To think hairdressers should try to make you feel good?

[Opal93]

Writing this thinking of how much I miss my hairdresser 😭 I’ve finally found one who does exactly what I ask and when I leave I feel really good. I can’t wait to finally go! But before I found her, I went to many who seemed to think insulting you is somehow a good business tactic! I also hate it when they begin to criticise the cut/colour you currently have. I once went to one and she said “your roots are a disgrace” erm, that’s what I’m paying you for! What’s your best and worst experiences of the hairdressers and are you excited to finally go after lockdown?

I feel as if I am reading a different world with the comments here. Never had anything remotely like this.

I did smile at the person whose hairdresser thought they were cutting hair of someone who did not speak fluent French.

I've avoided hairdressers for years. I hate the ultra styled image that they try generally to create with lighting etc. I feel like I'm invading before I even sit down because I'm just not an ultra polished stylish person.

However I accidentally found a wonderful salon locally. The staff are very genuine or bloody good at acting that way all cut to a very high standard and the whole salon is built around a natural/vegan friendly approach. The result is somewhere that feels warm and welcoming with excellent customer service and haircuts.

I can't wait to go back and have my haircut been though I can't afford it. They are now my gold standard of hairdressers, I won't accept anything less.

@Magicbabywaves

*Youllbeoldertoo I’ve never had any Critical comments about my hair, but I’ve had waxers be rude before, I just say look I’m paying you here. You’re not doing me a favour and that shuts them up. You sound delightful.*

Did you miss the part where she said waxers had been rude to her?

My hair is fine, not thin, but also curly so it is tricky to work with, but I had a hairdressers practically sneering at ‘how thin’ it was and that I should get a treatment. I was so upset afterwards and everyone told me it wasn’t true, but it actually led to years of worry and paranoia. These things run deep.

No, I did read that.

I love my current hairdressers but I stopped going to the last one as the salon owner made me feel awful. He came over and looked at my hair and said 'I didn't realise how white you are, it must be at least 90%'. Now it might be true but I don't need some random pointing it out so the whole salon could hear (he never cut or coloured my hair).

I'm confused @DobbyTheHouseElk , why are you being sarky to the poster? If you're paying someone/anyone to do a job and they're rude to you while doing it, what's wrong with reminding them it's paid work - not a favour? It's literally the right, truthful thing to do!

@Opal93

Hmmm I sort of agree. The one I have now is fab and I love her. She does what I ask and never complains or says anything else.

One hairdresser however, that I had circa 2009-2010, always had something negative to say to me. I took DD there for her haircut and highlights when she was 16-17ish. Even when I wasn't having mine done, I would sit there with her, and the hairdresser would say to DD 'your mum's hair looks like it could do with a cut doesn't it?' DD just sat there blankly.

The hairdresser continued 'shall we cut your mum's split ends?' I felt so shit about my hair that when she said 'you next mum eh?' I just got up and said 'err ok...' This happened 3 or 4 times. Nice little extra £20 there on top of the £60 I was paying for DD for her cut and colour. I know I should have not been bullied into it, and I wouldn't be now!

Also, sometimes when she cut my hair, she would look at the colour (I did it myself as it was £3.99 for a colour kit and suited me OK and looked fine.) She would say 'oh dear, home dye! Come on Patti, surely you care about your hair more than this!' There was nothing wrong with the dye I had put on, and nothing wrong with my hair; she was just wounded and sore because she wasn't getting £45 off me to do what I could do myself for £3.99!

She also kept CONTINUALLY trying to get me to have the inverted bob haircut, which I HATE. It would not have suited me. My hair is wavy/curly (like Kim Wilde's here, but 3-4" longer,) and I like it as it is. She kept telling me I NEED to change the style. And as I said, she kept trying to push the inverted bob on me. Very annoying.

Needless to say, after a year or so, me and DD found another hairdresser!

