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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is there a second thread for the horse/obsessive ex owner?

278 replies

ExtraordinaryQuince · 24/03/2021 13:51

Just that really.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
9
DinoHat · 25/03/2021 11:03

@PleaseReferToMeAsBritneySpears

I want one and I'm not ashamed to say it.
Me too.
Okki · 25/03/2021 11:08

@Maverickess I was reading your post thinking how the love for your disgracefully ageing pair comes through. Got a huge grin now.

SchadenfreudePersonified · 25/03/2021 11:15

@Maverickess

To whoever said they'd like an old retired horse - don't do it, just don't.

My horse retired early (15) due to issues that affect him ridden, and will probably end his days sooner, but he's pain free at the moment when not ridden, he lives with a 30 year old horse that is also retired.

I've worked with breeding stallions, youngsters, ex racers, fit event horses, started and trained youngsters, a lot of different breeds that are known for being highly strung, and yet never have I had so many issues with horses behaving like arseholes that the two twat bags described above.

They jump out if they fancy a new field, and if they can't jump it, they find a weak spot, in fact any spot they like and push it down, even with electric fence. They take turns in getting shocked.

They had a field shelter built with great care for their comfort and needs, which they have destroyed scratching their arses on.
They tag team you when poo picking, and whilst one distracts, the other will push the barrow over, then both run away in mock terror of the monster.
They stand at the field gate and whinny pitifully at the other liveries, delivery men, the postman and in fact anyone for food, when they have full haynets in the shelter and 2 hard feeds a day and have come out of winter looking better than they went in. They want carrots and apparently I don't supply enough.
They like to rip their own and each others rugs with expensive regularity, by hedge diving and mutual grooming - the same hedges which an hour later will be terrifying and impossible to walk past sensibly, but rather need lots of flying around snorting with tails over their backs.

Despite the fact both were trained, and stood for many years being shod quietly, treated by vets and led in headcollars, they now think the farrier is fair game to be dragged around, the vet stood on multiple times, and their headcollars would have more effect on a ten tonne truck than they do on them some days.
Horses grow old disgracefully! And I love every minute of it ❤
I am off to finish the other thread now 😊

Brilliant!

Just brilliant!

Grin
Daytimetellysucks · 25/03/2021 11:30

Horses grow old disgracefully! And I love every minute of it ❤

Hear hear!

Other than general knobhead behaviour and her quite scary sleeping habits. bearing in mind she has chronic arthritis and is in her late 20s, she’s

Broken in to the feed room overnight, then couldn’t get out so we had to take a stud wall down. Twice!!

Jumps! out of her field at least once a week to go and smooch with the gelding next door.

Takes her own and others rugs off, somehow without undoing any of the buckles, and grinds them into the mud

Pushes over fences, electric or otherwise - electric fences are a challenge to overcome

Tried to jump over her stable door to get to the newly delivered bale of hay just outside her door - but got stuck half way, meaning we had to take the front of her stable down so we could get the door off - while she stood there eating - just as we were nearly there, she jumped the rest of the way over and fucked off across the yard.

Tips the wheel barrow over every time you poo pick her field - it has to be a 2 man job so someone can hold the barrow

Regular kite impressions when taking to and from the field.

Wallows in mud like a hippo - their field gateway gets very muddy in winter. I chucked her out naked the other day and then spent 3 hours scraping thick mud off the fucker

She’s a walking vet bill, treads on my toes for fun and is a complete dustbin but I do love the bones of her. I threaten her weekly with the glue factory but she laughs in my face, and then shits in her water trough

PleaseReferToMeAsBritneySpears · 25/03/2021 11:40

Loving these horse stories! Who knew old and/or retired horses were so naughty?!

A couple of you have mentioned picking up poo when out in the field. Does everybody do that? Doesn't the poo just decompose into the grass?

BlueEyesWhiteDragon · 25/03/2021 11:44

@Maverickess Absolutely they do. My old girl (who is sadly no longer with us) was a quirky girl when she was in work but honestly nothing compared to the insanity she displayed when ridden.

Some of the many adventures she had were ...

