School calling children piglets?

[GoToSleepBabyPlease]

Came across this on another thread but felt discussing it there would constitute a derail, so bringing it up here.

On a school website (link below):

'To make table manners fun at Hanford we have devised the ‘Manners Table’, a ranking system of eleven different levels with ‘Piglet’ at the bottom and ‘Royal Guest’ at the top. Each level has a different name to describe the behaviour, for example, a messy eater will be a ‘Panda’ or even ‘Cave Lady’ whereas those girls who have mastered dining rather than merely eating will be a ‘Favourite Auntie’ or ‘Best Granny’. When new girls join they start somewhere in the middle with the aim of working their way up as quickly as possible. If they should become a ‘Royal Guest’ they are allowed to bring their own jam to breakfast. Every Friday after lunch, Miss Morrey reads out the week’s manners rankings. If a girl is moved up then they are given a sweet while others may be warned or some even moved down.

1. Royal Guest (allowed to bring their own jam or other spread and can also move people up and down)
2. Best Granny (allowed to move people up and down in manners)
3. Favourite Aunty
4. Primrose
5. Panda
6. Cat (can go to Tuck Shop on Sunday)
7. Squirrel
8. Hyena
9. Boa Constrictor
10. Cave Lady

10. Piglet'

AIBU to think that referring to children as piglets doesn't exactly model good manners?

hanfordschool.co.uk/wellbeing/manners/

[quote Puffykins]@gotosleepbabyplease I'd love to send DD there, and she really wants to go. I'm not sending her to boarding school at 7 (she's already 8 for a start) which is the age I was, but I would totally send her at 9/ 10. I'm trying to juggle some things to work out if we can afford the fees. For what it's worth, I would not be doing this for any other school - I realise that Hanford might seem extraordinary judging by the website, but I had the most magical time - partly for all the reasons that everyone else thinks extraordinary! - and it is for that reason that I would love DD to go.[/quote]
Please please don't subject your child to such abuse. Please don't put her through it.

I don't understand why some people have kids if they just ship them off to boarding schools

Abuse @MNWorldisCrazy?

I assume @Puffykins didn't feel her parents were being abusive sending her there.

Is Nutella a drug?

Having watched my dc with the the stuff I'm pretty sure it is.

I think it all looks utterly glorious! Lucky girls who attend that school. 🙂

@MNWorldisCrazy which bit is abusive? Ranking the kids on their manners or sending kids to boarding school?

33MNWorldisCrazy

But there are posters on the thread who really enjoyed being there. Surely they would be in a position to describe it as abuse if this was their experience, while you have never set foot in the place?

Or have you?

Being rewarded with Nutella for behaving terribly nicely,could,in fact ,not be a good thing.Give it 10 minutes in a state school.

I’d rather sit across from a DC who chewed without displaying it than one who sprayed every morsel over the table.

Manners are about respect and kindness, not social class. Go Hanford.

I’m more surprised that anything with nuts in gets past the gates of any school. Nutella and that cormorant is Out. Of. bounds.

I have nooo idea what school or what this referring to lol
Is it not something out of an Enid Blyton book?! Malory Towers ot St Clares?!
Sounds like it

allowing the higher levels to demote the lower would give plenty of opportunity for bullying
fuck that if so (probably got demoted to piggy level for saying fuck lol, but fuck i don't care)

I'm not typically a fan of boarding schools but have to admit @Puffykins there's something enchanting about the school. I can see why you have fond memories and hope your dd can go. Not sure I'd entertain termly boarding but could see 1-2 nights a week. Looks so lovely!

@Puffykins

Also, regarding the inclusivity for children who are disabled; the school is in a listed Tudor manor house and the classrooms are in the old coach houses and girls have to climb in and out through the windows. However I have no doubt that if someone really wanted to go to the school who couldn't manage that, the school would do all they could to facilitate that.

Ok. I want to go now!!!!

How do the Teachers get into the classrooms?

I'd rather be a piglet than a royal Guest!

