Parents going back on promise to help with childcare and money

[meeeeh]

So I’ve recently had a baby and bought a house. My brother has had a lot of help from my parents financially. I’ve never asked for anything but was told that when I bought a house I’d have help with a deposit as they felt strongly that me and my brother should have the same. I said they didn’t have to do this but they insisted they wanted to. Anyway they never gave me this money. I was then told I would have the money when my parents retired, this still hasn’t happened and I haven’t asked about it till now.
I was also promised when I was pregnant and when my baby was born that they would help with childcare to help me keep my job. Nothing has been mentioned of this for ages. Now I’m due back to work in a few months I asked if they would help out 1 or 2 days a week like they said and they said they can’t commit to set days but they will visit when they can (which doesn’t help with me going back to work). They said they want the freedom to do what they want, when they want with their retirement and not to be tied.
Re the money they’ve now said money is there if I desperately need it as opposed to it being given to put towards my house.
What annoys me the most is the false promises, why not just be honest from the start about all these things? Right now I am angry and feel I don’t want to speak to them because of this. AIBU?

The money bit is really unfair. When I give some money to the dc I give it to them at the same time then if circumstances change no one misses out.
However regarding the childcare bit I can see it from the parents position. Even though we only have one grandchild atm we could end up with several more. We have had a few comments about helping out etc from the dc. We have made it very clear to our lot not to expect childcare on a regular basis and we will help out occasionally but mostly we want to be grandparents to all of our gc equally but also we have a busy retirement planned.
Potentially if we had offered to do regular childcare and they start popping out left right and centre we could end up working more than full time in our mid 50s for 10/15+ years just when we were retiring. These are the years that we're hoping to go on lots and lots of holidays and adventures together not starting again with child rearing.

This kind of thing pisses me off. Don't tell someone you'll help them without them even asking and then fail to do so. Just keep your damned mouth shut.