Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Bought a dog - person wants it back..aibu?

459 replies

mrsdaz · 17/04/2021 15:19

I bought a dog 2 days ago from a lovely lady who was finding it hard to manage him due to working full time etc.

Agreed sale on Tuesday, collected him Thursday evening. All well. She has been in touch since by text to see how he is.

Yesterday got a text saying she's missing the dog and would have him back in a heartbeat.

Today I've had a text message from her daughter asking for the dog back. Plus subsequent phone call that I didn't answer.

Aibu to keep the dog? He's so happy and isn't pining for previous home etc. He will be with someone all the time rather than alone all day and has a companion dog here.

Who would give the dog back?

OP posts:
Harmonypuss · 20/04/2021 04:07

@BlueDahlia69
@Ddot
@Strangeways19
@Sparklfairy
@ProfessorInkling

Thank you all for your kind thoughts and words.
It does still hurt and cause a great many tears whenever I think of him but as you say, I did the right thing, I know he had a really good life and some of that is down to me.
Something I missed out on that post was that 3 days after I'd taken my boy up to Manchester, my neighbour saw me in the street and said...
"I've not heard your dog for a few days"
"No, you wouldn't have because you've got what you wanted, he's not here any more, well done"
"What do you mean?"
"I've had to give him away to someone else before you and the council have him destroyed, so as I said, well done, I hope you're happy now".
i walked away and I didn't speak to her for 7yrs, by which time I'd got another dog, a spaniel this time, now she's really friendly, as though she hadn't put me through this trauma. She's fine with my spaniel (now 7yrs old) even given him a scruff in the street a couple of times. I'm civil with her, speak in a friendly way when I see her on the street or if one of us accepts a delivery for the other but I'll never forget what she did.
Funnily enough, my spaniel behaves in the exact same way as my gorgeous German Shepherd did, he's usually really quiet but he barks if he hears someone knocking a front door (any one of 4 houses, not just mine) and he barks like crazy if someone comes down our back entry or if the local kids decide they want to play on the roof of the garages ....
Exactly the same!
It probably annoys my neighbour but I don't think she would dare to try it again.

Suzi888 · 20/04/2021 04:26

I wouldn’t feel too guilty, she sounds easy come, easy go to me! She will probably just get another dog and regret that decision too.

Taikoo · 20/04/2021 05:21

She's been offered more money for the dog elsewhere.
Block her and then you don't have to deal with her any more.
She's an idiot.
Poor dog. Not even house trained. That's pathetic.
Sounds like the dog is better off with you.

scubadive · 20/04/2021 12:45

Dont be unkind and ignore all the unforgiving intolerant posters on here.

Give the dog back, she made a mistake and is missing her dog terribly. You have only had him a few days, it’s no big deal for you, you can buy another dog, where is your humanity.

What has happened to humanity and forgivenesses.

AryaStarkWolf · 20/04/2021 13:07

@scubadive

Dont be unkind and ignore all the unforgiving intolerant posters on here.

Give the dog back, she made a mistake and is missing her dog terribly. You have only had him a few days, it’s no big deal for you, you can buy another dog, where is your humanity.

What has happened to humanity and forgivenesses.

The woman probably only owned him for 6 months herself and has told the OP she had to sell him because no one is home with all day, the text messages haven't stated that those circumstances had changed so the dog is far better off with OP
abricotine · 20/04/2021 13:11

@scubadive if a genuine mistake how do you explain the dog had no training at nine months old?

scubadive · 20/04/2021 13:23

@abricotine you have only ops word for that.

The op said the previous owner was a lovely lady. The dog wasn’t house trained and yet immediately she took ownership it has not had on accident, that sounds pretty house trained to me.

Op is clearly trying to justify to herself why the dog is better with her and that is possible but it still is showing no humanity for the previous owner.

Taikoo · 20/04/2021 13:25

@scubadive

Dont be unkind and ignore all the unforgiving intolerant posters on here.

Give the dog back, she made a mistake and is missing her dog terribly. You have only had him a few days, it’s no big deal for you, you can buy another dog, where is your humanity.

What has happened to humanity and forgivenesses.