I fear I would be FAR too disruptive for this school.

CBA to RTFT but
a) how shit must Hanford's house jam be for one's own jam to be sufficient inducement to move up the ladder?
b) can you fake it till you make it to best granny then promote everyone else to Royal Guest even if they are eating with their face straight in the bowl- after all, the epitome of good manners is making others feel at ease.
c) Royal Guest? Which kind of royal? What's the correct etiquette when consuming one's nosh in Woking's finest pizza establishment anyway...and would you want your teenage daughter to be a guest??

@sashh

Another 50+ person here who wants to go to the school, a school with no uniform but dogs and ponies, and options to bring your own pony!

Over the summer they should run a summer school for oldies to spend the day.

Count me in for a 'Residential'

I'll bring the gin!

I certainly wouldn't agree with it if it was a state school where parents often don't get their first choice allocation , but a private school ? Parents actively chose to send their children there and pay for the privilege . Therefore I would guess it would appeal to those people who find this kind of thing important .

Agree with the point of offence to Muslim / Jewish families, and whilst it would be a choice to send their DC there do see that it could be indirectly discriminatory. Also in respect of additional needs .

I certainly wouldn't want to send any child of mine to a school with such strange priorities .

But @Puffykins do they let the girls chalk on the floor? @Butwasitherdriveway is looking for a new school

@SleepingStandingUp

Did you HAVE to put out the siren call ???

@Puffykins. You are incredibly patient & polite!! Not sure if that's your nature, your parents or your schooling, but well done!

I'm glad you enjoyed your time there and it would be lovely if your DD goes.

Thank you for sharing your LIVED experience with us! You make it sound really lovely (if a tad bonkers).

I'm in for the summer school, blankets & cats on the bed! And obviously riding before breakfast - but they may want to get a couple of Clydesdales in!!

I think it all sounds great fun, and yes, it gives the girls something to AIM for!! At my prep school, we had a deportment chart, where every term each girl was either a rabbit, piglet, lamb, etc. and the little stickers were moved every week according to how your deportment improved/got worse! Like a PP, at my public school we had a 'top table' in the dining room for lunch, and everyone took turns to sit with the headmistress and other senior staff - the aim was to get you to learn how to make conversation over a meal with anybody you were seated with. All these things are designed to give children social skills - what's wrong with that?

On the other thread I couldn’t imagine sending an 8 year old away to school - maybe 11? DD can stay at home and I’ll go instead!

As for table manners they are really important - it’s horrible to sit opposite someone who talks with their mouth full etc. Schools should model and expect good table manners.

As for the Oxford rowers I knew several. Their table manners could be horrible especially with creme caramel but they also knew how to eat properly too. It’s not either or.

Shudder.

I think table manners are really important. The number of children we have had over for dinner where 6/7/8 year olds need a spoon or their food cut up and older children being unable to use cutlery properly. I feel desperately sorry for them, it must be so awkward.

I do think it is a good thing if schools are able to reward good table manners in some way. However, most schools are busy just to teach children basic literacy and numeracy. Isn’t it a problem that many children leave primary school unable to read properly? Anything the schools can do is great I think , I would be fully supportive. However, this isn’t education, it is parenting. As such the school should only be about positive reinforcement, the fundamentals and main part of this should come from home.

It sounds lovely. I wish I lived closer to it.

Hmmm it sounds terribly classist so great of you aspire to be thought posh.

In fairness, at my children's state primary, they were all grades of chickens with free range being the goal

lovely, a tad bonkers and for rich people only.

I think its sad . All children should have the best education.

Look at kids football teams, the scrawny, undernourished ones, much shorter than the opposing team from the leafy suburbs.

I don't think Hanford qualifies either as classist, or for rich people only. I was there because my father was military, and so qualified for the boarding school allowance (we moved four times in the five years I was there, and were living in Germany when I first went.) Often children are at boarding school because their parents' jobs/ lives make a day school untenable. And then it is the job of the boarding school to be the best in loco parentis that it can be, hence the importance of manners being part of it.