Compared to parents of children who have special needs and do this day in day out not just in a pandemic. Now this is just my opinion but before I’m flamed just wait as it comes from me, a parent who has a child with Sen who has been completely failed by the education system/ school/ the local authority, a parent who has had their dc in and out of school for the last six years, on reduced timetables, excluded, sent to schools miles away out of borough with no support what so ever.
My ds is 11 next month and he is currently at a specialist school. By the age of 9 he had been to 3 schools, not including nursery where he was, at age 3, only allowed to attend for 1 hour a a day, and was also “asked” to leave wrap around club which meant I had to leave work as I had no childcare for him which was essential for me to do my job. He was excluded (by the back door eg managed moved forced on us) from his first school age 5 after spending most of reception on a reduced timetable and being sent home every couple of weeks. No school in borough could/would take him due to his complex needs/spaces available in school, so he ended up at a school in the next borough meaning I had to drive approximately 150 miles a week to get him there. I was that drained mentally that I didn’t even think to ask the local authority about parental mileage, which I later found out I was entitled to (and owed thousands by the time my ds left this school) and they didn’t tell me of course so I cracked on taking him to school.
After the first 9-10 months things started to go downhill and my ds was put on a reduced timetable again and I was expected do work with him at home in the afternoons which I did for about a year. This was horrendous as he would have huge meltdowns over doing it but his teacher would phone me if he didn’t do it and make a big deal about it.
The LA had meetings behind my back with the school and one day I went in and was told my son couldn’t go back after half term and they had found a specialist school for him. This school was completely unsuitable, they wanted him to go to a school for kids who (solely) had behaviour problems. My son is autistic and needed a small specialist setting with children similar to him and staff who were trained in supporting dc with autism. I refused to send him and ended up home schooling him for six months and had to go to a tribunal appeal, spend money I didn’t have, pay for independent reports which I had to use my credit card for and I’m now in debt. Whilst at the same time trying to provide my ds with some form of education. I was mentally physically and emotionally drained but eventually I got my ds into the school we so desperately wanted. He only started a year ago is now year six and I am faced with the sobering fact that my ds has more or less missed out on his entire primary education. It’s time we will never get back and despite the fact that he is very able in some ways, I very much doubt he will ever meet his potential due to all that he has been through.
Whilst I don’t doubt that home schooling has been hard for some parents, and I do get it,
I also find it hard to feel that much empathy for some people in particular who have the time, energy, money, resources to put into home schooling their kids yet do nothing
but moan. They really have no clue what it’s like to do this all the time and with a child who has Sen. Whilst I wouldn’t change my ds as he’s amazing, I can only
Imagine what it would be like to be able home school a neuro typical child who doesn’t face the challenges my ds does. Compared to what I deal with on a filet basis I honestly think it would be a walk in the park. So maybe on reflection people who are in the fortunate position to be able to spend extra time with their kids who are more able and who’s kids are happy to spend more time with them, maybe just see how lucky you are