To think the male GP just mansplained?

[FuckingFabulous]

I have called today to speak to a GP because for the last eight months I've been having an issue with my periods. Rather than a light to medium flow for five days , I've been having a light flow for five, a crazy heavy flow for one abs then back to light for three days. And I mean crazy heavy. I know many women have it worse but on that day I'm changing super plus tampons every 40 minutes and waking up absolutely flooded three times a night. I feel light headed and trembly on this day and the two days after too, and I get a lot of sparkly/flashing lights in my vision for about a week after.

So. GP. I called the GP when the second period was like it and was told to monitor it for six months. By a male GP, just in the interest of full disclosure. I called again today. And the GP told me I should consider myself lucky that the full eight days aren't like it and what I need to realise about the menstrual cycle is that all women have a varied cycle and sometimes it's extremely heavy and sometimes it's extremely light. It's all normal. I said I didn't find it normal to be bleeding through super plus protection in under an hour, despite it only being a 24-36 hrs event in my monthly cycle. I use more protection in that one day than I do in the seven others! And the feeling of being so light headed for days and the visual aura make me feel unsafe to drive. I explained that I literally go wobbly and start to get that darkening at the edge of my vision so need to put my head between my legs, multiple times a day. He sighed and said "oh, I'm afraid it's part of the trials of being female. You'll get used to it. There's nothing I can suggest except take yourself to bed with a hot water bottle or go out for a jog."

What. The .Fuck?! Firstly, I'm a mother of three and can't just fuck off to bed. Go out for a jog when I'm bleeding like I just gave birth?? And I've been having periods for 25 years- I know what they are! Get used to it, indeed.

I'm so annoyed. Years ago I had Mefanemic acid or something similarly named for heavy bleeding, but apparently now there's "nothing" and I'm to just appreciate that it's not for the full eight days.

AIBU to be pissed with his attitude?

Oh my God OP these fucking GPs! Always make too, fucking always!

Please call and request a female GP. I have done so before because I just can’t with male GPs, it’s like we are an inconvenience. Why do many men go into gynaecology I have no idea because most of them don’t give a stuff and don’t want to even try and understand.

Male*

The wanting to faint is somewhat concerning - maybe connected to the iron.

However, he's not wrong that it's very common for women in their late thirties to experience changes in their menstrual pattern like the ones you describe. It carries on until you stop altogether, lots of blood, lots of giant blood clots, very very heavy some days. Often though not always it's connected to fibroids.

Another doctor might be able to do something for you, or might not. It would also depend on what measures you'd be willing to take. Extra iron is a good idea an might help.

I'd ask friends for a recommendation, I don't find female doctors are any less likely to be dismissive, so if you just choose a woman doctor randomly you are taking your chances.

Clots bigger than a 50p piece and losing large amounts of blood is NOT normal even if you are over 30. Even the nhs website confirms this.

@5zeds

Clots bigger than a 50p piece and losing large amounts of blood is NOT normal even if you are over 30. Even the nhs website confirms this.

It may rather depend on your definition of "not normal". I had one the sze on an egg the other day which along with a toy someone let go down the drain sometime before plugged up my shower.

The reasons is that I have fibroids, which is quite common in women my age. I can manage it, and I'd rather not have surgery, so that's what I do.

Large clots and very heave days with periods is very common in middle aged women, which you will find if instead of looking at a website you ask a group of them.

I know A LOT of over 40s and far too much about abnormal bleeding (which obviously may be the norm for an individual) from both my own and others experience. You can of course choose to pass huge clots and bleed excessively but there are options and most people would like to investigate what those are and make informed decisions.

Yanbu op!! What a twat.

Let’s be honest, any GP who is dismissive of symptoms like yours in your age group is going to be missing a lot of chances to diagnose endometrial, uterine and ovarian cancers as well. *Please note, I am not suggesting that this is what you have got, @FuckingFabulous, I am just suggesting that your GP stating that changes in period patterns as normal is utterly ludicrous and VERY dangerous/negligent!!! If a woman is braving a doctor’s visit in this day and age in the UK, it is something that is obviously affecting her life and should not be bloody minimised!

That’s absolutely not good enough and you should see another doctor.
Regarding the bleeding I had that for the last year or two and my periods seems to have stopped now so it must be menopause for me. I’m twenty years older than you though so I don’t think yours in menopause at all- I’m just saying that I know what the unusual heavy bleeding is like. It feels like you must be losing a lot of blood and I’d feel weak and shaky. Definitely ask for someone else. I totally know what you mean about mansplaining.

@Diverami don’t be hard on yourself. You did what was right at the time. You made the decisions you did with the information you had. I’m glad you’re feeling better.

@SmokedDuck yes, so,you’ve had investigations to determine the cause of your bleeding. So you have fibroids, which aren’t normal by the way. They may be common, that doesn’t make them normal. But you know the reason and any other more sinister reasons have been ruled out. Which is great. OP has not been given that opportunity.

Even if she had fibroids like you, maybe she would make a different decision regarding treatment. Again she hasn’t been given that opportunity to make such a decision.

I went through similar. It was only by speaking to a female doctor that I got anywhere. Does sound like premenopausal, unfortunately. I essentially got graphic with them and said you wouldn't put you with this much diarrhoea! It got so bad I couldn't leave the house, I was literally changing pads every five minutes. I ended up wearing the heavy duty night ones and a tampon. You can get blood thinning pills, but they made it more glupy. Sorry gross I know, but the more woman that talk about this the better. I was only 40! Eventually got put on HRT patches that are working.

Please do respond to the goverment's public consultation on this issue, if you can! This happens to so many women. We need to change it.

www.gov.uk/government/news/government-launches-call-for-evidence-to-improve-health-and-wellbeing-of-women-in-england

consultations.dhsc.gov.uk/talkwomenshealth

Yes, he's a twat. Definitely.

Yep he's a complete dick. I only ever see women about women's problems. At my surgery you can request a particular person to see when you make an appointment, I would specifically ask for a female nurse/doctor. I would be asking for a referral for an ultrasound to check your womb lining and ovaries just to make sure you don't have any fibroids, cysts etc.

Jesus that is appalling!!! To suggest going for a jog when you’re bleeding heavily is just ridiculous, what a twat! It sounds like you’re very anaemic. I have a similar issue where one day (out of 9) is very very heavy. I have a copper coil though as can’t have any form of hormonal contraceptive so this is likely why. I would seek a second opinion from a female GP or ask to be referred to a gynecologist.