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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that violence against women is a hate crime?

137 replies

Wandawomble · 11/03/2021 08:28

AIBU - it’s not a hate crime
YAIBU - it is a hate crime

I think so many of us are upset by the constant news of women being assaulted, raped and murdered - and the horrific statistics about the majority of young women in the UK having been sexually harassed. (Guardian link below)

I am a BAME woman and I experience misogyny in the same way that I experience racism, if anything the misogyny is worse. I do not feel safe walking home late, I have had multiple attacks on my physical body by men because of my sex and multiple attacks of my body because I am brown.
It is no different except with being a diminutive female - I have been more easily overpowered and the sexual assaults have been much much worse. So how is this not a hate crime?

I was pulled into a strangers car on the way to school once and assaulted because of my female body. Can you imagine how I feel about my daughter walking to school? I do not understand how any person can not see this as hate towards women. It is certainly not love.

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/world/2021/mar/10/almost-all-young-women-in-the-uk-have-been-sexually-harassed-survey-finds

WHO says 1 in 3 women globally experience domestic violence. www.who.int/en/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/violence-against-women

OP posts:
Original poster
Wandawomble · 11/03/2021 08:29

Typo - should say YANBU

OP posts:
Shoxfordian · 11/03/2021 08:30

I agree
Domestic violence has risen during lockdown and 2-3 women a week are killed by a partner or former partner in the uk.

EshSchools · 11/03/2021 08:30

Yanbu ... the men who assault, abuse and harrass women must have absolute disdain or hatred for us

Original poster
Wandawomble · 11/03/2021 08:34

Also if you are saying AIBU what possible logic are you using for this when you look at actual statistics and what I am saying about my experience of both racism and sexual assault?

OP posts:
Dragongirl10 · 11/03/2021 08:35

It is so often that one can hear the disdain and contempt so many men have for women in everyday life, that we barely notice it...it is truly frightening. I am so very worried for my teen DD as she goes out into the world.

daretodenim · 11/03/2021 08:37

I totally agree that it's a hate crime. Or should be.

It's also not a coincidence that it isn't listed as one.

CrunchyBiscs · 11/03/2021 08:37

This is a recent thread
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/womens_rights/4188330-Scotttish-Hate-Crime-Bill-part-3
Hatred against cross dressers and trans women - a crime, hatred against actual women - not

LaceyBetty · 11/03/2021 08:38

Agree that it is a hate crime and should be treated as such at law.

Original poster
Wandawomble · 11/03/2021 08:42

In the country my parents come from females are aborted in favour of males. How is this not hate?

OP posts:
PawPawNoodle · 11/03/2021 08:44

I voted YABU because I would like to see any offence against a person based on their sex or gender be considered a hate crime, not just those committed as a result of misogyny.

YANBU to want it to be a hate crime, but my view is that it should be applied broadly.

Theluggage15 · 11/03/2021 08:48

Yes, it is a hate crime. A woman on Twitter was saying that wolf whistling and cat calling women is no big deal and I was thinking about how I just accepted it when I was younger as part of life although I hated it and did not find it flattering, (can’t believe some people think it is flattering) but actually how very unpleasant it was and sometimes there was a sense of aggression behind the comments etc. from men.

Lots of comments and articles in the last couple of days have stated that women are not safe walking on their own at night and there have been so many responses of ‘nor are men’, completely missing the point that it’s male violence that’s the problem and minimising what it’s like for women.

PicsInRed · 11/03/2021 08:52

@PolPotNoodle

I voted YABU because I would like to see any offence against a person based on their sex or gender be considered a hate crime, not just those committed as a result of misogyny.

YANBU to want it to be a hate crime, but my view is that it should be applied broadly.

Yeah, shall we deal with the group murdered and brutalised on a regular, weekly basis first? The women-women? Yeah? Yeah, let's do that.
newstart1337 · 11/03/2021 08:53

Surely all crimes are hate crimes.

I dont understand what that even means?

