To think the male GP just mansplained?

[FuckingFabulous]

I have called today to speak to a GP because for the last eight months I've been having an issue with my periods. Rather than a light to medium flow for five days , I've been having a light flow for five, a crazy heavy flow for one abs then back to light for three days. And I mean crazy heavy. I know many women have it worse but on that day I'm changing super plus tampons every 40 minutes and waking up absolutely flooded three times a night. I feel light headed and trembly on this day and the two days after too, and I get a lot of sparkly/flashing lights in my vision for about a week after.

So. GP. I called the GP when the second period was like it and was told to monitor it for six months. By a male GP, just in the interest of full disclosure. I called again today. And the GP told me I should consider myself lucky that the full eight days aren't like it and what I need to realise about the menstrual cycle is that all women have a varied cycle and sometimes it's extremely heavy and sometimes it's extremely light. It's all normal. I said I didn't find it normal to be bleeding through super plus protection in under an hour, despite it only being a 24-36 hrs event in my monthly cycle. I use more protection in that one day than I do in the seven others! And the feeling of being so light headed for days and the visual aura make me feel unsafe to drive. I explained that I literally go wobbly and start to get that darkening at the edge of my vision so need to put my head between my legs, multiple times a day. He sighed and said "oh, I'm afraid it's part of the trials of being female. You'll get used to it. There's nothing I can suggest except take yourself to bed with a hot water bottle or go out for a jog."

What. The .Fuck?! Firstly, I'm a mother of three and can't just fuck off to bed. Go out for a jog when I'm bleeding like I just gave birth?? And I've been having periods for 25 years- I know what they are! Get used to it, indeed.

I'm so annoyed. Years ago I had Mefanemic acid or something similarly named for heavy bleeding, but apparently now there's "nothing" and I'm to just appreciate that it's not for the full eight days.

AIBU to be pissed with his attitude?

I would be seeking a second opinion from another GP who deals with 'womens' issues' .
You should at least be offered a scan just in case you have fibroids.
If in doubt check it out. Good luck.

What a prick

My male GP once laughed at me because I said I didn’t fancy the idea of having a coil inserted

You are right and he is wrong fucking twat

Call and ask for another appt with a female doctor arse

My friends sister got similarly fobbed off for months by her male GP, by the time she went to A+E as she passed out at home, they had to take her for an emergency hysterectomy, once they opened her up, they discovered cervical cancer that had spread to her liver and closed her up again. She died 2 days later. I'm not for a minute suggesting you have anything as serious as this, it's an extreme example, but change your GP at the very minimum, he sounds like a dinosaur and you can definitely find a better one

YANBU!

Go to a different doctor, preferably female. I know of a few women who were diagnosed with endometriosis and it took them forever to get anyone to listen. You know your own body and don’t let anyone try and fob you off.

I'd be tempted to bag up all the pads and bring him in to him, drop the bag on his desk and just say "1 days worth. Now are you listening?" but it is much more sensible to complain and see someone else..

First see another GP, get yourself sorted first that’s the priority. You need a thorough assessment, probably a gynae referral.
And then put in a formal written complaint. Make sure they follow it up.
What an utter twat. I’m so angry for you!

I think you should complain and see another doctor or go to A+E and tell them why you're there (i.e. unhelpful/lazy GP)

I just got a new prescription for mefenamic acid, so of course you can get it.

Also: yes, he mainsplained, and yes, you should tear him a new one. If he were bleeding from his penis, would he expect a doctor to take him seriously if he explained it was abnormal FOR HIM? Personally I think you did exceptionally well not to rip him a new one then and there. I would have done. What a clown. Man Know Best!

Please do not put up with this. Make another apt and ask for it to be with whichever gp at your practice has an interest in this area.

It was only after I had my hysterectomy that a realised quite how grim my periods had been and I'd put up with it for too long. As women we often just get on with things because we think we have to. You are entitled to access high quality medical care, you have not received that, please try again

Yes thats mansplaining! Go and see someone else and look into getting your hormone/thyroid levels tested, also a hysterscopy to check for fibroids. It is not normal to have a period like that and you need to be your own advocate. I'm sorry you've experienced that, what a bleep!

@2bazookas

Years ago, in a clinic where I'd been referred for excessive menstrual flooding, the male gynae registrar mansplained that an entire period only sheds an eggcupful of blood.

