Why do people need to show off gifts on Facebook?

[1AngelicFruitCake]

I don’t get it. Lovely seeing photos of people with Mums, messages etc. But why brag ‘I’ve been spoilt with my many presents’ then post photos of them? It just screams ‘Look at me!’ which I know Facebook is all about that but come on, it’s so needy!

YABU-people should put photos of their presents
YANBU-there’s no need to post photos of your presents

@beyondtheshoe

1AngelicFruitCake

in fairness my reply was directed to the post I actually quoted in my post!

but my point stands... are people really your "friends" if your first reaction is not to feel happy for them?

Oh sorry! 😄 I’m not the best person at replying, quoting people! I agree and I need to come off it and get rid of a few people I think!

Yanbu, it's one of the reasons I don't use social media anymore. When I did, someone used to post pictures of things they had bought, and comment saying things along the lines of: 'Ds has spoiled me today'. No he hasn't he's 10 months old!

My DH who has FB because of one of my son’s hobbies occasionally shows me stuff posted and it makes us laugh - the mum who posts pictures of her dd in hearts despite the fact that they’re at each other’s throats and the dd is off the rails. The couple who post their entire family life full of smiles and travelling but are not happily married behind closed doors and he is abusive. The singleton who posts lots of socialising and travelling shots but actually can’t hold onto relationships and is a bit of a fantasist. The mother who posts loads of happy family shots but all she really cares about is her profile and her career...

my point exactly. Social Media is to fuel gossips and bitchiness.

That's a lot of private information on here..
either you know an awful amount about a vague someone met through a "child's hobbie", or you have a very strange idea of friendships.

I just don't understand why it's not ok to say things are braggy & boastful & pretend those qualities are celebrated in real life

I've come to the conclusion that most people know what boasting and bragging is, but some like to pretend otherwise.

All the wide-eyed "but people are just sharing something nice... why are you all jealous and bitter" is probably the logic used by people who like to think everyone is envious.

Eg.Person A has a comfortably affluent life. Anyone who spends time with A would probably notice the more expensive clothing, the nice car, the nice house in a comfortably middle class area. A is getting on with life and they would talk about their weekend activities. A would never give a blow by blow account of all the ways her husband is the best and has spent all this money on her.

Person B also has a comfortable life, like A. But B manages to squeeze the fact they have a higher end car into any conversation about cars. Person B likes to draw attention to the fact that they couldn't decide between 2 designer bags, or talk about brands and other material wealth signals. B also likes to make sure everyone knows all the money that was spent on various things, they like to draw attention to the gifts from their husband etc.

Most people would entirely see that A is getting on with her life, whereas B is braggy and boastful. The likelihood is that if B heard anyone talking about boasting, they'd be the first to conclude everyone is bitter and jealous because they assume that everyone looking in is envious of them.

You've answered your own question

All the wide-eyed "but people are just sharing something nice... why are you all jealous and bitter" is probably the logic used by people who like to think everyone is envious.

or people who don't have 780 "friends" on FB but only people they are close to and not someone just to bitch about 🤷

I agree. Its not very classy is it.

because when your first judgment against someone YOU called your friend is negative, then it's on you, not on them.

Why first judgement? people make mistakes, I certainly do. Thinking a friend did something negative or something you don't agree with doesn't mean you have to end a friendship with them.

I don't think being braggy and boastful is especially pleasant, but I don't have braggy and boastful FRIENDS. So I don't need to scroll through social media to find things to smirk about.

I don't have any family or friends that post about mountains of gifts, however I can still comment on the fact other people use SM in this way. It doesn't make me smirk.

I can actually smile when my friends are happy.

I capable of doing that & acknowledging that some people like to boast on SM & recognising that can impact the younger users. #amazing!

I posted a photo of the quirky, original gift DS1 got me bacause I love it, it's very him'n'me, and I think it's a cool thing he chose. I thought those who see my Facebook stuff would similarly like it.

If anyone isn't interested I assume the scroll on, mute or unfriend as appropriate.

I wouldn’t. For the specific reason that I have Facebook friends who have lost their only child. Must be unbearable for them.

I wouldn’t do it anyway as you just don’t know how others are feeling / their situations.

I wouldn’t cancel Mother’s Day but it’ a bit crass to brag.

All the wide-eyed "but people are just sharing something nice... why are you all jealous and bitter" is probably the logic used by people who like to think everyone is envious.

