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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Snapchat for 7 year old?

110 replies

M24L · 05/04/2021 22:41

My DD 7 had a sleepover with her cousin who is 12 and has Snapchat, my DD asked if she could also have Snapchat I responded with no as 7 is far too young but after DD discussing with her dad (DH) she stated she would add only her cousin and no one else her dad said it would be OK.

Now DD hadn't downloaded Snapchat but has went for a sleepover with said cousin, I said to DD before dropping her off that she could set up Snapchat when back home so that myself or DH could have access to passwords etc and have control of the account, I have an app on my phone that controls everything DD does and it has just notified me that she has downloaded and set up Snapchat with her cousin behind my back.

I have blocked the app on her phone for the time being and I spoke with DD to find out why she went behind my back to do this only to be told that it was her cousin who set it up and her cousin has added other cousins and said cousins friend.

I am absolutely livid with this. AIBU to have blocked the app on her phone? I honestly think 7 is far too young for such an app and the fact now that they have went and added more than first stated just goes to show me that there is no trust that it would remain only her cousin.

DH is sleeping at the moment so I'm now lying here feeling guilty that DD isn't "down with the cool kids" but also angry that I've been disobeyed and I have noone to talk to about it.

YABU - it's only her cousins she's added and you can get all details etc to keep and eye on it when she's home.

YANBU - She's 7 and far too young for Snapchat, they shouldn't have done it behind your back.

OP posts:

worried3012 · 06/04/2021 10:18

[quote M24L]@worried3012 the app is called family link on Samsung (not sure if you can download it on iphone)[/quote]
Thank you, I'll check it out

HoldontoOneMoreDay · 06/04/2021 10:30

More generally, as the parent of a DC15, you will have a far, far easier life over the next 8 years or so if you just stick to age limits. We did this religiously from when DS was very small so when it came to asking for things like insta when he was 10 all we had to say was 'oh sorry, the age limit is 13'. You just make it part of your parenting 'thing' and it takes away so many arguments. Although you have to be 100% consistent with it, even with things like 12 rated films you think they'd be fine with age 11.

I'm not saying DS never pushed back on the age rules but he understood them and knew he'd have no chance of changing our minds on them, so the level of push back was totally manageable.

TheNugLife · 06/04/2021 10:32

to be honest you've set yourself up for failure by allowing a 7 year old a ruddy smart phone. its also shocking that your DH said yes before even researching it first.

Not sure why posters have an issue with the age gap however for the sleepover, must be the ott parent parade out in force but many cousins and other relatives have sleepovers and most aren't born in the same year.

littlebillie · 06/04/2021 10:38

7 year olds don't need a phone

RedGoldAndGreene · 06/04/2021 11:47

Google "How to hack Family Link" and there's video tutorials for getting round screen time limits etc You are kidding yourself if you place faith in software like this- a 12yo will know how to get round it and t

RedGoldAndGreene · 06/04/2021 11:48

And tell your dd how to do it

Why is your 7yo having sleepovers with a 12yo? This was inevitable tbh and I wouldn't be surprised if your dd was exposed to other grown up talk via her cousin

LooseThreads · 06/04/2021 11:58

One of the dc in my year two class brought her phone into school and started taking photos at lunchtime. The lunchtime supervisor saw it happening but assumed it was a toy phone. Obviously as they are small children.

It's caused a safeguarding nightmare as the photos went on the cloud and the head had to contact every parent and CPOM every child and explain to them what happened as now those photos are just out there. It's caused a proper hoo-haa in the relationships between the parents.

bubblebath62636 · 06/04/2021 12:06

Take the phone away op.

She doesn't need to feel 'cool' or 'grown up', she's a little girl for gods sake.

RedGoldAndGreene · 07/04/2021 13:22

"Cool" 7yo are not on Snapchat. If they are tilts because their parents are negligent.
There's a massive difference between a 7yo and 12yo and you'll realise this when your dd goes from y6 to y7.
If she likes the Snapchat photo filters then there's lots of apps that you can download on your phone so she can have a play. 7yo don't need smartphones

dobidobidooo · 07/04/2021 13:25

She shouldn't have a phone full stop...there is no need. Also I would be reluctant to let her stay over with 12 yr old cousin in future. Why are they being unsupervised? The difference betwee a 12 yr old and a 6 yr old is waaay too much @M24L

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