To think hairdressers should try to make you feel good?

[Opal93]

Writing this thinking of how much I miss my hairdresser 😭 I’ve finally found one who does exactly what I ask and when I leave I feel really good. I can’t wait to finally go! But before I found her, I went to many who seemed to think insulting you is somehow a good business tactic! I also hate it when they begin to criticise the cut/colour you currently have. I once went to one and she said “your roots are a disgrace” erm, that’s what I’m paying you for! What’s your best and worst experiences of the hairdressers and are you excited to finally go after lockdown?

YANBU. That's the only reason some people go to the hairdressers to be pampered and made a,fuss of and to feel good, and. The ones going there for cosmetic reasons "know" their hair probably needs work or they wouldn't be there in the first place

YANBU, and to make it even more infuriating, most hairdressers aren’t even fit for purpose.

They only know how to cut thin, straight hair - and if your hair isn’t thin or straight, they’ll trim it, blow dry it straight, and then finish the cut.

Why can’t they work with wavy or curly hair?

I said to one hairdresser that my hair is naturally wavy, and I’d love to be able to embrace it. Her response was to wash it, trim it, blow dry it, and then finish cutting it. I mean...!?

Desperate situations call for desperate measures. I took a scissors to my own hair this week and gave myself a bouncy blunt cut bob. I'm delighted with it. I've got good thick straight hair that's relatively easy to style turned under. It's what I'd been asking the stylists in my local salon to give me over the past few years and they have failed to deliver, I walk out with static straight hair and wispy bits down my neck that drive me potty. I don't think I'm going back after lockdown eases. I last had my colour done in January 2020 and can see a huge difference in condition between my natural hair and my dyed ends. My natural hair is so much glossier and there is a definite line where it meets the coloured hair. In about 6 months it should be fully grown out. Then I'll see if I can live with the greys - unfortunately it's mostly white around my front hairline.

I've never enjoyed going to the hairdresser but they've mostly been polite and courteous. Some of your experiences have been awful.

I've had one bad experience when I was trying to find a new salon when pregnant as I reacted to my old salons dye.

The new salon did a consultation' dye test which ok and agreed a price booking a future date.
Then proceeded to call me a few days later to say actually your hair is too hard to do you'll need to go to a specialist for curly hair. Its got too many needs.

Now my hair is curly bit I have never had an issue with any other hairdresser before
Its curly but manageable.
I really felt I was being discriminated against.

I can’t say I’ve ever had a completely horrendous visit to a salon but the type I particularly hate are the ‘bitchy’ ones. The last salon I went to before my current one was terrible for that. My stylist left under what appeared to be a bit of a cloud and after that I was just booked in with whoever was free (which I’d didn’t like and wish now I’d had the balls to say!). The last visit before lockdown annoyed me because 3 of the stylists were all standing around the sinks bitching about the owner and how he never sorted out all the issues within the salon (owner had recently moved abroad). That may be the case but how unprofessional to say it in front of customers?! 😳 I was glad when the first lockdown happened in that it meant I never had to go back and/or have to make an excuse about not booking another appointment etc. 😆

After years of disaster hair cuts I finally found a brilliant hairdresser. Who knew exactly how to trim my hair, was always happy. But the manger/owner is awful. She's loud as hell, voice booms across the salon and makes snidy comments which everyone hears. When it got to the point when I was dreading going for a cut I knew it was time to leave after 5 years. Luckily have found another good egg who knows a trim.

I remember going to a new salon for a consultation for colour and the guy was absolutely brutal about my hair. He said that I didn’t have much hair whilst combing/parting my hair and grimacing. I dunno why but that really stuck with me. Looking back, I had an normal head of fine hair but he was behaving like I was suffering with severe hair loss! I felt insecure for a while after!

Urgh I hate it. All of it. When you have to talk in the mirror looking at the stylist it feels so unnatural and you realise how ugly you are 😂 my dh whacks it off once a year and I don't many greys yet , so I just box dye a couple of times a year.

I don’t make conversation. I take my book out and read. Or just say I’m tired and close my eyes throughout. I’ve done this for years and maybe I’m the weirdo who does that but everyone lets me be. I don’t remember overhearing any catty remarks either.