Escaped out of her field (5ft fencing she was 13.1 so no idea how) and decided to take herself off for a hack through the forest. Whilst frantically and with increasing panic I am searching for her and calling in help for a search party, ringing all local land owners etc I get a call from dad to say shes turned back up at the yard and wants to be let in .

Broke into the feed room and ate half a bag of dried speedibeet. Spent the entire night sitting up to make sure she wasn't ill and she was as right as rain.

Regularly trashed electric fencing or if she had had enough chased one of the others through the electric fencing so she could get to the grass the other side.

She was part Welsh and regularly turned into a dragon as the most ridiculous of things - her headcollar, water buckets and once memorably a hay net which despite having hung in the same location for approximately 5 years she proceeded to attack with a ferocity that would have had any real predator running for safety!!!

The only good thing I will say is she never ever knocked over the poo barrow ... shed jump it instead often whilst you were pushing it along.

She was absolutely a mare you "asked" to do things not told and some days she absolutely said no.

I loved every second of my time spent with her and the day she finally told me she'd had enough and I had to let her go has the power to break my heart even now. I miss the stubborn old brat.

BlueEyesWhiteDragon · 25/03/2021 11:50

When retired even!

HeronLanyon · 25/03/2021 11:51

Please please look away if you are young/impressionable/delicate/having snack or early lunch.

I have not been the same person since a horsey friend explained what she would be doing with the ‘sheath brush’ in bucket of water later on. This after naughty boy had been privately pleasuring himself with a traffic cone. Mythe horsey equivalent of the infamous mn ‘penis beaker’ I think.

I am so sorry and have resisted mentioning. But feel I must. Must also say the traffic cone incident (not a one off) was hilarious to see.
GrinShockConfusedGrin

Daytimetellysucks · 25/03/2021 11:56

Yes! Spooking at random shit that they’ve happily lived alongside for years, but only sometimes Confused

A rug rack on the wall in her stable, a barrel of daffodils (tbh, mostly weeds that she always tries to eat), our yard owner’s husband when he isn’t wearing a hat, her new haynets (although, I’ve replaced her old ones with trickle feeders so I suspect that may be why), a rug that has lived thrown over the wall between her and her neighbour since last summer, the wheelbarrow when it’s not in her field, her own hair that is currently coming off in sheets, her own wee if she’s standing on a hill and it trickles down between her front feet.

I took her for a mooch down the lane yesterday and there are some lambs in a field - the field that backs on to her field! - my life flashed before my eyes

BendyLikeBeckham · 25/03/2021 11:59

thanks for starting another horsey thread, OP. I was also wondering if @BlueEyesWhiteDragon had done so. I really enjoyed the last one for the horsey stories. Now I understand about Shitlands!

I would love to have a horse but can't commit the time or money. So I'll content myself reading about others who do.

DiseasesOfTheSheep · 25/03/2021 13:04

I used to bring my horses home to clip them in my back garden when I was on a yard with no electric on site. I'd leave them in there to graze for a couple of hours when they were done. They saved me mowing the lawn that week (several weeks if I did them one at a time, one per weekend!) and would sometimes stick their heads in at the patio door to say hi. I loved it - but I'm not a gardener and I do think any grass without horses on it is completely wasted!

DinoHat · 25/03/2021 13:21

@PleaseReferToMeAsBritneySpears

Loving these horse stories! Who knew old and/or retired horses were so naughty?!

A couple of you have mentioned picking up poo when out in the field. Does everybody do that? Doesn't the poo just decompose into the grass?

Nope you have to clean it up or have your fields harrowed. It might decompose eventually but not fast enough for how often they shit. Leaving poo can also create a worm problem.
DinoHat · 25/03/2021 13:24

Broke into the feed room and ate half a bag of dried speedibeet. Spent the entire night sitting up to make sure she wasn't ill and she was as right as rain.

This reminds me of when I was younger and my dad used to sort my mare on a Friday evening cause i had a PT job. He wasn’t “horsey” but confident and my little mare adored him.

Turned out he paid no attention to what she ate whatsoever and just gave her a scoop of everything. That included dried speedibeat and grass nuts (they were simple systems Lucie nuts if anyone remembers them - no idea if they’re still going). I found out by chance. Mare had always been fine. I was so horrified when I found out.

