Why is everyone suddenly using the term ‘gaslighting’ for absolutely everything?

[OolieMacdoolie]

The term ‘gaslighting’ has a very specific meaning - it’s a form of manipulation in which a person causes another to doubt their perceptions, memories and beliefs by using denial, misdirection, contradiction and disinformation.

But I see it all the time on mumsnet to refer to any number of usually much more benign things - someone disagrees with you about something? Gaslighting. Someone points out that you forgot to do something? Gaslighting. Someone had a difference of opinion about a subject of debate? Gaslighting.

Is it just in vogue at the moment? Or do people think it legitimises their position in a dispute if they can characterise a routine disagreement as someone actually trying to psychologically destroy them?

Sorry, another one that gets seems to be misunderstood is 'misogyny'. If a woman/female gets any sort of disrespect from a man/boy on mn he is a misogynistic pig. That isn't necessarily misogyny, it's just blokes being assholes.

For instant, there was a recent thread in which a 13-year-old boy told a 13year old girl to close her legs her fanny stinks. While this is crude and vulgar one poster said it was misogyny because he alluded to her female parts in a derogatory way. Eh, that isn't misogyny.

I've heard many girls/females and even males joke/comment on ''kick him on the balls...he's got a tiny dick'' and nobody would call that misandry. It's just crude/vulgar/offensive but it doesn't mean it's misandry.

Another one I see around mumsnet is calling someone's words or post "disgusting" or "nasty" - usually said in place of "I disagree with your opinion but i'll shame you for that opinion and make such a huge deal of it as if you literally spit on my face".

I think actual nasty or disgusting posts are/should be deleted but very few are. Instead, it's used as a way to shut people up or sway public opinion against them. At the very least, most people won't want to be associated with a post that's been labelled as nasty or disgusting even if they don't think it is.

It's the (currently) more effective "I'm offended".