To think there’s too much sex on tv/netflix

[WiganNorthWest]

Shows that I would otherwise enjoy watching with my teenagers/other family always seem to have graphic and gratuitous very long sex scenes. I don’t think they add anything to the plot and ruin our experience of watching as a family (makes me and my teenagers uncomfortable-and I think we are fairly close/informal usually).
I’m thinking of game of thrones, Bridgerton, normal people and outlander which show a lot of sex and a lot of it is disturbing/rape. Does anyone actually enjoy watching these scenes/think they enhance shows? I wish there were ‘clean’ rated 12 versions of these shows on Netflix and you could chose which one to watch. I did enjoy sex education, and think this was done a bit more intelligently/sex scenes weren’t just there for the sake of it/a lazy way to attract viewers but were necessary for the plot.
AIBU/ a prude?

YANBU

Ido not mind some shows having a really significantly adult themes. I've been watching Delhi Crime - no sex scenes but not suitable for kids.

But a lot of what is included at the moment is really gratuitous, and basically there to either a) seem edgy or b) be eye candy for certain viewers. Both are lazy-ass writing and production. It's usually a bore to sit through and takes a way from time that could be used more productively. (What to say about things like GoT where they barely had enough time to get through any of the important material in the last seasons but spent time on sexposition instead.)

I agree too about it limiting what you can watch. I like to watch things with my older kids who are often not interested in "kids shows" but often things they'd enjoy are no god because of gratuitous sex. We've been watching some older shows to get around this, which is fine, but it's notable how much NOT having that stuff in there makes the shows better rather than worse.

I also object in terms of the kinds of working conditions it creates for actresses. Get your kit off and pretend to have sex if you want to get a big break - I'm sure we lose some great acting talent because many aren't keen.

Also the sex seems so unrealistic; the woman in ecstasy from the moment she jumps on with barely any foreplay, just 0-60 multiple orgasms thanks to a big man's golden love rod being within a half mile range of a vagina.

And lots of loud grunting and moaning, which anyone else with teenagers in the house knows, can be easily avoided if needed 😄.

I just find myself saying to my teens “it’s not like that in real life” and talking about consent. I get a lot of eye rolling.

To be honest I doubt they want to watch it with their mother either.

But it’s always females breasts on show, quick shag with the man from behind doggy style but to the younger generation looks like anal and lots and lots of organisms. My teenage sons must be thinking that all they need to do is get it out and the girls will be orgasmic!

You're not wrong @Lanique. I feel we could crowdfund a haul of asthma inhalers for the women forced to wheeze and groan to show their delight and pleasure at being treated to the joy of yet another simulated shag. "Take 17. More pleasure! Breathe harder! Groan now" Christ on a bike.

@BashfulClam

A bit left to the imagination would be better in some cases. Outlander is far too graphic sexually, there is a scene at least every episode and while I enjoy the story and history I find myself cringing a lot especially at Clare being in raptures straight away.

This at least is true to the novels which were also full of rather silly sex scenes.

When I see an actor blabbing away about how essential and tasteful the sex scenes

Hollywood coped fine without them in its golden age and graphic sex scenes on TV shows is a relatively recent addition.

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland

Yanbu. What annoys me more than anything else is that production companies will take something that already has some sexual stuff in it (eg the GoT books) and decide it needs a) more b) scenes of a more violent or gratuitous sexual nature c) extra nudity & promiscuity randomly inserted

They rarely add romantic sexual scenes but will take a scene in a tavern and move it to a brothel, or depict someone receiving a random blow job during a scene.

I'm fine with a bit of a romp and actually thought bridgerton was fine but with GoT it felt like a 14 year old boys fantasy - trying to get as many tits on show as possible.

You always had the impression that someone on the production team was SO EXCITED to be able to have scenes in a brothel. And they ramp up the brothels significantly too. Winterfell has so many prostitutes they could have serviced the whole of the North.

It's interesting because while the books can be rather gritty and aren't in any way prudish, there really is a lot less sex than in the show.