@museumum can you say which town, or hopefully it’s a chain? Sounds delightful.
I have crazy amounts of hair, really thick and every hairdresser moans about how much dye it takes and how long it takes to blow dry. One even moaned they thought I’d have a load fall out after I gave birth but it didn’t. I have said surely it balances out if they have lots of clients with thin hair. Extends to my body hair too. Apparently strange on such a white woman. Okay fine but it’s not like I control how much hair I grow! And I can’t get my eyebrows waxed more than every 4 weeks, I have other things to do!

I’ve sent you a pm.

I have lovely thick hair and masses of it, I went to the hairdressers once and she told me I was starting with alopecia I was distraught I booked in with my GP as my husband said he couldn’t see anything wrong, the Gp said he couldn’t see anything and as I hadn’t been loosing hair it almost definitely meant I didn’t have alopecia.

The same hair appointment the same hairdresser kept saying how my natural dark hair could do with dying the same colour to give it more of a shine.

I never went back and I was so upset after the whole debacle it’s put me off going to the hairdressers I only go once a year now 😬

I am probably the dull boring client, I know what I want, the colour I like and would rather not chat too much. I also hate the head massage so please don’t even try. It’s took me a while to find a salon and hairdresser that just let me be. But I tip, I do feel sorry for my hair dresser as I am not an ideal client

Oh I just thought of another one, had a wedding to attend so got my hair cut and coloured three days before so it looked fresh. The hairdresser knew I was going to a wedding but OMG the amount of hair dye on my skin was horrendous I’ve never seen anything like it! It was all running down my face, my ears were covers as was my neck. I stupidly didn’t say anything as I assumed she had a special solution to get it off or something.

I looked terrible I scrubbed and scrubbed until I attended the wedding with grazes and scars all over my head, I looked a sight!

A hairdresser I went to said, "Oh dear, you've got an unfortunate low growing hairline." I'd never noticed and have felt self-conscious about it ever since.
I discussed transitioning my dyed hair to natural grey with a different hairdresser and she said I had a "sad" hair colour.
Nevermind, there's plenty of hairdressers out there, it's easy enough to find a different one who has a little tact.

I found an amazing hairdresser she cuts my hair dry (which works better for my weird hair) and does it in around 10 minutes and charges me £15, she does as I ask, has never told me to dye my hair and I can go about my day after she has cut my hair, I've been to so many that do a dreadful blow dry and I have to go home and redo it myself.

The two worst experiences were a very posh salon where she constantly went on about colouring my hair and could understand how I could have grey hair and not want to cover it when I was mid thirties, she got no tip and I never went back.

The second managed to do two different hair cuts on either side of head, I only went there because I was being impatient as I was desperate for a cut and usual hairdresser couldn't fit me for a few weeks, I had to phone and beg for a cancellation with her and get my hair cut much shorter than I wanted just to even it up, she did laugh at me and say it was my fault for cheating on her 🤣

I have a fantastic hairdresser reasonably priced, actually really cheap. Won’t take a tip! I always leave with a smile and amazing bouncy hair. She owns a very small salon and takes great pride in her job. I’d cross the country if she moved.

I always get told how dry my scalp is, often in a very disgusted tone.
I hate going to the hairdresser.

I had an amazing hairdresser and had such a laugh with him, he was kind, so empathic and warm. We are also both LGBT and would talk about who we fancied all the time. Unfortunately he has quit hairdressing since last year so now I'm going to be looking for someone new. Before him I had very bad experiences with hairdressers. I dye my hair myself at home-i trained as a hairdresser before I became Ill and luckily the colour comes out nice, but I will need to find a new salon to have it cut

I must have had really good luck with hairdressers, I used to go to a lovely chap who’d spent most of his career at the fanciest salon in town before he went self employed and was amazing, but always referred me to someone else for an updo because he openly admitted he was terrible at them. He also charged me half price when I went in for a wash and blow dry when I’d broken my elbow and couldn’t do it myself!

