To have given up on naps?

[redlipstickandtiredeyes]

I do feel bad about it because my baby is obviously tired but if you’ve done absolutely everything you can and they still don’t sleep what else can you do?

First time mum here with a shit sleeper too but I'm a few months down the line from you and want to tell you there's a light at the end of the tunnel. My baby sleeps 6pm to 7am now and has 3 naps in the day all over fourty minutes. But for a long time i was wherevyou are, I know it seems ceaseless and torturous, I used to panic when he slept about how long he'd sleep for, I dreaded being left alone with him and felt like he was torturing me.

Heres a few things I tried. I know you say you've tried everything, I'm sure it feels like that, but there may be something on the list you haven't.

• Making sure baby was as content as possible before a nap full little tummy, winded, clean bum, warm enough.
• trying to get to sleep before hes tired, by about q0 or 15 minutes. Once their tired you've kinda missed the window. Huckleberry is good for a guide but my LO only wanted to be awake an hour, 1.5 would have crippled us.
• optimal sleep conditions, warm, dark, white noise, no constricting clothing.
• persevering with a tightish swaddle.
• any sort of motion, rocking, walking, bouncing, have you tried a sling? I know you've said you tried the pram, is baby wrapped up warm, at least one extra layer to you? Have you tried bumpy terrain instead of smooth pavements?
• if in the house using a rocker or bouncer.
• rocking baby over your forearm so baby is facing the floor.
• skin to skin, safe co-sleeping can be a lifesaver.
• do you drive, car rides are fab to get a baby to sleep. I used to drive to McDonald's, have a coffee from the drive through, drive home and feel human for the first time in hours. They can't stay in thr carseat fformers than 45 minutes really but when you're used to 10 minutes thst feels like heaven.

I tried to put LO down in his basket by swaddling and rocking, if in fifteen minutes we made no progress id try the bouncer, if that didn't work id try the pram or car, if that didn't work I'd have a cry and a biscuit.

Little tricks that might help

• stroking babies nose
• a deep lullaby,
• dummy
• tight swaddle if baby startles

Also consider could it be anything medical, is baby well in themselves other than the sleep issues, have you spoken to your health visitor.

I hope I've helped in anyway at all. I'm sure you're doing most if not all of it. Oh and when baby falls asleep, if they're comfy and your comfy don't worry too much, contact naps are fine if you're not going to go to sleep.

I hear you. I gave up on naps for a while at a similar point, but I tried a lot less hard than you have.

I was wondering if your baby is taking sneaky micro-naps that stop them having a longer nap? I thought my baby didn't nap but it turned out he was effectively sleeping on the boob for 5 or 10 mins at the end of every feed, whilst appearing to be feeding and even swallowing occasionally.

By the time I figured this out my DS was old enough for me to just stop the feed when his breathing was getting rhythmic without worrying about him being deprived.

I’m so sympathetic OP, because mine would literally never nap if I didn’t make it happen. And every time I think I’ve figured out what will make him nap, he changes his mind.

For a while, he would only nap in the baby bjorn carrier while being walked outside. But that became unsustainable as he was too heavy to carry, so I’ve been training him to sleep in the pram. This has been gruelling - he takes up to 40 minutes to fall asleep sometimes, and then will often only stay asleep for 20 minutes. I walk about 20km a day with the pram to try and manage his sleep. But a couple of weeks of this has improved things - he now falls asleep faster and stays asleep for longer, so I do think he is building up that association between sleep and pram.

It’s so hard when you’re at a loss for what to do and in your own with a very young baby. It’s no good telling you that at 2 months your baby needs naps because you know that fine well! And it’s so frustrating when you’re trying your best and your baby just isn’t interested. I cried with jealousy once when a woman in my ante-natal class mentioned her baby sleeping in his cot. It’s impossible for me to imagine a time when my baby would ever do that.

I hope you find something that works. It may just take a long period of perseverance with one strategy to build up a sleep association for your baby. And if all else fails, remember that this is a season - most tricky, unsettled babies do start to settle after a few months

Honestly, don't stress. Do what you can. Its all a phase, in a year this will be a distant memory. You're doing a great job and as with most things parenting related, you'll find your way without even realising it.

All of my friends with the properly crap sleepers ended up getting a cmpa diagnosis. I’d try giving up dairy for a few weeks and seeing if it makes any difference. You’ve got nothing to lose really. While most people do understand challenging naps your baby does seem extra resistant. Eg my first preferred to nap on me, never in the cot until 11m but the car would knock her out as well.