Some of the experiences here sound awful.

[quote Unsuremover]@museumum can you say which town, or hopefully it’s a chain? Sounds delightful.
I have crazy amounts of hair, really thick and every hairdresser moans about how much dye it takes and how long it takes to blow dry. One even moaned they thought I’d have a load fall out after I gave birth but it didn’t. I have said surely it balances out if they have lots of clients with thin hair. Extends to my body hair too. Apparently strange on such a white woman. Okay fine but it’s not like I control how much hair I grow! And I can’t get my eyebrows waxed more than every 4 weeks, I have other things to do![/quote]
I get the same - I have loads of hair and they always complain it takes too long to die/dry/cut. Before lockdown 1 I was getting my eyebrows threaded every fortnight - necessity taught me to do it myself otherwise I'd be peering through them by now 😂 that's a nice few pounds saved! Just need to learn how to cut my hair now!

I had a (much older than me but much trendier than me) hairdresser tell me my hair looked "awful and witchy". I was about 30 years old, dark hair, pale skin and some greys coming through. The comment has stuck with me for the past 7 years and I never went back to her.

I used to go to a lovely salon and was always happy with my hair. It was £££ but it was a nice environment and I always left feeling happy and like I’d had a real treat. Since I’ve moved from that area, I’ve never found a salon I’m happy with. I’ve been colouring and trimming my own hair in lockdown and I’m really pleased with how it looks, so I will only be going to a salon for an occasional trim now. My last hairdresser used to talk about clients behind their back and laughed at me when I said how I wanted my colour. I’ve easily coloured my hair how I wanted with a cheap box dye.

So I'm a hairdresser of a 30 yrs experience and these stories make me cringe, I would hate any of my clients, to feel like this, I've had some of my clients for 20 odd yrs, so I guess I'm doing something right, but I'm gonna but a different spin on this. Some clients do feel that because they are paying for your service they can say what the hell they like to you. I have had very blunt hurtful comments on my weight which yo-yo's, I'm either too fat or thin, I've had comments on my Asd son, calling him a retard and telling me it's my fault he's like this cause I gave him his jabs as a baby, comments on my marriage because I choose not to wear a ring so therefore it must be an unhealthy one, I've not reacted once to a single comment, I've carried on and been professional because that's my job and they are paying my wages.
Just thought I'd share it's not always the hairdresser that's rude and if they are vote with your feet and your purse.

Some of these strike a chord with me. @Leeds3 - I share your pain. I tried a hairdresser once who said I can't do that because of your low hairline at the back. She then said "Have you never seen it?" - er, no because it's at the back of my head and I'm not a contortionist! She then proceeded to make a big song and dance about showing me whilst encouraging her colleagues to come and have a good gawp too! I felt like an exhibit. Needless to say I didn't cross her threshold again.

@StillCounting123 - I have exactly the same colouring and started going grey about six years ago. I have decided not to dye my hair. The reaction from hairdressers is unbelievable. It's like I've committed the ultimate betrayal!!! My hair is now almost waist length (as am ECV and have been shielding for a year). I do want to get it cut and keep thinking I must book an appointment for the summer, but I keep putting it off and can feel my blood pressure rising!!

FWIW I am now embracing my inner witch (as I already have the outer witch downpat ). My teenage DD informed me a few months ago that her friends think I am a witch so I thought Imight as well live up to it. Told her that they better be good to her or I might put a spell on them

I’m convinced that it’s a deliberate tactic to point out all the flaws and what’s wrong with your hair at the beginning to make you feel really shit about it so that you are ‘grateful’ and ‘love’ whatever they end up doing to it - ‘see, I’ve SAVED your hair for you, you came in a mess and now look how AMAZING you are and it’s all down to ME and my MAGIC SCISSORS!’

Almost don't want to admit that I'm a hairdresser after reading these! I got out of salons due to the awful atmosphere with the other stylists bitching about clients constantly. I work freelance and teach future stylists. I would never make personal comments regarding someone's hair condition or belittle them. I also warn my clients that I don't talk much when working as I like to give my full attention to the job, most are grateful. I can't bear idle chit chat for the sake of it. Most of my clients have been with me for about 20 years now, it's all about gaining trust.