Bloody hell (pun intended) I lose that in about 20 minutes (major flooding)

For 2 days a month I have to wear an ultra tampon, a nighttime towel AND sit/sleep on a folded up bath towel to avoid destroying my sofa or bed because I soak through both in about 45 minutes (or less if flooding occurs)

It took me 6 years of doing battle with my GP(s) to finally get them to refer me, and I have private healthcare so it wasn't even an NHS referral I was after. I had a series of patronising 'that's what periods are like, stop moaning' conversations, it took me sobbing at a locum to get me the magic letter. I found that the women GPs were actually more dismissive of my pain and distress (I suppose because they have periods too)

Turns out I have multiple large fibroids and by the time I got to the consultant had a ferritin level of 0 🤔

There is another way around this.

All the doctors that work at the sexual health clinics are very very well versed in female issues. They have so much more experience than GP's. It's their job.

If you call and get an appointment, they may not be able to prescribe but they can write to your GP suggesting treatment.

It's a polite way to get what you need without creating a fuss.

Appointments are rapid and sometimes the GP just needs another voice of reason.

I don't use the service at all for STI or related issues. I found out about it accidentally decades ago as the health checks they do also cover the health checks you need for IVF. It saved me £400 each cycle! My private consultant was the one who told me about this.

I use the service now as it gets results and I'd rather seem someone who really understands female issues. Especially menopausal female issues.

Nothing to say here but WTF I would be fuming !!

YANBU That’s appalling way to speak to you - completely unacceptable. Can you speak to a female GP? Fact you have a medical history indicating excessive bleeding makes that GP’s attitude even worse.

I haven’t read all the comments so apologies if repeating but you could be peri menopausal yes, although early, I’d ask to speak to a female GP who specialises in this area, a good way to weed them out is to specifically state you want to talk to someone who will discuss HRT with you. And do some research into it as the symptoms are not always what you’d expect or the same as menopause you may be able to spot the signs.. Even if you’re not there yet or it’s something else you will at least talk to someone who can rule it out.. Good luck and definitely push for a proper discussion of all possibilities. Untreated peri menopause can be life changing.

YAN effing BU. I'd be complaining without a second thought.

He needs a kick up the rectum. And you need a referal to gynae female doctor/consultant

YANBU. also. Mefanemic acid was amazing. But I was told they don’t do it anymore on the NHS. however in the interest of full disclosure they did give me naproxen instead.

purplebagladylovesgin makes a good point.
Or ask to see another GP urgently, you've waited long enough. Email them in advance with an outline of the problems, treatment and how you feel the advice given isn't adequate. Put the NICE guidelines in it. I think this is very useful for a GP so they can get a full understanding of the issue and how they have been managed in the past, rather than relying on notes that maybe incomplete or a GP who wasn't listening. This has worked well for people I know who have had complex issues that were just being shunted down the road.

You can complain but IME any GP who is unreasonable and wrong usually doubles down when faced with being questioned.

definitely, make an appointment with a different GP and make a complaint. That GP needs some training. Shocking in this day and age...or not.

YANBU at all. Please get that checked out by a more responsive doctor, ideally a woman. And soon. My mum had something similar to what you describe many years ago. Turned out her womb was full of (thankfully harmless) growths. She ended up having to have it removed.

I have exactly the same issues as you. Thank fuck .thought I was losing my mind. That sparkly vision fainty thing is terrifying. I have been to gp multiple times over last five years and have been given no help. From either male or female docs, just get on with it. Just before lockdown last year around January I'd had enough..wrote a list of all my symptoms and went to doc to get taken seriously. Was given several blood tests (again) I already know I'm anaemic because of this and obvs because of covid nothing else. I have been wfh and I am dreading going back to office at the age of 48 to soak through my clothes like some inexperienced teenager at school. Period pants, three thick towels, two winged towels and towel on my bed is how I try get through the nights. Oh and my period is every 3 weeks now. Cannot wait for full menopause as I am actually at end of my tether. I feel your pain OP. Us women get fucked over all the time with our menstruation, fucking 40 years of misery for most of us. If men had periods the world would have came to a standstill! Rant over 😬

What a dick. I was in so much pain I was losing a week a month to pain. After about a year of 'putting up with it' and some serious painkillers which barely touched it, I had an ablation in my early 40's even though they said I was too young. I'm intending to have any more children and now I don't have periods I've got my life back. Don't suffer or be fobbed off. 💐