Oh come on, don't be a nob.
TheGumption · 20/04/2021 13:29

I think the original owners daughter found the post 🙄

Aprilshowersandhail · 20/04/2021 13:32

Unless the op admits the ddog is sat pining at the door why should she not keep him? I got a dpuppy before there was a sniff of Covid. She has been basic trained by me only but sure as hell is house trained..
Class have restarted now and she has a start date. The previous owner of op's ddog didn't give training a chance - straight to selling... Grim.

mrsdaz · 20/04/2021 13:49

@TheGumption

I think the original owners daughter found the post 🙄
I was just thinking that!! A second family member has sent a not nice message basically insinuating that we are bad people for not giving him back.
OP posts:
LoudestCat14 · 20/04/2021 14:00

Ignore the message, OP, and Scubadive. The owner sold him because she knew she wasn't looking after him properly because she was out of the house all day. She might be missing him but her work circumstances won't have changed in 48 hours and chances are if you send him back she'll flipflop and sell him again, only this time it might not be to someone who is prepared to put the work in like you are and who doesn't have a companion dog for him. If the family continues to harass you, contact the local police for advice.

AryaStarkWolf · 20/04/2021 14:12

I was just thinking that!! A second family member has sent a not nice message basically insinuating that we are bad people for not giving him back.

Have you updated his chip?

CutieBear · 20/04/2021 14:18

@scubadive are you the lady who sold the dog? Who’s to say you won’t be fed up with the dog a few months down the line and try to sell the dog for more money?

Aprilshowersandhail · 20/04/2021 14:35

Don't reply op. Bet they don't know the full story.
You have done nothing wrong by taking and keeping the ddog.
Bet you if you handed it back it would be advertised for the full £500 by tonight..

babbaloushka · 20/04/2021 14:39

@scubadive

Dont be unkind and ignore all the unforgiving intolerant posters on here.

Give the dog back, she made a mistake and is missing her dog terribly. You have only had him a few days, it’s no big deal for you, you can buy another dog, where is your humanity.

What has happened to humanity and forgivenesses.

Why can't you DM get another pet that she can actually adequately care for? Not the OP's fault, the dog is living a happy life with her now.
JustSleepAlready · 20/04/2021 14:45

Don’t give the dog back. It’s heartbreaking for previous owner, but they reached a stage where their life wasn’t compatible with having a dog. They are hurt and sad and grieving the dog right now. It’s such a difficult decision to make. But if the dog is happy with you, and you paid for the dog , keep it. It’s unfair to pass the dog about and Unsettle it further. Ina weeks time she may decide she can’t cope again and get rid of the dog. I think it’s a knee jerk reaction. Explain the dog is happy and healthy and settled. Then cut off communication. Don’t give them your address.

OrangeRug · 20/04/2021 15:06

Do not give the dog back! If she's genuine and does actually feel regret and misses him I do feel some sympathy for her but it sounds like the dog is far better off with you. You paid for him, you drove a long way and she expects you to just jump when she changes her mind? Idiots who got lockdown animals they couldn't care for long term piss me right off. And honestly it wouldn't surprise me to see her advertising him for more money if you did give him back. I would message her and state firmly that if you receive any more messages from her or her family you'll report them for harassment.

Ddot · 20/04/2021 15:08

GIVE IT BACK, GIVE IT BACK!
SHE SOLD THAT PUPPY WITHOUT VETTING NEW OWNER.
NO NO NO NO NO WHO DOES THAT!
ITS ALL ABOUT CASH

Ddot · 20/04/2021 15:11

Calm now!
It's a living feeling creature not a pair of trousers. You should never sell animals without getting new owner. The horrible stories I've heard would turn your blood to ice. Keep it or take to RSPCA

bambootle · 20/04/2021 15:23

@scubadive

Dont be unkind and ignore all the unforgiving intolerant posters on here.

Give the dog back, she made a mistake and is missing her dog terribly. You have only had him a few days, it’s no big deal for you, you can buy another dog, where is your humanity.

What has happened to humanity and forgivenesses.

It's been trivialised by folk like you twattering on like an internet meme. You'll bring Caroline Flack into it in a minute.
osbertthesyrianhamster · 20/04/2021 15:28

I was just thinking that!! A second family member has sent a not nice message basically insinuating that we are bad people for not giving him back.

I hope you kept all these messages and blocked the senders. Any more and I'd go to the police. The fuck I'd give that dog back.

BRB2021 · 20/04/2021 15:41

@Ddot

GIVE IT BACK, GIVE IT BACK! SHE SOLD THAT PUPPY WITHOUT VETTING NEW OWNER. NO NO NO NO NO WHO DOES THAT! ITS ALL ABOUT CASH
I thought this was going to be a poem, so I started to read in in a "poemy" way. Very disappointing
BigButtons · 20/04/2021 15:58

If they carry on tell them you will report them for harassment. Or simply block them all. Or do both. There are some real loony bins out there.

RedcurrantPuff · 20/04/2021 16:06

YANBU, tell them to fuck off. Keep a close eye on him in case they try and steal him.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.