Police advising women not to walk alone at night

[Bubbinsmakesthree]

I’ve seen a lot of friends outraged at the Met police locally advising women not to walk alone at night in the days following the disappearance of Sarah Everard. I’ve seen a posts along the lines of ‘how about telling men not to attack women instead?’

I absolutely agree with the wider point that we should be asking the question “how do we make it safe for women?” not “how do women stay out of danger?”

But in this case, was the police’s advice not just the equivalent of advising people to stay out of the water following a shark attack?

I’m so upset and angry about Sarah Everard but I cannot get incensed about the police advising women to take precautions when an unknown attacker may have still been in the area.

The Yorkshire Ripper was attacking women in the 1970’s and 80’s. We should have moved on since then. If you watched The Ripper the women were blamed for their attacks, some of them smeared as sex workers when they were not.

@ cerseii
Thank you, I’ve thought I missed something.

Wouldn't it be amazing if there was even the option of "Men are under a curfew and are not allowed out after 6pm" so that the police could detain any man breaking the curfew and women could walk safe.

Just a thought experiment.

I've seen lots of headlines this week about women experiencing abuse and violence. It's all written quite passively, without naming who is doing the abuse and violence. What if there were stats about x% of men have been violent or abusive. I'd really like the narrative to start centring the problem on male violence.

@x2boys

It might get feel like victim Blamey ,but if there is an opportunistic attacker ,on the streets who is determined to attack a lone women ,then they will do that regardless ,I was watching the ripper on Netflix a few weeks ago ,women were advised to walk together ,don't go anywhere alone etc .

So what do you do if you live alone, are not near any friends or family, and don’t work a 9-5 day job? If your shift starts at 9pm and it’s a 10 minute walk to the tube station, how do you get there without walking alone? It’s advice that many women don’t have the luxury of being able to take.

[quote greenlynx]@PicsInRed
Could you post where have you seen that he possibly used COVID law?
Thanks.[/quote]
It's in a couple of publications. Here's one.

metro.co.uk/2021/03/11/sarah-everard-family-of-arrested-police-officer-break-their-silence-14226578/

It’s also said detectives are investigating whether he used the lockdown restrictions to stop Sarah as she walked home to Brixton

It's a symptom of the whole issue .

It leads to a culture where women are held responsible for men's behaviour.

Makes me rage that in the year 2021 the solution to male violence is to tell women to change their behaviour.

Exactly this.

I'm quite emotional over this, I just keep thinking enough! I'd like to see some sort of universal salute to her, similar to the 'kneel' happen, something we can all do, something to start change, something that won't make this poor woman just another statistic and news story and forgotten about in time.
There's a lot of anger and emotion around right now, I feel we need to use it.

@x2boys

It might get feel like victim Blamey ,but if there is an opportunistic attacker ,on the streets who is determined to attack a lone women ,then they will do that regardless ,I was watching the ripper on Netflix a few weeks ago ,women were advised to walk together ,don't go anywhere alone etc .

Place a curfew on men then. Job done.

Whilst I agree the message comes across as victim blaming it us a good rule for me to follow.
I know men shouldn't rape
I know that men shouldn't kill
However they still do. Guardian angels aren't going to save me if one is on the prowl and sees me as a target.
I can't rule out all risk but I can do my best to reduce it and not put my self in a vulnerable position.
I might not like having to so that but so be it.

i rather suspect many women will follow the advice and be mindful of risk and trying to stay safe. That seems reasonable; nobody wants other women to suffer harm at the hands of a stranger making an unprovoked attack. Thankfully these things are very rare but the fear isn't and women need to allow themselves to feel safe - even if that means accepting limitations on what they do. I don't begrudge any woman feeling they don't want to walk home alone at night; it doesn't worry me but I can see why others are frightened.

Of course men should be raised to be respectful and not to be violent. They need to understand what informed consent means. They need to have empathy and modify their behaviours to reduce the distress their behaviours cause in women.

Sadly, psychopathic deviants aren't very likely to respond to polite requests to walk on the other side of the street and put their knife away. That being the case and having no way of enforcing consistently lawful behaviour, I advise my young women to take measures to remain alive and unharmed.