PleaseReferToMeAsBritneySpears · 25/03/2021 13:46

Thanks DinoHat

ExtraordinaryQuince · 25/03/2021 13:57

@DinoHat What sort of a worm problem? Do people not worm horses these days?

Also, a general question - has horse behaviour management changed in the same way as dog management? My horsey/country relatives were all about showing a dog who was boss (some of them still are, actually Hmm) and kicking a horse on/using a stick if necessary.

Nowadays positive reinforcement is recommended by newer dog trainers and from one horse guy I follow on Facebook, am I right in thinking that that is the case with horses too?

OP posts:
ExtraordinaryQuince · 25/03/2021 13:58

Am I the only one to have googled traffic cones? Shock Envy - not envy

OP posts:
DinoHat · 25/03/2021 14:14

@ExtraordinaryQuince I’m not a worm expert but I understand that the worms lay eggs in the poo/or horses with a worm burden poo and horses graze around them and then ingest the worms/eggs. You obviously should worm your horses but I’ve known many livery yards where this isn’t policed so your worming routine is only as effective as the person who takes the least care. I’ve always done counts and have noticed the only time they’ve had a worm burden is when they were turned out with others who I knew didn’t worm...

SchadenfreudePersonified · 25/03/2021 14:29

Broken in to the feed room overnight, then couldn’t get out so we had to take a stud wall down. Twice!!

Is that because by the time you find her in there she is so full of any nuts and bran and oats and other delights, she is too fat to fit through the door any more, having just vacuumed up as much as she could as quickly as she could?

BlueEyesWhiteDragon · 25/03/2021 14:35

Personally I do worm counts and worm as and when they need them rather than worming to a strict schedule. My actually rarely need worming but I think that's because they a fixed herd and so there isn't other horses who may or may not be wormed sharing their space.

With regards to poo picking. Not everyone does it. Its become standard practice (or should be) now because horses are often kept in smaller areas which don't allow for the rotation of grazing. As the horses have less space they end up grazing near their droppings and so ingest the worm eggs which have been shed with the droppings and / or laid in them. We used to be in the enviable position of 6 horses on 20 acres so we rotated and rested paddocks harrowing (spreading the poo out) rather than picking it up. I have to pick it up on the track (boooo) but weirdly they don't tend to poo anywhere need any of their food stations.

Daytimetellysucks · 25/03/2021 14:40

@ExtraordinaryQuince mine have regular worm counts and have a de-wormer when necessary, specific to time of year. Over-worming can also be a problem.

Not everyone does, and the livery I share a field with can be a bit lax so I’d rather poo pick regularly

Plus, they shit a lot - it kills the grass unless it’s harrowed.

As for management - depends on the horse. DD’s pony is a bit of a worrier and thrives on being shown that I/DD is the boss.

Sometimes kicking her on (although I don’t mean actually kicking her) followed by lots of praise if she’s twatting about when something is spooking her is the best thing to do - it shows her that there’s actually nothing to be scared of.

It kind of shows her that it’s ok to trust us, even though the carrier bag/slightly different coloured grass/puddle looks terrifying, it really isn’t. Every time we show her a positive outcome, it builds her confidence and trust - if that makes sense, I dunno, might be a load of old waffle.

We have to be firm with her, and she has to trust us, otherwise she has to make her own decisions and they’re not always sensible.

We don’t use a stick on her, she was badly abused as a youngster and she’s absolutely terrified of them.

My OAP needs to be reminded of her boundaries and what behaviour is expected of her, so again, firm but lots of praise when she gets it right.

Daytimetellysucks · 25/03/2021 14:50

@SchadenfreudePersonified

Broken in to the feed room overnight, then couldn’t get out so we had to take a stud wall down. Twice!!

Is that because by the time you find her in there she is so full of any nuts and bran and oats and other delights, she is too fat to fit through the door any more, having just vacuumed up as much as she could as quickly as she could?

It was too narrow to turn her round and she wouldn’t back up.

To be fair, she’s not the only one who has done it. The yard owner has put a door in the other end as well now

BlueEyesWhiteDragon · 25/03/2021 14:57

I agree a thunk a firm but fair is the preferred method these days although the horses character is very important too.

