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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think the porn culture has a lot to do with societal misogyny?

126 replies

Imsosorryalan75 · 13/03/2021 09:28

And due to the millions of pounds made from this industry, it won't be curbed or restricted by the powers that be? It seems blatantly obvious to me that young teenage boys/men/deviants viewing readily available and mostly violent porn promotes objectifying and disrespect for women.

OP posts:
TheVanguardSix · 13/03/2021 17:14

Sicario thank you so much for this!

FluffyHippo · 13/03/2021 17:15

[quote Purplesunflowers]@MarshmallowAra
Exactly & many primary-aged children play this game. It would (rightly) be completely unacceptable to have a video game which depicted lynching or child sexual exploitation. Violence against women is unfortunately not taken as seriously.[/quote]
Grand Theft Auto is rated 18 by PEGI - that is, only to be played by adults. Not children. Not anyone under that age.

If parents and guardians can't be bothered to get involved in their children's activities and societal development and thus let them play an adult game - and as a gamer, I'm sick of squeakers in lobbies - then blame those irresponsible adults for their contribution to misogyny and violence against women.

Hexagon2 · 13/03/2021 17:33

Thanks @Sicario, survey completed.
I agree @FluffyHippo, parents should be held accountable for what their children are exposed to. Plus games companies should not be allowed to make this stuff in the first place, it's 'incitement to sexual violence', just as extremist material is monitored now for 'incitement to violence/terrorism'.

tormentil · 14/03/2021 12:09

[quote Hexagon2]@tormentil Which part of the population is interested in destabilising society and why? I'm probably being naive in not fully understanding this.[/quote]
The same one that is behind every form of destabilisation. Destabilisation such as destruction of the family, destabilisation of the community. Divide and conquer politics.

MarshmallowAra · 14/03/2021 12:36

Grand Theft Auto is rated 18 by PEGI - that is, only to be played by adults. Not children. Not anyone under that age.

That poster made the point about some games being played by children; that was an aside to my point ... Which is that people, mostly men, can rape and murder prostituted women in popular mainstream games.

It doesn't fucking matter that only adults can officially play it.

It's violence against and murder of women as entertainment in a game.

MarshmallowAra · 14/03/2021 12:38

I'm sick of squeakers in lobbies - then blame those irresponsible adults for their contribution to misogyny and violence against women.

Having that in a game for adults contributes to misogyny and violence against women.

The fact that lots of young people, mostly boys, play games like that both with and without their parents' knowledge permission is just an added issue.

Squeakers?Hmm

MarshmallowAra · 14/03/2021 12:46

Is any other vulnerable group depicted in mainstream games as sex workers, svx being raped and murdered?

Women can't defend themselves against male violence - that's why they are regularly killed by partners and ex partners. Would other groups who are vulnerable and can't defend themselves against male violence shown being raped and murdered?
Children? People with disabilities?

Why is it ok to show women?

Original poster
Imsosorryalan75 · 14/03/2021 19:09

@MarshmallowAra

There already is a prolific sub group of porn that shows children/disabled groups being raped and abused.

OP posts:
THisbackwithavengeance · 14/03/2021 19:30

Thank you all for this thread.

For me, one of the worst issues is the fact that "vanilla" sex is now mocked and fetishism aspired to. Cue women and girls pretending to be into BDSM, pissing, choking etc in order to please their men and fit in with the cool girls.

azar · 14/03/2021 20:02

Of course OP. It seems to me, that as women have made significant strides in so many areas (notably the workplace), porn has become more extreme to compensate. The more women rise to positions of authority (or even just equality), the more the need to humiliate them in porn.

If you think about it, there is no other group for which this would be acceptable. As you navigate through a free website such as YouPorn, the misogynistic captions / video titles couldn’t really be more extreme. Imagine replacing something like “bitch slapped and destroyed” with a comparable racial or homophobic slur, for instance. There would be outrage and those responsible would be (rightly) prosecuted. Yet because its women, it’s accepted. Why?

The impact on teens is a ticking time bomb. Most if not all of our husbands will be watching it, to a greater or lesser extent. Ok, they may not be watching the violent stuff. My DH says he just watches the do-called woman in woman or lesbian porn Hmm. But you can’t avoid the violent stuff as it’s playing on loop as you navigate the site to find what you are looking for and the click bait titles are becoming more extreme, so that one thing can easily lead to another. I think the world is going backwards in so many ways.

azar · 14/03/2021 20:09

Also, why is it that the plot lines of so many TV shows and movies are focused on missing, abducted or murdered women? The obligatory “evidence” photos strewn across desks or whatever. Why the obsession with this type of storyline? I’ve had enough of it and just turn it off.

AdaFuckingShelby · 14/03/2021 20:27

Azar i couldn't agree more. Normalisation of hard core porn is disturbing and insidious but so is the normalisation of violence to women and girls in so called entertainment shows based on violence and murder. It is sickening.

User133847 · 14/03/2021 20:46

It's not just porn culture though is it. Literature like 50 shades doesn't help.

