Please help, school exclusion.

[Blossomplease6]

I’m aware this is the wrong board but I need advice quickly and the sen boards are slow and quieter.
My son, 8, is I think on the verge of being expelled from school. I’m so scared, he would be devastated. I’m terrified of him having to go to a bee school who don’t understand him and he would be heartbroken and scared.
He has no diagnosis, we’re waiting for camhs at the moment. He’s having meltdowns at school, which can be quite violent and are aimed at teachers. Never students. We can’t work out why, there are triggers but normally small things that shouldn’t cause such a breakdown.
Where do I stand legally? I have a meeting coming up and I just think they’re going to say they can’t cope with him anymore. He wasn’t like this before. There’s always been issues, and meltdowns at school but he was never violent until his first stint in keyworker school last year. That then stopped when he returned to normal school in September. But has restarted again after Xmas and the latest lockdown.

How many exclusions has he had?

Are school using the graduated approach?

Have school apllied for an ehcp?

Go through the schools, behaviour, SEND and exclusion policy and highlight any areas where you feel school haven't followed their own policies.

Go to the meeting armed with knowledge it will empower you to fight for the right support. (We shouldn't have to do this but it is necessary a lot of the time.)
Can anyone support you such as Sendias or a local charity?

Ask school to apply for an ehcp if they haven't already. If they refuse make a parental application.

Permanent exclusion really should be a last resort after school have tried everything. It is also expensive and time consuming for the school.

School may say they are not able to support your son. If this happens this would be concrete evidence for and ehcp and specialist placement so would not necessarily be a bad thing. They would also need to evidence everything they have tried first, not just say they cannot manage him at the first hurdle.

Does he have an EHCP?

If he is excluded permanently, contact the School Exclusion Project or Communities Empowerment Network.
schoolexclusionproject.com/
cenlive.org/representation

You really need to get as much professional support as possible. Some great advice above. Find your local SENDIASS service - Special Educational Needs and Disability Information Advice and Support Services and seek urgent help.

I’ll go through and try and answer as much as I can...
He hits, kicks, throws things ect. Mainly once senior teachers come to intervene, this escalates it.

I’m not sure of the triggers or if the school are. It varies so much. Some examples, wanting to do one thing when it’s time for something else, not being cognitively/physically able to complete a task as well as he thinks he should, wanting to wander off or do something different to others. I don’t think he has a specific safe space but was spending a lot of time outside the class room so last week the moved him in to the sen class where it’s a much slower pace. He said he prefers it as it’s not as noisy and less people. But he still seems to be struggling. Although there’s been 3 classes in a month so I’m not surprised. Key worker, normal, now SEN.

I do want him to stay in current school. Will make a list of these ideas and bring them up. Visual aids os worth a try. I’m also just going to apply for an ehcp myself a bit. SenCo has been reluctant to do it even though I’ve been asking for well over a year. He wanted to wait for a diagnosis even though the paediatrician suggested he apply for one in the mean time.

I’ve never seen a behaviour plan or iep but they are now saying they cannot meet his needs despite the highest level of support they can offer. I believe a 1:1 would have helped a lot, and could of kept him in class and allowed him time to settle back in before having to give up and move him.

He struggles with a lot of boundaries but not all of them, and not all the time. It’s really hard to work out what’s going on. Especially as he won’t talk about it.

I have a virtual session booked with the sendiass team next week actually and will ask about ehcp.

He has been excluded once for 2 days since going back.

I do not want him to have to move schools. He’s academically able, likes school and his friends. I feel like this has all been made worse by lockdown and he needs proper support and time for it to work.

I will look at the policies of the school tonight.

I’m heartbroken for him.

Does his teacher feel safe if he is regularly assaulting them?

It does sound like they have tried to implement some strategies for him in school, OP, but I’m shocked that he hasn’t already got a behaviour plan. It’s not just to give him rules and boundaries, but also to give him targets so that when he does manage to, for example, spend the first five minutes on task, he can have a small and fairly instant reward.

I can completely understand why the teaching staff would find it hard to teach a child like your son. But all behaviour is communication. He’s trying to tell you how distressed he is and the school, and you, need to work out why that is and what can be done to avoid it. If his challenging behaviour is triggered by adults in school, he may need play therapy to explore why that is.

You do have to clock up quite a few fixed-term exclusions before you reach the ultimate sanction of a permanent exclusion. Every one of those exclusions needs to have been documented, with the child having a re-integration meeting on his return to school. You should have letters informing you of every exclusion, and I strongly recommend you start making a file for everything, if you haven’t already done so.

In my LA the Inclusion Service (formerly Education Welfare) gets involved in every case where a child is at risk of permanent exclusion. They want to avoid it too - if no local school place can be found, the LA may have to pay for travel to the nearest one. Anything that costs money will be something the LA wants to avoid at all costs.

@Becles he has never been physical towards any of his class teachers. Always the SLT when they come to intervene, generally because they touch him first, eg removing him from the situation.

He has been in key worker school since January which he enjoyed, went back to normal school last
Month for a few weeks and then last week got moved
Away from his class and peers to a smaller sen group. Things have definitely got worse since school returned fully last
Month.

@ThatsShitTryHarder he has only had one exclusion. Tbf to the school they
Could technically exclude him every
Time he’s physical but he’s never been ‘punished’ for it as they do understand it’s not his fault.
I don’t have any paperwork from school, nothing. Have never seen a plan or a risk assessment although I’m sure they have a pretty big file! I think they have to write statements every time there’s one of these incidents.

Always the SLT when they come to intervene, generally because they touch him first, eg removing him from the situation.