There were so many threads on here where posters have discussed earnings or savings over lockdown & got ripped to threads about insensitivity but if you want to post a pic of you lying on a wad of cash that's fine 😆

It’s my Facebook page, if friends don’t like me, unfriend or mute. I only have people I like as friends maybe try that?
I also like to put gifts on so I remember them. Why are so many people Facebook friends with people they hate

Sounds like an awful of posters have very low standards if a photo or a restaurant, a bunch of flowers and a random gift qualifies "bragging"

I honestly wish I had them in my friends, I would start bragging just to wind them up and give them something to bitch about.

It's the same with holidays or restaurants: normal reaction is loving how great the location and views are (Or completely ignoring the post) , the bitchy reaction is grumbling how much it must have cost them, and how crass of them to show off

Why can't you gals just be happy for your friends who are having a nice day? Their nice day isn't why your day is bad or good. Sheesh.

I have no idea why you keep someone in your facebook feed if you dislike what they say. If you can't be happy for them, you aren't actually a 'friend' are you.

To all the people saying it’s insensitive as it’s not a happy day for everyone, I completely appreciate that but why just Mother’s Day? Nobody complains about how widowed or divorced people feel on Valentine’s Day?
After losing family members, some don’t enjoy Christmas. Should we stop posting about that?

I posted a picture of my Mother's Day gifts on FB for the memory, so in a few years I can scroll back and think "oh, I remember that, that was nice". I don't do it to show off. I like seeing what other people got too, just because I'm nosy!

@Itlod1982

To all the people saying it’s insensitive as it’s not a happy day for everyone, I completely appreciate that but why just Mother’s Day? Nobody complains about how widowed or divorced people feel on Valentine’s Day? After losing family members, some don’t enjoy Christmas. Should we stop posting about that?

No one should post anything. Ever. Anywhere.

I guess

The presents don’t bother me as such - to some people it’s a much bigger deal than others and if it makes them feel good posting it then so be it. What was odd today though was one of my friends did a video collage to herself. Her partner also posted to her from her DC so it wasn’t that she didn’t have a FB post dedicated to her anyways but she still decided to do one too. That did make me go

Most things on FB are shite.....

What was odd today though was one of my friends did a video collage to herself.

Well we are told all the time that self love is important 😁 That's a platinum level there. I am actually loving it!

one of my friends did a video collage to herself.

of herself? 😂

I do have a friend who totally would do something like that. She is absolutely stunning, completely bonkers, and the kindest soul you could ever meet. I don't think I've ever met anyone more helpful, caring and considerate.

She could totally get away with it.

If some of the bitter posters were doing such a video on the other hand..

@beyondtheshoe

My DH who has FB because of one of my son’s hobbies occasionally shows me stuff posted and it makes us laugh - the mum who posts pictures of her dd in hearts despite the fact that they’re at each other’s throats and the dd is off the rails. The couple who post their entire family life full of smiles and travelling but are not happily married behind closed doors and he is abusive. The singleton who posts lots of socialising and travelling shots but actually can’t hold onto relationships and is a bit of a fantasist. The mother who posts loads of happy family shots but all she really cares about is her profile and her career...

my point exactly. Social Media is to fuel gossips and bitchiness.

That's a lot of private information on here..
either you know an awful amount about a vague someone met through a "child's hobbie", or you have a very strange idea of friendships.

Here’s a tale for you @beyondtheshoe.

I had a dreadful marriage. ExDH was emotionally and financially abusive. I desperately didn’t want anyone to know because I worried what he would do or say. I felt awful on birthdays and Mother’s Day that everyone else had posts from their DH and I never once did. I barely had a card sometimes. A man I worked with doted on his wife and I felt like I had nothing in comparison. I tried to post nice photos and bright and breezy statuses from any trips out or holidays to cover for the fact my marriage was terrible. If I knew that someone had been laughing at my posts I would have been devastated.

Try and think next time before you sit laughing and full of smugness hey?

I'm sorry @theartofstirfry.

theartofstirfry

I think you misunderstood the post.

I am laughing at the poster who just wrote that very long of bitchy description of people they allegedly don't know as her DH is only on FB "because of one of (their) son’s hobbies".

I have FRIENDS and family on social media.
I don't use them to befriend the entire school and bitch about people's living rooms, choice of gifts or holiday photos. Unlike all the posters on here looking down at anything positive and calling it "boasting".

When I see a happy photo from a friend, I am happy for them!

burgerjack
There's something about social media that seems to really push some people's buttons and where the default reaction of anything other than praising online content equals being jealous, bitter or a sign someone needs to get off social media.

I don't really see why it's that controversial that some social media behaviours will mirror attitudes and behaviours offline.

However, any thread about money on here also attracts the 'but you're obviously jealous/envious' replies,so there's evidently a group of people in society who think that everyone must think they're awesome, want to be like them. They're probably in for a shock if they realise that isn't the case.