For the last years we have had our MIL living with us, now 97. We try to find things with a simple linear plot as she has dementia and can't follow anything that jumps about. Violence and too much sex is out. She likes Doc Martin and similar. She is also a big sports fan, so we thought Rush, film on James Hunt would be good for her. We settled down for an hour or two of fast action racing. The very first scene. James Hunt goes to hospital, and promptly shags a nurse across a table. He must have been a private patient. I think we are more embarrassed than she is, but nevertheless, keep to bake off and masterchef, they are safer.

I watched a programme about a book club and in one scene there was a prolonged, anal sex scene. I really didn't need a close up but there it was, in all its graphic glory. Didn't realise book clubs had become so racy.

but nevertheless, keep to bake off and masterchef, they are safer.

It's getting to the point now that if you want to watch any adult drama series that's current, you have to accept there'll be loads of sex in it.

Therefore, if for whatever reason you want to avoid it, either don't watch any adult drama or stick to UK Gold/Drama channel. It's just ridiculous. It would have been billed as a dystopian future 50 years ago.

I watched a programme about a book club and in one scene there was a prolonged, anal sex scene. I really didn't need a close up but there it was, in all its graphic glory. Didn't realise book clubs had become so racy.

There was also a bizarre random anal sex scene at the end of kingsman golden circle-very weird. And 13 reasons why had a horrific anal rape scene which contributed to the plot-but didn’t need to be so graphic and I’m sure the producers could have found another way to get the point that the kid was bullied across.

It’s a shame that many families miss out on what would otherwise be good dramas and are limited to watching bake off master chef, uk tv gold if they want to spend time watching tv together. I guess producers don’t consider this and there will be an increasing culture of teens watching (often disturbing) tv alone instead of more socially.

@greycloudysky

I watched a programme about a book club and in one scene there was a prolonged, anal sex scene. I really didn't need a close up but there it was, in all its graphic glory. Didn't realise book clubs had become so racy.

Oh no, that would put me off food for life. How did you know it was anal, he could have just entered her from behind - did she scream? I'm assuming it's a man and woman.

Yeuch.

Completely agree and most drama is directed by men

Nope, two men. It was The Book Group. It certainly made me scatter my peas.

Would also liked to have watched 'it's a sin' and 'I may destroy you' with my kids, but both too graphic

@greycloudysky

Nope, two men. It was The Book Group. It certainly made me scatter my peas.

heavens 😳🤣

I watched “I May destroy you” and there was a gay sex scene in one of the episodes. It was extremely explicit.

I don't have the same reaction to sexual/ objectifying, sexually violent stuff with men (eg pulp fiction, queer as folk).

I assume it's because I don't relate to the men/ subconsciously put myself in their shoes.

If it's the same with men then the fact there is male sexual violence against women all over the place becomes even more dodgy.

I watched Appletree Yard with DS, then about 13.

We were both

Completely agree and most drama is directed by men

Yes, but it was pretty much all directed by men in the 60s, 70s and 80s too and there was no sex scenes all over every drama show then. It's a recent thing.

Why would you want to watch 'It's a Sin' and 'I may destroy you' with your kids though? The latter is a programme about rape. Some of these examples I get, but some of them are programmes clearly intended for an adult audience.

I'm on the fence. Normal People wouldn't be Normal People without the sex. That's kind of the point of it, like a 60s French film. Sex is pretty central to the plot as it's one of the only ways Marianne can be vulnerable and intimate.

With other examples that are aimed more at a mixed audience I get it. But there are plenty of family friendly shows you CAN watch with teens. Try 'This is Us' - not much sex in that despite the adult themes.

Depends how old her kids are!

True @NiceGerbil but I just meant it's not really fair to dislike the programme because of the sex. Sex is a central point of those two programmes!

@User133847 but lots of the examples given here ARE programmes specifically either about sex or with the sex as pretty much a central part of the plot.
I do agree with some shows where it's gratuitous and definitely with that awful foreplay-less sex you get in TV but with many it's not gratuitous, it's just an adult show with sex in it, which will usually warns you at the start or in the programme notes.

Burnage, I'm talking older kids and i would like them to see a programme about consent. Normal people coulda been told with out the breasts evry 5 mins