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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think peoples attitudes are just going to contribute to more lockdowns?

252 replies

firthy85 · 13/04/2021 05:33

ok. i have always been an advocate to get back our freedom but sensibly. went out yesterday to a local pub for a couple of hours and couldn't believe it. its a great pub lovely atmosphere and staff and has always been a child/dog friendly pub. no social distancing at all, at one point i was squished on a bench between about 5 people. kids running in and out of the pub messing about etc. i totally get that yesterday was a novelty to many people after being locked down since the beginning of november but i feel this total lack of self control is going to end badly for everyone. did you risk going out at all yesterday? aibu?

OP posts:
Original poster
firthy85 · 13/04/2021 10:53

staff did keep coming out with drinks and telling people to sit down and keep kids sat down but you do have to remember what I said above. its an estate drinkers pub not a bar that serves meals just your average working man type pub where the majority of people know each other i think thats why they are not too strict about who sits where. if a staff member sees more than 6 at a table they will say something but they can't physicly force people to move. only real rule is you making sure you sign in either by the app or a signing in book. i do admit to rereading the original post i made and realised it did come across double standards and wingey. but when i said i couldn't believe it i meant it more in a very surprised kind of way how it was like we had gone back to 2019. i would never say i was no more or no less guilty and sorry if thats how it came across.

OP posts:
19thNamechange · 13/04/2021 10:56

We all have to take personal responsibility to make this work. I suppose if you go to a pub and see it is so busy that people are being squished together, the responsible thing to do is to turn around and go home. Just be sensible. I'm off work today but not going to the shops as I'm guessing they'll still be really busy like I've heard they were yesterday. I'm going to wait until the excitement of being allowed out has died down a little. If you are worried OP maybe do the same.

ClarkeGriffin · 13/04/2021 11:00

You were first in the queue to get into the pub on the first day they opened, and have the nerve to complain about others who joined you? Hmm I can't help with stupidity, you're on your own if you can't see the stupidity of that.

KoalaOok · 13/04/2021 11:04

@firthy85

and obviously i am not going to play musical chairs every 5 minutes just because someone i don't know comes a bit too close nobody would. so i don't have the answer genuinely
You could go home? Though you didn't want to waste your £6 cab fare. Your choice.
DadAManger · 13/04/2021 11:06

YANBU

You wanted to go out, as allowed, but were alarmed to see that the pub was not enforcing the rules and that people were not following them themselves. I think it misses the point to say "you could have left" You are legitimately wondering if we will end up in lockdown again, as happened after, for example, "Eat Out to Help Out/Scoff Until You Cough" last year. It's OK to see things in an off/on way for many things in life, but this pandemic is not one of them. Sadly, we cannot all just say "I'm done with it all now, I've had enough" or else we risk being forced to going back to the very lockdown we are "done with". We should surely follow the rules to enjoy the freedoms we are starting to enjoy again? My opinion only of course :)

Sirzy · 13/04/2021 11:14

The fact it’s a drinkers pub is irrelevant. We will be going into a drinkers pub this weekend. They enforce the rules and will refuse service/ask people to leave if they don’t follow it.

If pubs are being greedy and not following the rules then they are part of the problem. If they can’t enforce things they should have stayed shut.

Original poster
firthy85 · 13/04/2021 11:16

@DadAManger thank god for you. someone who has actually understood my post. although alarmed is a bit strong, it was more that i was surprised at how casual it all was with the sitting where they liked, being bunched up to others. and yes i was just legitimately asking what pp thought about it all and what you thought the consequences were. as for going home i will say again. i get taxis everywhere if i am going to play games like that arrive then leave i might aswell flush my cash down the loo.

OP posts:
tttigress · 13/04/2021 11:19

Feel like I am being lied to by the government. We were told the solution was to vaccinate all vunerable people, we have done that, so we should open up completely now.

Bluntness100 · 13/04/2021 11:21

This may win the oddest thread of the week.

You’re saying if everyone continues to behave as you witnesses yesterday then lockdown is in jeapordy, whilst fully admitting you were one of the worst culprits. First in the queue as soon as the pub opened, squished in beside strangers, not complying with the rules and not socialise distancing and loving it by all accounts.

Confused

If you and others like you behaved themselves and complied there would be nothing in jeapordy.

ilovesooty · 13/04/2021 11:21

I understand your post. I'm not dense. Other people understand it. People simply disagree with your approach to the situation.

GiveMeNovocain · 13/04/2021 11:23

No one wants to leave a pub. If you feel uncomfortable then that's your choice though. Stay or go. If we get locked down again because of pub gardens opening and people not distancing that's on you as much as anyone else though.
We won't though as it's perfectly safe to be outside as long as you're not symptomatic. You went out and had a great time. Lovely. You can't ask for sympathy for your decisions.