When I was pregnant I started going to a new salon round the corner from me, as it was convenient not to have to heft my massive bulk too far.

For 9 months she cut my hair where we chatted about babies and kids and pregnancy, and I even had a haircut booked on the day my waters broke! Nothing was happening so I’d been advised to carry on as normal so I went to the appointment and told my hairdresser- cue lots of excited squealing about baby’s impending arrival etc etc

12 weeks later I ventured out for my first haircut post birth and during a conversation she asked me if I had any kids!

I mean, I don’t expect her to remember my life story but really? I managed to remember that her mum had broken her hip six months ago and asked after her. It just showed me that she was clearly not invested at all in me as a client and that it was all an act.

I never went back.

How weird! Why would anyone go to a hair stylist with perfect, rootless hair? You go because it needs doing. If I had my roots pointed out to me I'd say 'well that's why I'm here haha'. Duh.

Sometimes its because they are trying to upsell stuff. So I had someone bang on and on about the dreadful condition my hair was in because he wanted to sell me the Salon's brand of keratin hair conditioner to use at home - 30 pounds a bottle!!! The more expensive the place the worst they are for that. Fortunately I found a cheap place who dont do this.

@freeandfierce

Almost don't want to admit that I'm a hairdresser after reading these! I got out of salons due to the awful atmosphere with the other stylists bitching about clients constantly. I work freelance and teach future stylists. I would never make personal comments regarding someone's hair condition or belittle them. I also warn my clients that I don't talk much when working as I like to give my full attention to the job, most are grateful. I can't bear idle chit chat for the sake of it. Most of my clients have been with me for about 20 years now, it's all about gaining trust.

Ahhhh, you sound perfect! I also hate idle chit chat (I am just bad at small talk) but I cant really say because that feels really snobby/standoffish, so we end up having very stitlted conversations. Sigh.

One of best tips I was given by a hairdresser when looking for a new one is to choose one with similar hair to yourself. For example, if you have a lot of thick or naturally curly hair then find a hairdresser with the same - they will know all the benefits and all the disadvantages.

I was a hairdresser for over ten years and some of these stories are bloody awful!
We would never make bad comments and getting to know your clients properly is a privilege. Really sad for people who have had negative comments, anyone who feels they have thin hair I massively recommend NIOXIN you can get it online and sometimes in tk max and they used to do a 30 day money back guarantee. I have seen amazing results from the products and huge boosts in confidence in my clients.

We always knew when people wanted to chat and when they wanted to just relax, either is always fine. I’ve had clients who have honestly been like family and I know first hand in a good salon you will be treated just like a friend also, I would never want to make anyone feel uncomfortable!

Stay away from the thinning scissors!!!

@Anniecott

So I'm a hairdresser of a 30 yrs experience and these stories make me cringe, I would hate any of my clients, to feel like this, I've had some of my clients for 20 odd yrs, so I guess I'm doing something right, but I'm gonna but a different spin on this. Some clients do feel that because they are paying for your service they can say what the hell they like to you. I have had very blunt hurtful comments on my weight which yo-yo's, I'm either too fat or thin, I've had comments on my Asd son, calling him a retard and telling me it's my fault he's like this cause I gave him his jabs as a baby, comments on my marriage because I choose not to wear a ring so therefore it must be an unhealthy one, I've not reacted once to a single comment, I've carried on and been professional because that's my job and they are paying my wages. Just thought I'd share it's not always the hairdresser that's rude and if they are vote with your feet and your purse.

Wow 😪 I am so sorry people were so shit to you! I'd never have them back, tbh, or at least until they learn some basic manners

My hairs a mix of afro and frizz and I didn't wash my hair before going to the hairdresser as they wash it. I did was it 1 day before though. I use products to tame my hagrid hair and said 'sorry I haven't washed it today' and she commented 'yea it feels well dirty'. Umm.... I think that's just my hair texture love sorry it's not silky straight. Was a bit annoyed.

I trained as a hairdresser and as a 16 or 17 year old apprentice my male boss and an older lady client discussed how fat I was getting and how much my boobs had grown as I was stood there holding the foils for him as he highlighted her hair.