These days I work in a college so either one of the hairdressing lecturers does it or one of the students does, students are usually good but obviously it takes a while and some of them get a bit scared about doing a teacher’s hair. The lecturer is amazing and always makes me feel fabulous even if I’ve only popped in for a quick trim on my lunch break! I can’t wait for them to reopen!

I went to a lovely man, who not only did a wonderful cut, but always told me what good condition my hair was in, what a lovely colour it was (I told him I got it from Superdrug, and he told me how much I'd saved compared to getting it done by him), he asked after the family - I mean, properly remembered all about them - and thanked me for giving him my business. He also listened to my moans about work, so much so that I used to thank him for the free haircut with my therapy . He loved his job and kept a really good happy atmosphere in the shop.

Sadly he passed away, but he had trained his staff well, and they keep up the tradition.

It makes such a difference to have someone you are comfortable with.

@HazelWong

My hair has thinned a lot due to a medical condition and every time I go to the hairdresser, I get comments like "not much here, difficult to do much with this" like they somehow revel in humiliating me/making me feel shit about myself.

And they just can’t deal with fine/ thinning hair can they? I can make my hair look quite full and decent, but I leave a hairdresser looking like I have no hair at all to speak of!

I have a great hairdresser , well several - I don’t mind which one of them does my hair. It’s not a fancy place, their customers are mostly pensioners but I’ve never heard them say anything unpleasant to anyone. They give advice on home dying and good advice to those of us with thinning hair. I now know I can spray the roots which also colours the scalp and disguises the thinning. I used to go to a fancy designer place which did strand tests and every time I was told hair was in poor condition in an attempt to get me to buy expensive stuff. Both Dr and other hairdressers tell me that is a load of garbage- my hair is in good condition apart from the thinning (hereditary). So my advice is avoid the pretentious places . I pay £25 for a cut and blow dry and colour it myself at home. Sorted.

I have very thick hair. Hairdressers get this glint in their eyes when they get thinning scissors out. Thinning it out incidentally make it much worse. Years ago I went to a random hair salon with a Groupon voucher and the hairdresser called her colleague over to come look at my hair 'it's like a golden retriever's!'

I’ve had both lovely ones and rude ones but mostly mine don’t say much because I’m not chatty and just get a book out.

I’m getting greys now and spent a good while debating what to do - do I do home dyes (ideal for the next few years but not good after that when I get more as my worst hair nightmare is the grey line of roots at the top of otherwise dark hair from day 10 onwards or so) or spending more and more time at the hairdressers getting it highlighted, going every more regularly and getting quite dependant on them because if I just stop getting it dyed it’ll look awful. I’ve decided to just let nature take its course and welcome the grey hair. I don’t want to spend so much time worrying about my hair.

My hair is naturally a mousy brown/dark blonde colour but I prefer it really bright. I usually get a full head of blonde foils and lighter base and it’s in surprisingly good condition. And yet the amount of hairdressers who I’ve been to who try to convince me to go darker! I’ve been there, done that, didn’t suit it. In fact I didn’t like it at all. They say it would be “lower maintenance” but I don’t mind high maintenance as I’m willing to fork out for my hair, good news for them surely? I also get a “t bar” suggested but my hair is naturally to dark to get away with a t bar alone, I end up too dark underneath which I don’t like. I think they do this to free up time for other customers as a full head of highlights takes up a lot of their time. But IMO if I’m paying that sort of money to get my hair done I want it done properly

@FrostyChocolateMilkshake

Mine too. The pity I can't stand. And not listening when I say don't layer it because then there's not enough at the bottom

I've always cut my own hair, but very occasionally if i couldnt be arsed went to a local hairdressers. Last time was about 4 years ago, when she said in a loud voice 'oo you've got quite a lot of naughty ones' referring to my grey and tried to get me to dye them.
I was 53, of course i've got some grey bits ffs, why should i feel bad about them?