19thNamechange · 13/04/2021 11:58

I understood your post too. I just think the only way to get some sort of normality back is to be responsible, ie not rushing out, wait until the rush has died down, stay away if it looks too crowded etc. Then hopefully we will not end up in lockdown again. This relies on people having common sense though, and not blaming others when they are the ones not following the rules themselves OP.

AllesAusLiebe · 13/04/2021 12:06

I can't be the only one who thinks that it's desperately sad that for a lot of people with kids, their first recourse when society begins to open up again is, "let's take them to the pub!".

KoalaOok · 13/04/2021 12:10

I have read all your posts, are you including yourself in "peoples attitudes" and "lack of self control"? If so I think I kind of get what you are saying. It is easy to get carried away and enjoy yourself and not be able to tear yourself away when having a good time. Hopefully the clever advisers have thought about this when they came up with their road map.

ClarkeGriffin · 13/04/2021 12:22

[quote firthy85]@DadAManger thank god for you. someone who has actually understood my post. although alarmed is a bit strong, it was more that i was surprised at how casual it all was with the sitting where they liked, being bunched up to others. and yes i was just legitimately asking what pp thought about it all and what you thought the consequences were. as for going home i will say again. i get taxis everywhere if i am going to play games like that arrive then leave i might aswell flush my cash down the loo.[/quote]
We all understand your post. It's not difficult to get.

What's difficult to get is why you are actually alarmed or surprised at it being busy. You literally made sure you were first in the queue for it to open. So you knew you'd have to be early to get in there first for your so desperately needed pint. And then remain surprised at the fact loads of other people wanted to join in, despite the fact you knew you'd have to be early to even get in.

Are you perhaps still drunk and that's why you are making no sense?

islockdownoveryet · 13/04/2021 12:47

@Sugarplumfairy65

I can see another lockdown happening. A close relative lives abroad. Their country opened back up a couple of months ago, everyone went back to work, bars and restaurants were open etc. Now they are back in full lockdown. They are allowed out between 6am and 9am to exercise, they can request permission to go grocery shopping twice per week. They have to carry their permission slips with them when they leave the home. Caught without it and it's arrest.
But have they had 30+ million vaccinated?
Original poster
firthy85 · 13/04/2021 13:11

i know all the staff and quite a lot of the customers. i was actually going to go much later but i enquired to whether they were opening up as its not really a beer garden they have more of a car park which is big enough to put tables and chairs. that was about 12.39 and spoke to landlady who said if i was coming down not to take too long because they were running out of tables and chairs so i thought i may aswell take a look. i was surprised not alarmed but i do understand it kind of came across like i was.

OP posts:
Original poster
firthy85 · 13/04/2021 13:13

@Koalaook yes i was exactly meaning myself also. i fell into the same trap as everyone else. don't feel guilty about it, just reflective in hindsight.

OP posts:
MiddleParking · 13/04/2021 13:25

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

GiveMeNovocain · 13/04/2021 13:44

@AllesAusLiebe

I can't be the only one who thinks that it's desperately sad that for a lot of people with kids, their first recourse when society begins to open up again is, "let's take them to the pub!".
I'm in Wales so over Easter I have taken dd on holiday to North Wales, in mountain walks, woodland walks, stream walks, sheep/lamb walks, castle walks, beach walks and to football class as it's the only thing that's been allowed. We've been to parks, talked, sang and done crafts. I reckon I fully deserve the pint I've got booked across the border on Friday night.
Sirzy · 13/04/2021 13:51

So you admit your inability to follow simple rules contributes to the issue!

User135644 · 13/04/2021 13:59

Why don't you report the pub for breaking the law, rather than complain on here?

User135644 · 13/04/2021 14:11

People get carried away. Wait till the sun comes out again and it'll be 10 x worse. Outdoors is low risk though.

ilovesooty · 13/04/2021 14:18

@MiddleParking

You are not allowed in a lift with others. Do you not know that? There are signs outside and inside the lift.

So get out yourself then. As if your dickhead husband would have told a man to get out a lift Hmm

Why wouldn't he have asked - not told - a man to comply with the lift policy? I'd have no hesitation in doing so in my office building if it were an issue.
lynsey91 · 13/04/2021 15:41

@MiddleParking

You are not allowed in a lift with others. Do you not know that? There are signs outside and inside the lift.

So get out yourself then. As if your dickhead husband would have told a man to get out a lift Hmm

When we got into the lift there was no one waiting. As the door was about to close she entered the lift. The door to the hotel is very close to the TWO lifts so she must have come in once we were in the lift. Why the hell should we then get out? God forbid that she could have pressed the button for the other lift. The hotel is not exactly busy so it's not like she would be waiting ages Or, of course, she could have walked up the stairs. There are only 2 floors to the hotel.

Oh and before you come back with the comment that we could have walked, my DH has a bad knee and I have problems walking.

My husband did NOT tell her to get out, he asked her nicely. Of course he would have said the same to a man.

Are you a complete idiot or just very rude?

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