Wouldn't it be amazing if there was even the option of "Men are under a curfew and are not allowed out after 6pm" so that the police could detain any man breaking the curfew and women could walk safe.

Yes and none of this I need to go to/get home from/ be at work bullshit either, thry either get there or get home before curfew starts or risk getting arrested. Might focus some minds if men had to change their behaviour because of the way other men are behaving.

In London in particular, if you don't live with your friends, getting home 'safely' is almost impossible. You travel the Tube- then what, fly to your house? A taxi won't take you a 5 min walk. Even if you take taxis, which are expensive, the taxi driver could attack you/rape you, John Worboys for example. Even if you got out of a taxi, you have to get to the door and into a shared lobby. Finally, inside the property you are at risk of being attacked by someone within it, as there were plenty of examples of today with a woman with four children being strangled and her partner getting only a suspended sentence.

You can't win, you can't escape, you just can't play the game differently to ensure your own safety. Men of course are attacked by other men but no-one suggests they stay home after 6pm at night or don't do shift work.

Place a curfew on men then. Job done.

That's disproportionate. You can't blame a whole group for the actions of one person. Most men do not murder strangers.

Plus it would probably have the reverse effect in that law abiding men would stay home, so there would be fewer people about generally to deter the small number of opportunist criminals.

This sort of crime is vanishingly rare and there's no need for anyone to change their behaviour, apart from in the immediate aftermath until they make sure they've got the person that did it. Which is exactly what they've advised

Police policing the man curfew doesn’t sound a great idea given it was a policeman wot done it.

@PicsInRed

Better recent evidence suggests it's policemen who shouldn't walk alone at night lest they abduct and murder a woman.

The police have said they're investigating the possibility that the suspect used covid law to detain Sarah.

If that's true - especially given how women sitting on benches and taking coffee walks with friends were frequently detained (in public) for a stern chat and a fine, and considering how little fuck they have to give about rape and domestic violence victims - I couldn't be less interested in anything they have to say ever again.

I feel similarly.

The police need to get their own bullying, toxic culture sorted.

They whinge about people not engaging with them, not respecting them, not trusting them. Label anyone with criticism as "anti-police" . Silence anyone who challenges.

Many police officers are violent to women but face no consequences because "blue family" .

I want to know what policing plans to do to restore trust. After all the incidents of abuses of power in the last year alone, it is their responsibility to enable us to feel safe around them. Statements along the lines of "not all police" don't cut it.

How would a curfew realistically work? My DH works shifts so on a late shift he's driving home after 11pm ,he drives but what about men working shifts who don't drive ,how will they get home from work?

YABU OP, I am incensed by this.

A much better message from the police would be:
Men Stay At Home or Have A Good Reason To Be Out. This would protect women and men.

Not seen the advice.

Is the met really saying that because this crime has been committed, and they have the prime suspect. IE he is off the streets.

Approximately 4.5 million women and girls in the met area should not go out at night (after dark- it's dark here right now at 7pm) by themselves?

??!!??

@APigInACage

Police policing the man curfew doesn’t sound a great idea given it was a policeman wot done it.

How about the police men are home, and armed police women patrol the curfew?

It's no less ridiculous than women being confined to barracks with the men most likely to kill them for being targeted for attack.

Why haven't they advised women to avoid engaging with police?

If it's about risk management then that would seem very sensible advice.

How would a curfew realistically work?

Well, we had one here at the start of 2021. If you were out between 8pm and 6am you needed good reason, like work.

If the police and the government are so concerned about women walking in darkness at night, how about making the night an hour shorter by stopping the antiquated practice of putting clocks back in winter?

@ PicsInRed
Thank you. BBC hasn’t got anything yet neither Sky news. If it’s true it’s outrageous.

I grew up very locally and it has shocked us but the truth is it is even in London very very rare to be abducted of the street by a stranger however I don’t think it’s wrong in making women safety aware regarding ( walking with friends etc ) it doesn’t mean it’s their fault however if something happens them in these circumstances.

There will always be evil people luckily the minority. Not teaching then saggers measures would be irresponsible and relying in the psychos to do the right things is probably not the best option.

Sounds like a plan, @PicsInRed

How about men having to be restricted more because of male violence than women always having to restrict their lives

We might see an attitude change then