You might want to ask if the SLT have had Positive Touch training, which enables them to take control of the physical side of a situation without the child feeling restrained or trapped. We used it in one of the schools I worked in, with a child who sounds just like your son, only older, and it enabled us to “hang onto” him while we waited for a space at a specialist school to become available.

I can’t believe the SLT are continuing with a strategy that they know makes the situation worse.

They need to find a way to get him out of the classroom earlier and without having to touch him then. It may be wrong but when your already in a heightened sense of anxiety then someone touching you to try to remove you will send you into fight or flight mode.

Have thought children like this.
Visual timetable is essential so he knows exactly what's happening and when..Also getting ahead of the meltdown rather than dealing with it when it happens. So anticipating the things he finds difficult and preparing him for them. Also as already said a behaviour plan where he gets rewarded for doing the right activity. Reward could be a quiet time in his favourite spot or some time with a Special Needs Teacher doing an activity he enjoys. It is difficult for the teacher dealing with this alone

What do you think he might be diagnosed with? I ask this as the strategies are so different for different diagnoses. Have you considered ASD with PDA? It could explain the meltdowns. Once we implemented the PDA strategies (before diagnosis, in part from desperation) we and the school there was a dramatic change for the better which has continued. Take a look at the resources at:

www.pdasociety.org.uk/

There is also a forum there where you will find many parents who have had a similar experience with exclusion etc. (very, very common with PDA, perhaps up to 70% of boys with this diagnosis).

[quote Blossomplease6]@ThatsShitTryHarder he has only had one exclusion. Tbf to the school they
Could technically exclude him every
Time he’s physical but he’s never been ‘punished’ for it as they do understand it’s not his fault.
I don’t have any paperwork from school, nothing. Have never seen a plan or a risk assessment although I’m sure they have a pretty big file! I think they have to write statements every time there’s one of these incidents.[/quote]
It sounds like they’re just containing him until they can exclude him, tbh.

You should have had a letter informing you of the exclusion because a copy of that letter should also go to the LA. The letter also informs you of your responsibilities as a parent during the exclusion.

I would ask for your copy of the letter as a bare minimum and look for the school’s inclusion policy when you do your reading tonight.

On the plus side, it would be highly unlikely that he would be permanently excluded after one fixed termed exclusion, and certainly with no behaviour plan, targets, reviews, etc on his file they would be told they haven’t got enough evidence to warrant a permanent exclusion.

My 8 year old was similar in mainstream, he's now in an independent special school, though I appreciate that's not your aim here. He is autistic, ADHD and has significant sensory difficulties.

Did the school give formal exclusion letter and have reintegration meeting?

You can do a Subject Access Request to school to get information they hold, which should include all the incidents. This can cause friction with school but for us it proved necessary to get the supporting evidence.
My son's old school basically just wanted us to move him elsewhere ourselves and we're not supportive of the EHCP.

We got there but it was a hard slog.

Can you afford any independent assessments? I think OT including Sensory is a really good one, especially if they can visit to school as well.

Good luck

Unfortunately without a diagnosis the school are unable to help him. They can't set up a proper care routine or plan without knowing what he really needs.

That being said, if they do keep him they can try to give him breaks throughout the day (do they have a pastoral leader? They would be able to take him out of class a few times a day to go to a neutral place and chat/rest).

Unfortunately if he is causing harm or disrupting class too much without a diagnosis they can exclude him. Are you able to home educate him for a while until his diagnosis?

I'm so sorry you're going through this, it's such a shame that children like yours aren't able to access education with proper support. I hope he gets help soon x

A diagnosis can be helpful if the LA has any specific services e.g. ASD outreach but otherwise it is about needs not diagnosis. Even with an EHCP the school are usually expected to fund some provision themselves. This was why my son's school did not want him to have an EHCP as it was detrimental to their budget

Have you got strategies that work at home that can be translated to school. Mine are both dyslexic so have had difficulty with transitions, timing and tasks being overwhelming. Things that helped included sand timers (makes time passing tangible), 5 min warnings of change, fiddle toys, breaking tasks down into smaller chunks and providing starters to help to get into a task eg an opening sentence for a piece of writing.
Keep pushing for a proper plan from the school.

Unfortunately without a diagnosis the school are unable to help him. They can't set up a proper care routine or plan without knowing what he really needs.

That may be true in your LA, but in mine there are many strategies a school can implement to support children without a diagnosis. And much of out of risk and error - if one thing doesn’t work, another strategy will be tried.

In fact, having evidence of what the school has already put in place, and the degree to which it’s been successful, forms the basis of most referrals for a diagnosis in my LA.

• trial and error

You’re getting lots of brilliant advice here, a number of posters are names I know have been in your situation as have we

My only input is to say please please think, is this school really the best place for your ds

He sounds totally overwhelmed, although you might not want to hear this I really think you need to think about possible alternatives for his education

In the right setting kids like ours really do thrive, I just get the feeling that this isn’t that setting

Op

There’s violence
Teachers in mainstream school really should not have to face this
And not should the other children have to witness this
Nor should their teaching time be spent on dealing with this violence

I feel for you. But your son should not be at mainstream school.

I think an ehcp is going to be essential to provide him with the support he needs to stay in school. That is going to be the only way to fund 1:1 support. It helps to have a diagnosis but it's not essential. There is clear evidence your son is not managing in school (hence the exclusions) so he should have an assessment. Also are there other ways the school can manage his behaviour. You say senior teachers intervening and touching him are causing issues. Are there other ways they could manage the situation? Talk to the senco about alternatives. My son was terrified of the head and her office, so their involvement always made the situation more volatile.

What is it that has caused other adults to come in and intervene? I assume they are only touching him to remove him from endangering others. It is very frightening for adults let alone children when a child is out of control. Good luck op and ds.