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Original poster

Neighbour won't half in for fence

476 replies

thunderandbangs · 18/03/2021 20:36

I spoke to my neighbour over the back from me about a year ago to see if she'd be willing to half in for the back fence (fence at back of her garden, fence at back of ours) and she said yes that would be fine and to give her a quote when we had it.

Then Covid happened so we have just gotten round to it. I went over to give her quote (150 each) the other night. She then said that actually the fence at the back was our priority to fix and pay for as the posts are on her side of the garden! Confused

I said I don't think that's how it works and she said that the two fences at the left and right of her garden were her responsibility as the posts were in the neighbours garden therefore she gets the 'pretty' side of the fence meaning it's her responsibility. But as the fence at the back of the garden posts are in her garden and we get the 'pretty' side of the fence it is our responsibility.

She said she can't just go around halfing in for the upkeep of other peoples things and when the time comes she won't ask her neighbours to on either side either.

AIBU to think this is absolutely bonkers? Trying to find out if there's anything I can do to ensure she pays half as that is not how it works. She has a responsibility as well as we do.

OP posts:
Biscuitsdisappear · 19/03/2021 14:31

You can't half own a fence, its either on your property in which case you pay or its on your neighbour's property in which case they pay.

Peppafrig · 19/03/2021 14:33

Egg on your face OP now she doesn’t have to chip in or get it replaced at all

TillyTopper · 19/03/2021 14:33

Who owns the fence is on your house deeds, you need to check them. Our fences are half owned with neighbours each side but that is very unusual.

LittleTiger007 · 19/03/2021 14:33

Check house documents. It’s never shared it is the responsibility of one neighbour or the other.

LolaSmiles · 19/03/2021 14:35

What OP says on an anonymous forum is different to what she says to her neighbour. Why would you assume she would say 'oh dear it's so embarrassing for her that the deeds say it's her fence''?!
I didn't assume she's going to use those words, but between the "that girl", going round before work this morning, the smug comments about how "embarassing" the deeds are for the neighbours, and how she'll be going "straight round" later, her overall attitude is evident.

You're really reaching now. No one has said neighbour needs to give OP permission. You've basically repeated what I said that from neighbour's perspective, OP can crack on and build her fence confused
So then there's no reason for OP to go round to the neighbour later then. That's my point. The only reason for the OP to be going round with copies of the deeds is if she is expecting to try and push the neighbour into acting.

As she can build her own perfectly nice fence without troubling her neighbours, she doesn't need to be going round there again about this silly fence.

Lacucuracha · 19/03/2021 14:38

@LolaSmiles yes, you are assuming. Again, what OP posts here is not necessarily what she says to her neighbour. Do you seriously not get that?

It's not unreasonable to ask your neighbour if they want to go halves on a fence. It's also not unreasonable for the neighbour to say no.

This is really normal in RL.

babybunny123 · 19/03/2021 14:38

sneakysnoopysniper well said !!!

JosephineBaker · 19/03/2021 14:38

OP, you're being rather hard of thinking here. You can't force someone to replace their own property. If she's happy to leave it, she can.

BadFoot1 · 19/03/2021 14:43

Oh dear. Now you’re not going to be able to get a new fence at all as she may well tell you to leave her fence alone! 🙈.

Buccanarab · 19/03/2021 14:44

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

saraclara · 19/03/2021 14:45

[quote Lacucuracha]@LolaSmiles yes, you are assuming. Again, what OP posts here is not necessarily what she says to her neighbour. Do you seriously not get that?

It's not unreasonable to ask your neighbour if they want to go halves on a fence. It's also not unreasonable for the neighbour to say no.

This is really normal in RL.[/quote]
She has already asked the neighbour and the neighbour has already said no. It's what's happened after that, that's unreasonable.

greenfrogs1 · 19/03/2021 14:45

[quote Lacucuracha]@LolaSmiles yes, you are assuming. Again, what OP posts here is not necessarily what she says to her neighbour. Do you seriously not get that?

It's not unreasonable to ask your neighbour if they want to go halves on a fence. It's also not unreasonable for the neighbour to say no.

This is really normal in RL.[/quote]
erm...
She did ask. The neighbour said no. OP told us that. So yes it is kind of inappropriate for her to keep knocking.