Mine for example. T. I can't think of many occasions where he's been difficult but its resolved by either a walk on command, or a sit deep in the saddle and firm leg pressure. You almost hear him sigh in resignation and then off he goes.

Dick and Ed (Shitlands). Obviously this feral pair aren't ridden so its all groundwork with them (although I'm long reining them with a view to breaking them to harness). When out with these the best solution with these is to be really clear about where the boundary is. For example leading them out, if they get their shoulders in front of you they are going to attempt to tank off 99% of the time so if they try they get a little tap with the end of the lead rope or reins on their shoulder to say Oi!

Cowbag (my mare). Depends on her mood but overall she needs to know you can trust her. That was gained by lots of groundwork. If left to her own devices she makes bad decisions so you have to push her past her insecurities to see shes ok else she's on edge all the time. This does involve kicking her on or on very rare occasions a tap of the whip to her shoulder because in her moments she almost forgets you there. She is very good at responding to the voice if you can get her in the moments before she's a prat though!

countrygirl99 · 25/03/2021 15:06

Talking of naughty horses I was out hacking with a friend, both on coloured cobs. A humungous tractor towing an equally humungous load of hay was coming along the narrow road towards us. He kindly stopped and turned off his engine until we had passed. Both horses grabbed a mouthful of hay without changing pace.

Maverickess · 25/03/2021 15:13

[quote ExtraordinaryQuince]@DinoHat What sort of a worm problem? Do people not worm horses these days?

Also, a general question - has horse behaviour management changed in the same way as dog management? My horsey/country relatives were all about showing a dog who was boss (some of them still are, actually Hmm) and kicking a horse on/using a stick if necessary.

Nowadays positive reinforcement is recommended by newer dog trainers and from one horse guy I follow on Facebook, am I right in thinking that that is the case with horses too?[/quote]
IME, worming has moved from worming 4 times a year, using alternating wormers for different worms and to prevent resistance building up, to doing a worm count and worming on the results of that if at all.
Last worm count for ours was recommended that they didn't need treatment, but as pp says, I have had positive counts back and the vet has indicated which wormer to use, because other people didn't worm, or horses came that hadn't been wormed and increased the count among the herd.

As for changes in management, in the nearly 40 years I've been around horses, so much has changed. Some of it very, very positive. We weren't so concerned with things like saddle fitting, or routine dentistry 'back in the day', that was for competition horses.
Feeding was a completely different thing too, I remember learning the golden rules of feeding, there were about 6 and they were just common sense really! Feed supplements weren't a thing either unless your vet told you to, there weren't really mixes but rather straights that you mixed together yourself, in the quantities you needed depending on what your horses needs were, now you can get an array of feed that is pre mixed for just about any requirement.
Rugs came in 3 types, a 'New Zealand' which was for the field, weighed around 3 tonnes, was basically a wax jacket for horses, a jute rug which was for indoors, and if your horse needed extra warmth, your parents old duvets/blankets folded in a certain way underneath either of the above. The different types of rug available now is mind boggling!

Both of the above have made positive changes to horse welfare, but also negative ones, the vets near us are usually warning about equine obesity, and the dangers of over rugging horses, the two are very closely linked because of how a horses system works, and I can't tell you the amount of horses I've seen stuffed full of the wrong food, not turned out enough and display unwanted behaviour which the owner then spends a fortune on supplements and 'specialist' training to combat, when cutting out feed and giving turn out, herd company, building a bond and consistent work would have changed things a lot faster and with spending less money!
When it comes to handling and riding, there's so many different styles, and I think the really good thing about that is all horses are individuals and will respond differently.
'Old' ways could be cruel in some ways, and many people now prefer the words starting and training to breaking in, and youngsters are often left longer, have more time spent on them and the methods are gentler when starting them.
However there's the other end of the scale where people don't instill respect in their horses or insist on manners, and that can be dangerous. Horses need to trust you, because there will always be something they fear more than you, and repeatedly scaring or hurting a horse won't achieve that. In order to be safe, they need a leader, and they're not daft, they know we're not horses, but they do need boundaries, it's more or less about making the horse see that what you're asking isn't dangerous to him, getting him to trust you enough so he'll try, and taking the pressure off once you've achieved something. Sometimes you have to be firm, especially with adolescent horses that are naturally testing boundaries, things like biting, barging and not walking properly in a headcollar can be really dangerous if not dealt with.

