To let my dog bark for an extra half hour even though the neighbour was already annoyed

[Candlestand]

I have 2 dogs, DH usually takes them to work so Mon-Fri they're never here during the day. Due to a bit of excess faffing yesterday morning he forgot them. Normally he puts them in the dog box in the car and sorts out DD and they all head off to nursery then work but somehow yesterday he just forgot he hadn't already put them in the car and I got a text from DH to tell me the dogs were still in the garden. Fine. I'm up in my office, WFH, the back door is open as it was such a nice day, they can mooch in and out as they please and we'll just walk them tonight instead.
I work for the local authority and we've had a nasty incident occur with a safeguarding issue for a child and I was part of back to back meetings so I never even went down for a cup of tea. I'm then in a meeting that I have been volunteered as minute taker for and there are over 20 people in this meeting and that's when my neighbour starts banging on my door. Initially I ignore him thinking it's a delivery and I can't leave this meeting but he is now practically pounding my door down so I race to the other room to open the window to ask them to go away whatever it is and he starts swearing that the dogs are barking and its really annoying. I shout down that I'm sorry but I'm in a meeting and I will sort them out as soon as I'm out of it. I can see he's furious and he storms off still swearing but the meeting is still going on without me and I have to be in it. I'm now vaguely aware that my younger dog is barking because it's been brought to my attention but honestly I just hadn't noticed before because it had been such a busy morning so I don't know how long they had been barking for. I didn't want to disrupt the meeting by asking for a break because there was a lot going on in it and we were, I hoped, almost finished but it turned out we were still going half an hour later before the meeting actually finished and because I'm now aware of it I can hear the dog still barking on and off for that time.
The thing is, we have a big garden and they don't come in when called straight away because it becomes a game to them so although me being out in the garden with them stopped the barking it takes me over 5 minutes to get them to come into the house (which I knew it would and why I didn't want to stop in the middle of a very large meeting to chase around my garden for ages). I appreciate it must have been annoying and I could see my neighbours over our fence so when I could go get them I apologised properly and tried to explain that I couldn't leave the meeting to come and get them and they were furious with me and said I was ruining their day. They are retired and are always in their garden. My dog was actually barking at their dog who was sat with them and my little dog could smell him, the older one wasn't actually barking. I tried to explain that he was just excited by their dog and if they had taken their dog in, he would have stopped barking but this just made them angrier (I meant it to try and break the tension as a discussion rather than a criticism of them, though clearly I misjudged how to say that) as they said why shouldn't their dog be allowed outside when he's being well behaved. I apologised again and just got back to chasing the dogs into the house and went back to work.

I appreciate it was annoying but I'm not sure they needed to be quite so angry. It was the middle of the day, this never normally happens at all because the dogs are not here during the week and at the weekend we're both able to be much more atuned to them if one of them starts barking at another dog or a squirrel or something and it has never been an issue before. We live rurally so other than the house on the other side of our neighbours theres no one else to be upset by the barking.
WIBU to put work before my neighbours enjoyment of their garden for half an hour?

@Marilla27

Our lives were ruined when a woman with a small yappy dog (Pomeranian) rented next door and let her dog bark at all hours. My neighbours who had two small children ended up selling up and moving as every time they would put the kids to bed a few hours later she would let her dog out (it seemed to bark at anything). Her dog made our lives hell for the two years that she lived there. OP, please take the time to get your dogs properly trained (it's your responsibility, otherwise don't have them) and stop being so inconsiderate.

Are you honestly comparing a two year problem to a one off incident?

@KarmaStar

Read the OP, the very point of it is that the dogs weren’t in the car.

I think as a one off, under the circumstances, the neighbours could have been a little more tolerant and forgiving tbh.

OP, I say this gently but are you ok generally? It just seems you’re spiralling really quickly from a fairly innocuous aibu post. Unless it’s extreme sarcasm which you can’t tell in text form.

You’ll always get the extremes here especially with dogs.

Focusing on this situation, it was an error of judgement, it’s not the end of the world but you do need to take ownership of it. You don’t need to make a rash decision to get rid of the dogs, you just need to assess how home working with dogs looks so you, the neighbours and the dogs are all happy.

So the dogs aren’t usually at home, you just need to prepare when they are. Have a “working with the dog” checklist or something to make it easier for you. Have I brought the dogs inside? Check. Are the dogs fed and watered? Check. Do the dogs have toys or an activity they can do unsupervised? Check. Then go into the meeting. It’s part and parcel of working from home. Leaving them unsupervised when you physically can’t check them is asking for trouble as they could get injured, escape etc.

You then need to tackle the training. You work full time but you don’t work all the time. It’s tiring and a pain in the arse but that’s dog ownership. Even 15 minutes a day will help. Dogs bark, but what WE do as their owner is important.

