!) looked so hard done by because dh had "expected there to be some beans!" Whereupon I directed him to the microwave.

Obviously what I should have said was "I'm hearing that 2 adults are incapable of heating a tin of beans. I'm embarrassed for you. What I should have heard was 'thank you for preparing tea before taking my parents shopping' I'll call them right now and you'll explain why you'll be taking them shopping from now on".

I still get the rage about it now from time to time but its too long ago to bring it up (& remembering dss general uselessness about the house still pisses me off even though he's moved out thank heavens).

I feel lucky compared to many people on this thread!

My first boyfriend used to have rank breath because (as he proudly told me) he'd worked out that if he ate a mint he didn't need to bother cleaning his teeth I went out with him for 3 years!!

As a student age 19-21. We were in a commited relationship that was 'open' in that we could have one night stands with others. I was fine with this arrangement.

Would constantly comment on other women and how they dressed sexier than me. Tried to pressure me into wearing revealing clothing which I declined.

On several occasions would come home for dinner after agreeing the time only to say he had just eaten fast food and wasn't hungry.

Once I turned down a guy who was hitting on me and ex spent all night encouraging him to keep persisting.

Frequently went on ridiculous benders.

When I was really ill with Swine Flu, refused to pick up my prescription for Tamiflu. I had to walk to the pharmacy (took me an hour when normally a 10 min stroll) then had to wait outside as I was infectious. I was told off by pharmacist for not sending someone else.

I dumped him when he decided he wanted to keep seeing someone he had slept with. She was the first one who wanted to keep dating him. I was as I had many others who would have liked that but I stuck to the rules religiously.

In hindsight, he was a cunt from the start.

My ex was a right drama queen looking back at it.

He had a 'sensitive stomach' and one time while he was at work he sent me a video of a toilet bowl, said 'THIS IS WHY I SHOULDN'T EAT CHIPS' before a load of vomit appeared. He was filming himself being sick. Such a weirdo.

By far not the worse thing he did but for some reason that's always stuck in my mind.

My teenage ex told me he had cancer when I tried to dump him. And his family went along with it for many weeks.

Similarly, my DH's ex told him that she was the same age as him when they met. Her family threw her a 21st party for a select few people. He then found out that she was only just 18 months later when she was in hospital .

People are wild.

First boyfriend on gap year turned into prize wanker after he secured me.

Coerced me into giving my virginity to him and then told everyone in the pub about it.

I broke my little toe and he told me to 'just wear trainers ' because he wanted to go out dancing.

Used to pull my dress up to show everyone my underwear when we went dancing.

Joined another couple for their anniversary dinner where he got drunk and started throwing food at me because he thought it was funny.

Tell me on umpteen occasions to get ready to go out somewhere and then not turn up.

Would roll in drunk later and then wake me up to pick a fight.

Bought me a five dollar plastic photo wallet for my twenty-first birthday after he had taken two hundred dollars of my birthday money to buy new tyres for his car.

Persuaded me to move into another apartment with a friend because we weren't getting on , then moved another girl into our bed the same night, didn't even change the sheets.

Asked me for my share of the rent money but didn't hand it over to the landlord. Spent it himself.

Would take out tabs at the local shops who would then hassle me for the money when I went in.

Probably sold the watch I bought him for Christmas to buy drugs, said he lost it. I never received a Christmas card or gift from him ever.

Blamed me for his suicide attempt five years before we met!

Exh was away on a business trip and became unreachable for 2 days. I absolutely freaked out because the last time we spoke he was on a night out and had said 'it's quite rough here, there's already been one fight..' and of course I was worried sick.

When he finally did call I had been close to filing him as a missing person. He said he had absolutely no idea what had happened in the last 48 hours. Remembered being blind drunk and the next thing (apparently) it was 2 days later and he woke up in bed in his hotel. Swore he'd woken up alone though. He came home a couple of days later and the first thing he said was he wanted to show me something he'd found on his back but not to jump to any 'silly' conclusions. Well his back was covered in long red scratches. He swore up and down he hadn't cheated but admitted he couldn't remember the last 48 hours.

Like an idiot, I stuck it out for another 2 years after that. It was only after I left that he admitted he'd had a threesome during that 'lost' 48 hours, with 2 women he picked up in the club. He'd switched his phone off so I couldn't 'spoil the experience' WTF