FOJN · 11/03/2021 09:01

I voted YABU because I would like to see any offence against a person based on their sex or gender be considered a hate crime, not just those committed as a result of misogyny.

I think you have missed the point. Disability, race, religion, transgender identity and sexual orientation are already covered under hate crime legislation, it's the fact that women have been left out which is the issue.

I agree with a PP, misogyny not being a hate crime is not an oversight. The courts simply would not be able to cope with the scale of it so we normalise it because it's the more cost effective option and women simply don't matter that much!

PawPawNoodle · 11/03/2021 09:03

@PicsInRed why do you have to deal with women specifically when you can just go 'any offence against a person that is based on their sex or gender'?

Women are by far the biggest victims of sex-based crimes but to exclude all others when they can be included very easily is not progressive.

Coffeeandcocopops · 11/03/2021 09:05

Of course it’s a hate crime. It’s based on sex which is a protected characteristic just as race, age, disability, gender reassignment are.

Coffeeandcocopops · 11/03/2021 09:07

It’s not a hate crime because the courts would be overwhelmed. Some police would also need to change their attitude.

araiwa · 11/03/2021 09:08

So what will change going forward if they are classed as hate crimes?

FOJN · 11/03/2021 09:08

Women are by far the biggest victims of sex-based crimes but to exclude all others when they can be included very easily is not progressive.

Other people are covered by existing legislation. Tell me why I should prioritise being progressive over women's safety. Is this yet another way of telling women to shut up when they have the temerity to put their needs first.

Gerla · 11/03/2021 09:12

Yes of course it is. But we are not allowed to see misogyny as a hate crime because....reasons. We are just supposed to put up with it and not join the dots.

AvocadoBathroom · 11/03/2021 09:20

It's a hate crime. Women are assaulted, raped, aborted and as we are seeing yesterday, murdered BECAUSE of their biological sex. The harassment women face online is pure hatred. It's difficult to look at those statistics and not come to the conclusion that men hate women. Being charitable I say that not all men hate women. However, someone is doing the assaulting.

At my daughter's school, one of the boys set up a Whatsapp group called "I hate women" and they were sharing photos of dead women. The boys are 12. This is a hate crime.

Racism and misogyny are the same. I am BAME and I experience both the same too.

WendyTestaburger · 11/03/2021 09:24

Let's see if I can phrase this without getting deleted.

Plenty of receipts on twitter show that many prominent transwomen who are trans rights activists actually enjoy catcalling. They don't feel especially threatened and they enjoy feeling validated.

That's fine on a personal level. Humans are complex and diverse creatures.

The problem is that the brand of faux feminism that they aggressively promote is the only socially acceptable brand. It's why misogyny isn't a hate crime.

The women who have the cultural capital of being middle class and under 30, which often comes with the benefit of not yet being stuck doing unpaid care for babies and elders, mostly subscribe to this faux feminism. It's heartbreaking because other women (women over 30, not middle class, carers, not white etc etc) really need all women to be able to group together on this. But the faux feminists fall over themselves to make sure they don't upset transwomen whilst quite understandably expressing their fear of being attacked. The faux feminists also quite viciously tear down women who suggest that perhaps less privileged women than them, prisoners, women seeking refuge, deserve protection too.

Blackberrycream · 11/03/2021 09:48

YANBU
Racism and misogyny are discrimination and hate directed at a group of people based on their identity. I have often thought this on threads where women are denying unconscious bias in terms of race. It’s the subtle ways that you are treated differently and as a woman that should be easy to understand. Violence against women is so ingrained in society in actions and imagery .
Excellent post @WendyTestaburger
Rights are being given away

Whatcouldshehavebeen · 11/03/2021 09:54

I see it more as aggression? A mother presumably reared them, so I don't understand how so many can be so violent. I've been the victim of criminal behaviour from men several times. I think that boys are reared differently to girls. They also have different hormones, different levels of strength and height. A power thing too maybe? Boys are not being reared to be nice.

Moomin12345 · 11/03/2021 09:59

I haven't heard of many 'love crimes'. I think all crimes are hate crimes.