We have loads of cats and squirrels and birds my dog will bark at, combined with industrial units over the railway line at the bottom of the garden, there’s lots of noises for him to bark at. As soon as I hear him bark I’m up and tell him quiet (calmly never tell them off when recalling) and recall him inside so he’s in for 20 minutes. I’ll let him back out and again, as soon as he barks he’s in and not allowed out. He’s an absolute garden dog and would live outside I think given the choice but since his favourite thing is restricted when he does bark he’s learning that quiet = garden and barking = inside. The key is being shit hot on the barking. You’ll need to work on the recall. Treats are your friend and never tell them off when you recall. Google desensitisation for the dog next door, positive reinforcement will work wonders. Chasing the dogs around the garden can be a fun game if your recall is good, because then you running after them is just chase game. We run around like loons after ours as he loves it but never when we cell him to us. A trick is to run in the opposite direction they’ll chase you

You can do it you (and your husband!) need to put the work in.

Dogs bark, its natural, but I get its annoying after a few minutes without being called in, but if you were unaware 🤷‍♂️.
The neighbour aggressively banging on your door and swearing was out of order, a polite knock and request to stop your dogs barking woukd of been a good starting point.

You sound like a child having a tantrum now.

"Okay I'll get just rid of them, etc etc."

Just be more aware next time.

Not sure why you are being slated on here OP. I can understand your neighbours being unhappy if it was a regular event, but for a one-off they were over the top.

Seriously I wouldn't take them a bottle of wine, your dog barked for a while in the middle of the day - once! It really doesn't make you a bad neighbour.

No I wouldn't take them a bottle of wine either.

I'm not being sarcastic. I asked for opinions and I got them. I just wasn't expecting so many people to highlight that actually what I thought was about a relatively low level issue between me and the neighbour was actually something so much worse because I missed the point that actually I can't look after my dogs properly and work. We depend on DH taking them to work and that has been working but one occasion where that couldn't happen and everything went wrong so how can I make things right if it is true that actually I can't care for my dogs and keep working. I've only just returned from work from mat leave so this is all new to me, working from home wasn't something I ever did before and I don't see how I can actually address these issues when we usually rely on DH taking them to work but what if that couldn't happen?

@Roszie

You sound like a child having a tantrum now.

"Okay I'll get just rid of them, etc etc."

Just be more aware next time.

Why? She's agreeing with a shockingly high number of posts on here. Surely it can't be fine for posters to pile in but not when the OP agrees with them?

Appalling: dogs bark because they are concerned, anxious, upset, something's not right.

So apart from your unreasonable behaviour towards your neighbour, you allowed your dogs to suffer. You neglected to care properly for them.

Jesus MN, it was a 1 off.

Clearly a dog barking non stop for that long is extremely annoying and antisocial irrespective of whether it's a one off

I agree it’s annoying but at face value it’s a one off and the OP’s neighbours have no reason to think it’s going to be a regular problem if it hasn’t been previously. Tbh I’d be more worried my neighbour had been hurt or something if their usually benign dog kept barking.

It wasn’t unreasonable of them to knock but there was no need for the continuation of their sulking. It impacted one morning for them. If it made sitting outside that unpleasant for them then, as a one off, they should have gone inside. Why stay in a situation that’s doing nothing but piss you off?

@Candlestand - get a dog Walker/doggy day care - try them out once a week for a while so that you have options if your husband can't take them to work.

It's not the end of the world - just needs a bit of planning.

If this is a recent thing because you have just moved house you need to nip it in the bud quickly before it becomes a habit.

Train it, and until it is trained do not put it in the garden unsupervised.

Oh my god. Are you always this hysterical?
JUST TRAIN THEM.

OP: my barking dogs annoyed my neighbours

MN: you are a terrible neglectful owner who shouldn't have dogs if you can't look after them

OP: OK, I should get rid of the dogs

MN: don't be ridiculous and childish!!!

seriously MN, what the actual fuck.

And high value treats by the back door which they get every single time they come when called.

The Op is responding to the hysteria on the thread - it's not surprising really.

@MeltsAway

Appalling: dogs bark because they are concerned, anxious, upset, something's not right.

So apart from your unreasonable behaviour towards your neighbour, you allowed your dogs to suffer. You neglected to care properly for them.

A barking dog is not necessarily suffering or neglected. Barking is normal dog behaviour and they do it for many other reasons too, as in this case.

Of corse you were unreasonable. Barking dogs are incredibly annoying. Why don’t you train them to come when told? That’s outrageous that they ‘make a game of it’. Ours are trained to come with a knock on the window.

The levels of outrage on this thread are ridiculous.

@Lockheart Yes!

If dh can't take them to work then you use doggy day care or just have them inside with you.
Dh takes our 1yo dog for a walk in the morning, lunchtime and evening. The rest of the time he'd quite happy lying under the dining room table while dh works.

I thought YABU but that you were getting a bit of a hard time until I saw all these “I’m a terrible person I’ve ruined their lives and I MUST get rid of the dogs!!” self pitying posts which you’ve obviously posted for sympathy. No one is saying you’re a terrible person and it’s literally a minority of comments saying that it sounds like you don’t have time for the dogs. Grow up.

Oh wow op I think your getting a hard time if what you said is true about your dogs not being left to bark.
I'm surprised your neighbour wasnt worried instead of pissed off. Both my neighbours have dogs but arent left to bark for more than a couple of minutes without being told to shut up so if it went on for half an hour or more ide be banging the door to check they were ok.
Agree with others pop round with a bottle of wine, apologise and tell them it was a one off them being there at that time of day with no supervision