LolaSmiles · 19/03/2021 14:46

She has already asked the neighbour and the neighbour has already said no. It's what's happened after that, that's unreasonable.
Exactly.
Most people on this thread can see this.

LolaSmiles · 19/03/2021 14:47

erm...
She did ask. The neighbour said no. OP told us that. So yes it is kind of inappropriate for her to keep knocking
And this.

It's strange to keep knocking after the neighbour has said no, and they're under no obligation to replace the fence.

megletsecond · 19/03/2021 14:51

You'll have to put your own fence up on your side of the border.

My skanky neighbours had a unsecure garden and we could walk between gardens. I've shelled out 1k on a fence because of them, and lost 6" of my garden. They couldn't give a toss. they should spend less on wine and maybe they could have put a fence up themselves.

Lacucuracha · 19/03/2021 14:51

Sigh. I'm not saying OP should speak to her again.

@LolaSmiles assumed that OP is going to go and badger her again, and I said it's possible OP just wants to say that although the fence belongs to neighbour, she is still willing to go halves.

luxxlisbon · 19/03/2021 14:53

You can't half own a fence, its either on your property in which case you pay or its on your neighbour's property in which case they pay.

This is completely not true, many people have shared fences and the fence runs exactly along the boundary - neither in one or the other garden definitively.

LST · 19/03/2021 14:54

She might decide to replace it with some twine linked to sticks

LolaSmiles · 19/03/2021 14:54

@LolaSmiles assumed that OP is going to go and badger her again, and I said it's possible OP just wants to say that although the fence belongs to neighbour, she is still willing to go halves.
But there's no need!
The neighbour isn't interested.
Doing what you say is still going round for a 3rd time in the hope the neighbour (that girl, remember) will cave in, just this time it would be done under the guise of 'I'm such a lovely neighbour who will still go halves for your fence that you have already said you don't want to be involved with, but I want to replace

OP needs to crack on with her own fence arrangements and leave the neighbour alone.

trixies · 19/03/2021 14:54

#TeamNeighbour.

I really hope she greets the news about the fence ownership with a big smile and then says that's great news, as she really didn't want to spend £150 after all, and now she doesn't have to.

Lacucuracha · 19/03/2021 14:55

@Buccanarab

Totes hilaires. Anyone who is willing to give someone the benefit of the doubt is obviously a sock.

Lacucuracha · 19/03/2021 14:55

[quote LolaSmiles]**@LolaSmiles assumed that OP is going to go and badger her again, and I said it's possible OP just wants to say that although the fence belongs to neighbour, she is still willing to go halves.
But there's no need!
The neighbour isn't interested.
Doing what you say is still going round for a 3rd time in the hope the neighbour (that girl, remember) will cave in, just this time it would be done under the guise of 'I'm such a lovely neighbour who will still go halves for your fence that you have already said you don't want to be involved with, but I want to replace

OP needs to crack on with her own fence arrangements and leave the neighbour alone.[/quote]
But I'm not saying OP needs to go round there. How many times do I have to say it?!

trixies · 19/03/2021 14:58

(The alternative happy ending for me is that the tradesperson who quoted you calls you up and insists that because you obtained a quote, you're now obliged to pay for them to carry out the work. After all, that's the basis for you thinking that your neighbour is liable to pay, right? Because she agreed to be given quote?)

DinosaurPantz · 19/03/2021 14:59

I’m not sure how that’s embarrassing for her she will have assumed it was your friends as it was you who wanted a new fence, have gone out of your way to ask her about the fence and has asked for half. She was simply explaining to you why if it was your fence she wouldn’t have to pay.. she may be agreed first not knowing, spoke to a friend about it and they told her how it works.

I assume like everyone else that if she agrees to change the fence you will pay half, otherwise... tough no new fence!

DinosaurPantz · 19/03/2021 15:00

@DinosaurPantz

I’m not sure how that’s embarrassing for her she will have assumed it was your friends as it was you who wanted a new fence, have gone out of your way to ask her about the fence and has asked for half. She was simply explaining to you why if it was your fence she wouldn’t have to pay.. she may be agreed first not knowing, spoke to a friend about it and they told her how it works.

I assume like everyone else that if she agrees to change the fence you will pay half, otherwise... tough no new fence!

Fence sorry! Not friends! I used the voice tool instead of typing lol DOH
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