Whips and spurs should be used as an extension of our bodies and not as punishments. Kicking pretty much teaches a horse to ignore you eventually, or gets you into trouble on a sensitive horse. My horse was a lazy git, but if I'd ever kicked him in the ribs, he'd have launched me into outer space.
My whip was an extension of my arm, to touch places on him I couldn't reach to encourage him to go forward, or to refine an instruction. My leg pressed into his side was the spoken instruction, a tickle or tap with the whip, raising my voice. On the lunge the lunge whip (like a circus ring master's whip) is an extension of my arm, you can tickle around hocks to get attention back to you, or flick the tail, but should never hit a horse with one, if you know how, cracking them against themselves is also a way of getting the horses attention back on you rather than eyeing up the cone in the corner as a date .

Spurs are further refinement, touching a specific spot on the horse without moving your lower leg around too much.
I have hit my horse about 3 times in 15 years with a whip, rather than tapped or tickled, and it was because I needed his attention on me NOW! Because we were in a dangerous situation and I needed him to listen immediately, I didn't have time to 'talk him around' as it were. I didn't like doing it, but in all honesty with most whips that are flat edged, it's more about the noise and the shock of touch than any pain inflicted.

Again when used properly and not abused, whips and spurs are an aid to training, and not a punishment. A light touch with a whip or spur is far preferable to a hefty boot in the ribs over and over.
Horses are very sensitive, they can twitch a piece of skin at will to dislodge a fly they have felt land, they don't really need heavy handed tactics to feel things.
As with everything, there's good and bad, the above is my personal take on it, a mixture of everything I've learned over the years put into practice, my approach worked with this horse, it might not with another.
Everyone will have a different way of thinking and doing things.

CaveMum · 25/03/2021 15:26

@Maverickess

To whoever said they'd like an old retired horse - don't do it, just don't.

My horse retired early (15) due to issues that affect him ridden, and will probably end his days sooner, but he's pain free at the moment when not ridden, he lives with a 30 year old horse that is also retired.

I've worked with breeding stallions, youngsters, ex racers, fit event horses, started and trained youngsters, a lot of different breeds that are known for being highly strung, and yet never have I had so many issues with horses behaving like arseholes that the two twat bags described above.

They jump out if they fancy a new field, and if they can't jump it, they find a weak spot, in fact any spot they like and push it down, even with electric fence. They take turns in getting shocked.

They had a field shelter built with great care for their comfort and needs, which they have destroyed scratching their arses on.
They tag team you when poo picking, and whilst one distracts, the other will push the barrow over, then both run away in mock terror of the monster.
They stand at the field gate and whinny pitifully at the other liveries, delivery men, the postman and in fact anyone for food, when they have full haynets in the shelter and 2 hard feeds a day and have come out of winter looking better than they went in. They want carrots and apparently I don't supply enough.
They like to rip their own and each others rugs with expensive regularity, by hedge diving and mutual grooming - the same hedges which an hour later will be terrifying and impossible to walk past sensibly, but rather need lots of flying around snorting with tails over their backs.

Despite the fact both were trained, and stood for many years being shod quietly, treated by vets and led in headcollars, they now think the farrier is fair game to be dragged around, the vet stood on multiple times, and their headcollars would have more effect on a ten tonne truck than they do on them some days.
Horses grow old disgracefully! And I love every minute of it ❤
I am off to finish the other thread now 😊

I hear you! I used to work on a racing stud farm and we had a field with a dozen or so retired broodmares in it - they lived in the field all year round and had a giant open-sided barn for shelter. They were all 20+ in age and several of them were real racing VIPs, either through their own race records or that of their offspring.

They were an utter bunch of divas! Trying to get them in for the farrier/worming/vet checks was a nightmare, you'd be dragged up the footpath, barged into hedges, etc and the second you turned them back out again they were bucking and farting off around the field like a bunch of yearlings!