VestaTilley · 14/03/2021 22:20

Completely agree - it should all be illegal.

tormentil · 15/03/2021 08:23

@User133847

It's not just porn culture though is it. Literature like 50 shades doesn't help.
And 'flowers in the attic' back when I was a young teen. What were our mothers thinking of??
Moonmelodies · 15/03/2021 08:27

@azar

Also, why is it that the plot lines of so many TV shows and movies are focused on missing, abducted or murdered women? The obligatory “evidence” photos strewn across desks or whatever. Why the obsession with this type of storyline? I’ve had enough of it and just turn it off.
Perhaps using male victims doesn't garner the same sympathy or outrage?
Gerla · 15/03/2021 08:35

Literature does not have such a strong effect and also doesn't involve abusing real people. Completely different kettle of fish!

apalledandshocked · 15/03/2021 08:37

@azar

Of course OP. It seems to me, that as women have made significant strides in so many areas (notably the workplace), porn has become more extreme to compensate. The more women rise to positions of authority (or even just equality), the more the need to humiliate them in porn.

If you think about it, there is no other group for which this would be acceptable. As you navigate through a free website such as YouPorn, the misogynistic captions / video titles couldn’t really be more extreme. Imagine replacing something like “bitch slapped and destroyed” with a comparable racial or homophobic slur, for instance. There would be outrage and those responsible would be (rightly) prosecuted. Yet because its women, it’s accepted. Why?

The impact on teens is a ticking time bomb. Most if not all of our husbands will be watching it, to a greater or lesser extent. Ok, they may not be watching the violent stuff. My DH says he just watches the do-called woman in woman or lesbian porn Hmm. But you can’t avoid the violent stuff as it’s playing on loop as you navigate the site to find what you are looking for and the click bait titles are becoming more extreme, so that one thing can easily lead to another. I think the world is going backwards in so many ways.

I hate to further depress you, but you are wrong about the racial slurs. There are some horrible horrible,videos whose titles I wont say because urgh, but that basically fetishise abuse of black women at the hands of white men. Apparently the search term "racist porn" experienced a three fold increase in use immediately after the murder of George Floyd and BLM protests. Basically, white men angry at the protests getting their anger out by watching black women being degraded. Because a lot of Porn is NOT about empowerment it is about degredation and hate.
DynamoKev · 15/03/2021 08:39

Most of the porn is coming from the USA. We are being colonised by US values.

peak2021 · 15/03/2021 08:43

Agree 100% OP. The government had plans for some form of scheme where you had to sign up to view 18+ content (cannot remember what was called) which seems to have been quietly dropped. I wonder which cabinet minister has been found to be using such sites?

KarensChoppyBob · 15/03/2021 08:50

Bloody hell, I wouldn't call 50 shades "literature" more like the idiot's guide to badly written bdsm.

Oh my. Bites lip.

TheRabbitOfCaerbannog · 15/03/2021 09:00

Because a lot of Porn is NOT about empowerment it is about degredation and hate.

💯

CherryDocsInYrBalls · 15/03/2021 09:02

I agree. Like many other posters my ex abused me as a direct result of his NPD and porn obsession. It will filtrated his whole way of thinking and viewing women. As with a lot of misogynistic abuse it was only after I did more than a year of no contact that I realised how disturbed and abusive he was. I mean, I knew porn had a massive part in the abuse in my marriage, hence the divorce and no contact, but even now I think about how porn impacts misogyny nearly every day and can't understand why it's accepted.

LadyfromtheBelleEpoque · 15/03/2021 09:09

@tormentil

Another thing to consider is that there is a segment of the population that is very, very interested in destabilising society. The widespread availability of porn is doing just this. From this perspective, it can be seen to be less about money and far more about creating chaos.

Who or which group do you think it is? I am curious as I think we all sense the change but don’t know what or who is driving it.

Namenic · 15/03/2021 09:20

I think increasing sentencing on sex crimes is a practical thing we could do. Maybe also think about how we can gather more evidence for it - eg wearing a body cam (as sometimes it can be hard to get evidence). Police could monitor those who have several complaints (but no evidence). I wonder if conviction rate would be improved if people tracked sex pests like suspected terrorists. But I guess it would raise questions over liberties - what is the boundary for safety and are there things that could be abused or lead to miscarriages of justice.

I don’t think we can police people staring or saying normal things in a threatening voice. But saying explicit things to minors - if recorded and having evidence - could maybe be charged? It’s hard as there are deep fakes etc. Similar for those who do not stop approaching someone despite being asked to desist (perhaps pestering journalists might be caught by that too - but maybe that isn’t a bad thing).

Make any strangulation a crime - such that there is no defence for it in sex gone wrong - even if consensual. We don’t allow drink driving or people to kill/maim others (even if consensual), why should we allow risky sex?

I think the internet is hard to police. It would be possible to treat violent porn like child porn, but I think there would be a lot of opposition to that - and it would be a bit anomalous given we have lots of v violent non sexual films and video games.