Happier before or after?

[Putthebiglighton]

Kids, if you have any?

It’s a funny one.
You don’t realise or appreciate how carefree and easy your life is before children until you have children, but once you have children you can’t imagine ever not having them and are happy in a way you never experienced before.

Life is a lot harder with kids

You don’t realise or appreciate how carefree and easy your life is before children until you have children, but once you have children you can’t imagine ever not having them and are happy in a way you never experienced before.

Yeah I agree. Before having kids people tell you how hard it will be, but you don't really listen and still have them anyway. And then you realise they weren't lying and it really is f**ng hard work! Life was 100 x easier before kids. But that does not mean I'm not happy. Imagine I will be happier still when they are a bit older !

Definitely happier after..more tired, messier house and hardly any time to ourselves but utterly and completely happier with them. Hard to imagine what we did with all our spare time and freedom before we had them. Wouldn't change it for the world. It really is the most amazing thing ever

After

After. Happy before but just more content now. First year was hard though as other pps have said.

I also think that as I wanted a child so much, if I hadn't have been able to have one, I obviously wouldn't have been happy/ I would have had to work through that. If that makes sense! The longing would have stayed.

@Frownette

Those who said before, are your children quite young?

14 months. I’m not unhappy now but life was so much easier, more fun and fulfilling before.

I don't think my children have made the massive difference to my happiness that many other people's have. There was a time we thought we couldn't have them, and I think I would have been OK if it never happened. I love them to bits, but both pre and post children have pros and cons.

The little baby bit was awful because I NEED SLEEP, but that's temporary so I don't count it in my analysis.

However, a funny side effect of having children that has been really good for my mental health is the enforced daily routine. I was never that great at being consistent with sleep time, meals, housework, fresh air... Now, if I want to do something every day I just make it a part of the toddler's routine and he reminds me! It's really settled me down to have the daily routine of having small children, as it turns out there's all sorts of stuff I find it easier to do for other people than for myself.

After. I have struggled with depression and anxiety (mainly linked to my cycle) since my teens and having a child hasn’t been a magic bullet to fix that, of course. But my DS is a wee legend, he’s hilarious and fascinating and beautifully squishy.

I’d love it if he learned to sleep through the night before he gets to the age of 4 though...

@Happycat1212

Before 😔

Oh no... why?

Both, before I was happy with DH travelling, sleeping, meals out and enjoying ourselves.

After I love a good cuddle and the little sleep thieves make my heart burst

Before, although I can barely remember it.

Happy before, happy after.
Though I think I would be unhappy if I didn’t have dcs now.

Depends on the year you asked me. But here we are with two teens and a 5 year old and it's lovely. Much better without the rd husband.

Mamajules43

I’m a lone parent, it’s not a Life I would have chose.